So apparently I'm having 18 people for a lunch party on Monday.

[Womblealongwithme]

DH and I were supposed to be at a party 3 weeks ago and unfortunately, I came down with a sickness bug so DH went on his own.

He has just reminded me about the bank holiday party we're having on Monday and asked what I needed him to do for it. Except I wasn't at the party and knew nothing about said party. DH is the loveliest, kindest man on the planet and was diagnosed with ADHD about 10 years ago, which means that sometimes, he has conversations with me in his head, that don't quite make it to me! (Like inviting all and sundry to said bank holiday party!) So, dear readers, I need ideas from you lot quickly. We don't have a barbecue so I have my fridge and an oven and not a lot of kitchen space.

Add to that, that most of tomorrow will be taken up with various sporting activities for DS and DD so I don't have a whole lot of time, pretty much Monday morning only! Oh and it needs to cater for vegetarian and coeliac guests. Help!

Disclaimer - DH will absolutely be involved in prep and feel awful that he has sprung this on me!

I thought this too. If something was casually mentioned at a dinner party I wouldn't necessarily think it was happening unless I got a follow up call or text.

Also, you say DH didn't tell you because of his ADHD, but it's odd to me that he'd invite loads of people over without checking with you first, not just that he didn't "tell" you sooner.

36 (or even 54, if they are a greedy bunch) Pot Noodles, and hire a Burco Water Boiler for a continous supply of hot water.

Maybe put some balloons up, to add some extra fun and gaiety to the occasion.
👍

I find Google is invariably unhelpful for realistic suggestions: lots of BBC Good Food recipes I’m never going to make, or lengthy American blogs for mixing various packets and dousing it all in each dressing. Wouldn’t touch ChatGPT with a bargepole. Asking Mumsnet for what works tends to be more helpful and funnier.

Perhaps he has a drink problem?! Behave yourself.

I hate the growing idea that we should ask AI over communities of actual people. Prefering conversation and discussion with people over machines is not odd. Coming here to ask questions and get real answers from real people is perfectly valid and not indicative that there must be something else going on.

Asking Mumsnet for what works tends to be more helpful and funnier.

How's that worked out for you @Womblealongwithme ?!

Goodness @Womblealongwithme you’ve had some right nutters responding to your thread and you didn’t even post in AIBU. Well done on remaining so polite.

glad the buffet and party went well.

Well, the thread seems to have finally died. But, one last time, did any of them know there was a confirmed invitation before you WhatsApped them on Sunday?

Why does it matter ? OP confirmed that 14 of them turned up.

It matters because PPs have been accused of missing the point, misdirecting the thread and making incorrect assumptions. But if this is true, they were right.

Exactly. He did invite them, he didn’t ask op if she was okay with it. It appears she was lumbered entertaining 14 and putting together a buffet with his ‘help’. It just screams mug to me tbh.Slightly incredulous anyone would be okay with this in real life, but then my friends have self respect and dignity, and would be happy just to say no chance!

Anyway the thread has been extremely useful producing many idea for my next party 🤩

One last time, nobody fucking cares!

^

Yeah this

Well that's obviously not true, is it.

Why are you still here then posting???? 😂😂

Exit is that way 🥾

No, I'm saying he never invited them. Just like he imagined he told OP about it. OP realised he thought he'd had that conversation, but had not. What OP didn't realise, until much later (and won't confirm or deny it), was that he imagined the original invitation too.

Not really. OP posted for buffet ideas and ended up being told she was a mug, and that her husband was a selfish twat, despite having the autistic traits that elicit so much support on so many other threads. And despite saying several times that she had been very happily married for twenty five years she was repeatedly told that she was a doormat who didn’t even realise her marriage was clearly in trouble.

She was variously advised that she should leave her DH to sort the food out himself - and in some cases just leave him !! Or just go out for the day and leave him to it - again despite confirming that the people he invited were their friends and despite being slightly miffed she was happy to host.

l think the main take away from this particular thread is that MN is rapidly turning into a vicious nest of vipers who seemingly have such transactional and shallow relationships with their own partners that they will jump on any OP and try to rip apart their words to find one minute detail that proves the OP’s life is as miserable and petty as their own.

Agree with this. Plus relentlessly trying to goad the OP into responding to a “finally dead” thread that was resolved days ago is bordering on unhinged.

...about what I'm quoting 😉

@Rosscameasdoody OP posted for buffet ideas

I think at current count she's been told that her threads a hoax, she is a mug, a doormat, lacking any dignity or self respect and her husband is possibly an alcoholic.

And worst of all not one single person suggested the infamous MN massive salad.

Yep, nothing like women telling another woman that she isnt living up to their standards. And then pretending they are saying it for her own good.
I think there is a name for that.

Everyone has their own take. But what fascinates me is that early PPs wondered whether DH had confabulated the original invitation. OP studiously avoids this question throughout. There is another thread about a serious corporate cock-up. Something to do with compliance that threatened business continuity. It turns on eliciting who knew what and when. Having once been the person who would have investigated this, I recognise this phenomenon. I suspect OP realised late on, and went on the defensive or in denial. Just how defensive is what continues to really interest me.

This is just getting laughable now 😂

Not one single person! Still, at least we scooped the 'All doormats are horizontal' comment, an absolute gem.

You are so right

... except for the bit that there wasn't a party in the first place! DH had never invited any guests. It all came together when OP sent a message and they had an impromptu gathering.