Have you ever known someone who committed a serious crime?

[TheGhostsOfMeAndYou]

I’ve been listening to a true crime podcast recently and it got me thinking. One of the episodes was about Fred and Rose West. When Fred was first arrested (at the stage where police had only uncovered three bodies in the garden), his brother and sister-in-law spoke about him and said they couldn’t believe he’d done what he was accused of, as he had always seemed so gentle and polite spoken.

It made me wonder — has anyone here ever known someone who’s committed a serious crime, and did it come as a total shock? Or were there warning signs in hindsight? Did you ever suspect anything at the time? And how did others around them react — was it disbelief, or did some say they weren’t surprised?

Sadly not unusual, but mine was the local Monsignor, who my catholic neighbours regarded as the second coming

Like too many he turned out to be another paedophile, but was never convicted as he skipped to Ireland ahead of the police with a story about "going home to die of cancer", and many years he's still there enjoying a high position within the church

I've met four people in my life who have been 'guilty' of murder. It's bizarre really, because I do not move in criminal or violent circles AT ALL.

One of them was wrongly convicted of killing their children and later released, much too late actually because their life was never the same after that. They never recovered from the trauma and eventally died in very sad circumstances.

The other three people definitely both did it. Two were a real shock to me. The other not at all.

One was a man who was a very close friend of my grandparents when I was a young child. He had apparently served 15 years for murdering his wife and her lover when he was a young man. He'd known my grandparents his whole life and they'd forgiven him and accepted that he acted in the heat of the moment after catching them together, and it wasn't in his character to be violent generally. I never found any of this out until long after they were all dead and I was an adult.

One was someone I only met briefly but they were a pillar of the community type who completely lost it, murdered their family then killed themselves.

The other was a local lad who was violent and antisocial from an early age. He stabbed someone to death in a fight when he was still in his teens. It was always a matter of not 'if' but 'when' with him. It took a couple of weeks for him to be arrested and for his identity to be made public, but the local rumour mill was in full swing long before that. There was loads of witness inimidation going on as well. Absolutely nobody who knew him from school or the area in general was surprised by this news when it eventually came out.

I dread the day he's out of prison. His sentence felt like forever at the time, but the years have rushed by since then and he's probably only got another three years or so to do. I guarantee he won't be out for long before it happens again. He's an evil person who gets a kick out of being violent and causing chaos and fear wherever he goes.

Whereas the one I know should have been jailed for embezzlement but somehow managed to avoid prosecution.
I wasn't at all surprised to learn she had her fand in the till, as anyone who was paying attention could see that she was living well beyond her means.

I went to school with someone who killed a person with the end of a golf umbrella. He was a nice guy at school.

I know someone who kept his mother’s corpse at home to still access her pensions and cooperative shares. We don’t know whether the killed her as she was quite poorly and he was (supposedly) looking after her. Obviously with Covid everything went under the radar.

My mum had tried calling her a few times and her phone didn’t work, one day she bumped into him and he said she didn’t have a phone anymore as she couldn’t really use it herself. Because she was so unwell and it was Covid times my mum thought nothing of it.

Lovely lady, deserved a lot better.

I know a number of people who have gone to prison for drug offences, if you could that as serious.

A former boyfriend (from way back when) went to prison for serious sexual violence against a partner. He was never violent to me in the slightest but did something hideous to a later girlfriend.

I used to work closely with a man, about 15 years ago, who was convicted of stalking. He didn't get a prison sentence, but it was in the national press at the time because the object of his stalking was a celebrity.

I wasn't remotely shocked. I surprised that he'd chosen to stalk that particular celebrity but not surprised that he was a stalker. In fact, if someone had asked me to name someone I'd met who was most likely to turn out to be a stalker and/or serial killer, he would have been right at the top of my list.

Also when I was much younger I had a bar job for a year where I worked with someone who would have been around 25 at the time, and then about 20 years after that he was jailed for domestic abuse and possessing child sex abuse images. Of people who knew him/worked with him, there was quite an even split between the ones (like me) who said 'Yeah, that figures' and the ones who said 'Noooo, surely not him! He seemed like such a nice guy'. I find that really interesting, how different people get completely different vibes from the same person.

Horrendously my childminder's husband was a paedophile. He was caught when the police were given a load of credit card details to track people down and ultimately he went to prison.

he was also a teacher and tutor. His wife was clueless. We all were. It was truly awful. He was very mild mannered.

