To share my list of things wrong with my DH - feel free to share yours!

[Internationalwomendayheadquarters]

I know I’m not perfect but I’m not sure if I can stay married any longer. Here are some things my DH does that I can’t stand.

1. He told me that he doesn’t want to donate to the RNLI any more as they are picking up migrants in small boats.
2. Told me he hates women’s football.
3. Constantly makes comments about women’s appearance, either while out and about or on TV. This is in front of our two girls and I don’t want them hearing it.
4. Has not made me orgasm in over 2 years as I’ve got the ick.
5. Leaves all our bed sheets yellow all the time as he can’t be bothered to shower more than twice a week. (Has the gross oily back of the head thing that men over 50 get)
6. Times how long the children have for dinner so that they end up forcing their food and have got indigestion once from it.
7. He’s 14 years older than me. He just doesn’t have the positivity any more that he used to. We’ve just been away with friends and he basically didn’t stop moaning the whole time.
8. Never buys a gift for my birthday or anniversary.

What should I do? We started off having a lot in common but now he is more right wing and quite frankly I find his views insufferable and they have really changed the way I feel about him.

You should!

Are you married to Joey Barton?

My hubby click baits all these negative stuff and expects the worse. Kier will come to get us, Rachel will grab our money!! I hate clicky bait

I would actually end the relationship on points 3 and 6 alone. Your children need to be your priority

This point alone, and the silence bit on top?! OMG! Meals times should be relaxed, family bonding, time!

Plus the comments about women’s bodies, when you have daughters?!

Please call it a day with him before he does any more damage.

And I don’t say that lightly!!

It is not reasonable at all! Don’t use your own dad as a reference point. DH may not be as bad as your dad, but he is still way off the mark!!

Maybe some therapy and work on assertion would help. You’re aware you struggle with this. Get the fire in your belly to act. But yes, maybe seek advise first so you can do so safely and practically. Start sorting an exit strategy.

How else is he controlling, OP?

Kindly, OP, this! With bells on!!

Yes, probably. The going through your phone should probably be reason enough 😕

😂

@Internationalwomendayheadquarters
He sounds repulsive. Please leave him for the sake of you and your children.
You are worth so much more than this. 💐

This. I would fight for no, limited, or supervised contact given the emotional abuse.

Seek advice, keep a log of behaviours he does, to the online Freedom programme, it’s only £12 but gives examples of different types of abuse, AND what the healthy alternative looks like too.

Yes, you’re here now, don’t dwell on failings, focus on what you can now do moving forward! You can be strong, you can do this, OP. Get angry, fight for your children’s sake, you won’t regret it!!

Does he have any allergies that are deadly? Might be worth trying some new recipes!

The only issue I have with my DP is that he doesn't always rinse the dishes after washing them properly. This threads made me feel better. Please leave this mysoginistic pig.

He sounds like he has ADHD - poor short term memory and struggling to organise and tidy while being unable to cope in mess. Issues with word finding and forgetting what he’s saying half way through. Leaving cupboard doors open is a bit of a classic!

OP - your DH sounds vile and the fact you don’t feel you can challenge him on the timing of your children’s meals is worrying in itself.

It's weird you said that as I've thought that for a long time. Our oldest son has autism and can be the same way. I know it's not his fault but my god he drives me absolutely insane! The cupboard door thing is a universal man thing I think - my brothers are the same!

I never say this but honestly, life is too short for this; LTB.

Shower only twice a week? That is very disgusting behaviour. He must absolutely reek and stinks everywhere he walks. I don't want to imagine his minging pants. And bet he doesn't wipe himself properly after number 2.
Men like these are what is so horrible about human race.

I was just reading about the cupboards and thinking: that's so me! I have many other apparently male traits, like being excellent at map reading but useless at finding things. DH is the nagger of the house.

Are you able to put your foot down over the children's meal times?

Ohhhh I wonder if it may be an ADHD thing? Do you have any other traits? I have researched it extensively (especially when my son was being diagnosed with autism I was comparing as they mentioned ADHD in the assessment)
I am amazed you can read a map, I am utterly hopeless. I get lost with Google maps 😆
I must admit I am definitely the nagger of the house. I must be relentless!

Yeah wtf is that?
The meals thing is awful. The age gap is far too big, and his negativity is a drain. The kids will be happier away from the atmosphere and with a happier mum.

Why are you still having sex? There is no way I would be doing the deed with such a nasty man. Please learn to value yourself.

@Internationalwomendayheadquarters

Are you ok?

@MusicMakesItAllBetter thank you. I’m here and I’m ok. We’ve just got back from Cornwall for a week.

It should have been lovely being by the sea for a week, but he moaned about everything, openly said how much he didn’t like spending time with the children and made it unpleasant for me.

The worst part is his terrible aggressive driving and road rage. He cannot stand being stuck behind anyone while driving and starts making erratic overtakes. I hate it.

When are you going to stop putting you and your children in danger.You need to leave this man and find the peace you and your children deserve.