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Original poster

How many cousins do you have/ your DC have?

268 replies

Allswellthatendswelll · 27/07/2025 18:44

Inspired by this article in the Times:

https://www.thetimes.com/life-style/parenting/article/why-cousins-are-dying-out-it-matters-more-than-you-think-d6vr0rgtx

It's behind a paywall sorry but basically it says due to declining birthrates children born now are much less likely to have lots of cousins. I think down from average 7 to 5 but falling quite a bit. The article argues that this means children have less peers their age in family gatherings to play with and smaller networks.

I find it very interesting as I have 13 cousins but I'm not very close to any of them as an adult. My DC have 4 for now but probably 7 or 8 once everyone is done. I'm quite glad they have quite a few cousins but perhaps we are becoming more unusual as all our siblings have kids or intend to.

Why cousins are a dying breed — it matters more than you might think

In the 1970s a British teenager had seven on average. Today it’s five and projected to fall further, with consequences that can be profound

https://www.thetimes.com/life-style/parenting/article/why-cousins-are-dying-out-it-matters-more-than-you-think-d6vr0rgtx

OP posts:
imnotwhoyouthinkiam · 27/07/2025 20:36

I have 8 cousins. The youngest is 28 years younger than me though, so the "same age" thing is irrelevant.

My children have 6 (3 bio, 3 step) on my side and 6 (I think) on their DFs side.

Mummypie21 · 27/07/2025 20:37

I have 19 first cousins (my dad had 5 siblings and my mum had 4 siblings). My DC have 1 first cousin (from my only brother). DH has an older brother who is single and has no kids.

LadyFlumpalot · 27/07/2025 20:37

None and none. Both parents were only children and my sister has no desire to have children just yet. I have some step cousins if that counts?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
evtheria · 27/07/2025 20:37

I had about 40, all mother’s side.
My DS has 6 from both sides of the family.

HÆLTHEPAIN · 27/07/2025 20:39

I have 17 (& 2 bonus ones that are the half siblings of 2 of the 17). Though I don’t see that many of them these days.

My kids have 5.

Butteredtoast55 · 27/07/2025 20:40

I have loads, my adult children have 9. So far there are 3 in the next generation.

Tuxeda · 27/07/2025 20:40

I have 3 from each parental side - 2 of whom I have never met! So 6 altogether. Estranged from all now. Extremely disfunctional family.

My children have 8 cousins via DH and 1 from my side. DH has no first cousins. Both his parents were only children.

helphelpimbeingrepressed · 27/07/2025 20:42

I have two first cousins. I see one of them occasionally, the other is off grid and doesn’t speak to her family.

my DCs have 7 first cousins. There is quite a big age gap so 4 of them are very young but they’re very close to the older ones.

Cuzmccuz · 27/07/2025 20:42

I have 5 first cousins. One is in my close friendship group, and I am close to two of the other three who are similar in age to me. The youngest has always lived abroad but I love her dearly and she knows she is welcome to stay at ours when in the UK.

My brother can’t have children, but my children have a step cousin via him, and they have three “real” cousins on my husband’s side. Because husband and I are both close to our cousins, our children would actually say that they have an additional 13 cousins, as we tend to include our own cousin’s children in the total! They are very close to the four who live in the UK and the youngest two abroad. Confusing, but grateful for all the built in pals!

youspinmerightround22 · 27/07/2025 20:43

My kids have three cousins but they are all older my two are 5 and 4 their cousins are 13,15 and 18. I’m an only child and DH has a brother who had his kids quite young where we had our kids in our 30s. They aren’t close the age gap is too big. I have over 30 cousins my mum is one of 6 and my dad one of 7.

Kuretake · 27/07/2025 20:44

I have 12, had 10 actually sadly one has died.

My son has 6.

AngelsWithSilverWings · 27/07/2025 20:46

I had to count and even then forgot some and had to start counting again! I now know I have 20 cousins. I'm not close to any of them. We were close growing up as kids but as 50 somethings we have our own stuff going on. Three are no longer with us.

My two DC have a total of three cousins and that's all they will ever have.

DH has 8 cousin.

TheCoralEagle · 27/07/2025 20:48

I have 6 cousins. Dh has 1.

Our dc have 5 (so far). I imagine that will increase though as my two siblings are yet to have dc and one of dh's will probably have more.