This would have been around then. Mind you, I'm not sure that adult company members would have needed them. I certainly don't remember having to get one when I turned 18.

DBS checks were 2012!

Wonder if we know the same person! In my case she avoided having the police called because she cried and promised to pay it back. I know she paid some back but everyone is convinced that it's just a fraction of what she actually took.

A local man with grown up children and grandkids now, has only just been released from jail from sex offences years ago, He was a manager of the local factory and was a renowned sex pest when he was younger. Took years for one women to come forward, once investigation started more women came forward. he got 10 years in jail but got out after 5. The mad thing is he wife has stood by him, wife and children believe its all lives - even after hearing all the evidence- he rocking around town like he did nothing wrong. Wife and Daughter is even on the community board and heavily involved with children work and he has taken part of events they have organised. At a gathering for a friend and he was also there , he tried to talk to my husband but he walked away from him, we cant believe how arrogant he has been and how welcoming people have been in the local community,

Yes a family member I was extremely close to was peadophile. I had zero idea or inkling not even a fleeting thought.

Then someone I worked with, killed someone through drink driving, very over the limit as in still drunk. Found out when he was sentenced and saw his picture in the local paper, there were no whispers in work as to why he abruptly left, so was surprised when I saw it.

Yes, a close relative is a paedophile with multiple convictions. I’ve got my head around it now but it took years and years. It tore the family apart. I feel I’ve lived my life lurking in shadows, so so ashamed.

The stereotype scout leader who ended up in jail for sexual crimes against children.
a friend’s ex murdered his partner and took his own lige
recently found out that someone I know has done time for causing a death by dangerous driving

Yes! I found out while browsing the bbc once that my uncle had been jailed for police corruption. I’m no contact but on fb of course his mum and mine were stating it was a miscarriage of justice. I wasn’t shocked, there isn’t a big age gap between us and he was scary growing up.

The stereotype scout leader who ended up in jail for sexual crimes against children.
a friend’s ex murdered his partner and took his own lige
recently found out that someone I know has done time for causing a death by dangerous driving

I imagine that's a very common story with most of these awful parents who make the news for similar reasons. It's tragic and also infuriating that all the signs were there, yet it happened anyway.

I knew someone who raped the family dog. He was really, really odd and gave me the absolute creeps. Poor dog.

I also know of someone who SA’d his own daughter. Oh and a guy who stabbed someone on a train. Also, someone who attacked a love rival with a machete. Come to think of it, I know a fair few 😳

My heart goes out to you. When I’ve seen high profile cases, I often wonder how awful it is for the family members of those left to pick up the pieces and feel guilty by association. I’m so sorry you feel that way.

I’m related to someone who was remanded in custody for a year on a charge of murdering his lover. He was found not guilty but we all think he did it.

Seems like the most common on here is sex crimes sadly.I dont know anyone whos done anything major.

Yes, as my (new) username indicates, I knew a woman who turned out to be a serious fraudster. She stole hundreds of thousands of pounds from an elderly victim and went to prison. Her house had to be sold under proceeds of crime rules. I almost crashed my car when I heard the local radio station reporting from her court case.

There was NO indication (to me at least) that she was capable of this. She'd previously worked in a very trusted occupation and had been a 'pillar of the community' type.

It's torn her family apart and she's now out of prison on parole and working for a charity which rehabilitates offenders.

Not a crime but a lesson that taught me not to trust appearances. As a student,, I was sitting in a group therapy session, at a psychiatric hospital. It was a 3 month,secondment, I'd been there for around 6 weeks so had got to know the attendees, about 8 people twice a week. Most of the talk was what you'd expect, addiction, social difficulties, phobias, obsessive behaviour etc. One of the men who had not spoken before, a cuddly old pipe-smoking grandad in a cardigan, a quiet and benevolent soul, began to speak of his fantasies. They would have done the Yorkshire Ripper credit. I can't express my shock and horror. It still both chills and amazes me that do much malevolence can be concealed so effectively. I was careful to avoid his company thereafter. He was an out- patient as were the rest and I wondered how his family lived with him. Perhaps they didnt know. Horrible and a lesson learned.

I know someone who SA'd 4 sisters 1 after the other. Police found a lot of child porn on his laptop. You would never have thought he would do that. He was a great dad.

I know two people (male) who are doing time for murder, two totally separate and unconnected crimes. One is the adult child of a friend of mine and the other is someone I knew through work many years ago.