CountryShepherd · 27/07/2025 20:48

I have 12 cousins, I would say I'm quite close to lots of them - just been to stay with two of them.

Eldest 3 DC's have 9, their younger half sister has 16 cousins.

Apparently DH has no idea about his family, not interested in even trying to work it out!

8misskitty8 · 27/07/2025 20:49

I’ve got 18 cousins. But half of them are 15-20 years older than me. Im close with only a couple.
DH has 14 cousins. Hardly sees any of them.
Our children only have 1.

Isitreallysohard · 27/07/2025 20:50

Dads side 14, DC 14
Mums side 5, DC 3
Guess there is a declining population!

Dads side we are all very close, cousins are the best! 💗

Skissors · 27/07/2025 20:50

I have 3 first cousins- which seemed like a perfectly reasonable amount growing up.
It didn't occur to me that most people had more.

My DC have 2 cousins.

Newlysinglemumma · 27/07/2025 20:51

I have 15 (4 from my dads side and 11 on mums side) my children have 22 (3 from my sister and the rest from there dads 5 siblings) they only see my sisters children and occasionally 1 from there dads side. There dad is from the travelling community and I have no idea how many cousins he got but it is a lot! It’s sad really because they are all close in age and they have 4 aunties and 3 uncles on dads side but they don’t no any of them!

Squarestones · 27/07/2025 20:51

I have 9, 4 on my mum's side I never really met, five in dad's side who are much older than me i don't have the closest relationship though I do know them, like them and feel a bond with them. My (also much older) siblings are close to them, still visit etc.

My children have 10 cousins, we go on holiday with one side of the family every year, see at Christmas and Easter or big birthdays.with the other side we see them several times a year for weekends, used to be more often as they loved close by
They're all pretty close though mostly mine are closest to the ones who are nearest to them in age.

I think cousins relationships can be so wonderful, it gives you a sense of belonging and also can shake you out of sibling 'positions' - IE my eldest DC is one of the middle cousins so it gives him a sense of having older peers to learn from and a taste of being the one who gets told what to do, rather than bossing his siblings about.

Kdub · 27/07/2025 20:51

I had 6 but my kids don't and won't have any.

SevernWonders · 27/07/2025 20:53

Me: 16
My DC: 6

Clocloxx · 27/07/2025 20:54

I must have at least 45 first cousins if not more all different age groups different countries so only close to a handful but my daughter only has 1 first cousin

BruFord · 27/07/2025 20:55

Allswellthatendswelll · 27/07/2025 20:13

Obviously it's not a huge issue of birthrates falling but it's just an interesting consequence. I think in the past centuries cousins would have probably formed quite a large part of one's social network as people didn't move around as much. I'm quite a demography nerd!

Show quote history

Yes, @Allswellthatendswelll , I think that cousins often were a bigger part of people’s social networks in the past. My Dad (87) had loads of cousins and they were always meeting up and going to places together. Plus big family picnics and gatherings.

Unfortunately, he and his siblings were always falling out so I didn’t see as much of my cousins. I’m more in touch with them now. DH spent a fair amount of times with his cousins growing up. We still see them at big family occasions like weddings but everyone’s v. geographically scattered now.

I’ve got five first cousins, my children don’t have any. I’m an only and DH’s siblings all chose to be childfree. Happily though, my first cousins have children close in age to mine-so they’ve got a few second cousins!

Londonmummy66 · 27/07/2025 20:56

12 first cousins all on DM's side as DF was an only. A ridiculous number of seconds though as all GPs came from enormous families. Not close with any of them as they were all a lot older than me. (DM was a surprise menopause baby.)

DDs have 6 cousins - get on well with the older 4 (2 on my side and 2 on DH's). Remaining 2 are revolting spoilt brats (my side) that no one wants to deal with - just like their father.....

TheFormidableMrsC · 27/07/2025 20:56

I have a lot of cousins. Irish Dad. I am close to maybe 10 and we have a group chat and try and meet regularly. Sadly my kids have had no such luck. They have one cousin and one step cousin on my side. My daughter has none on her Dad’s side. My son has quite a few cousins on my ex-h’s side but he’s chosen to abandon our son and his family did the same so son has no relationship with them sadly. Obviously they have second cousins in my cousins.