Excellent insults that have fallen out of fashion / you don’t hear anymore…

[FusionChefGeoff]

Twerp
Berk

I want to teach my 10 and 13 year olds some ‘funny’ insults from back in the day - any others that need resurrecting??

The police still love this and dole it out!

You're so ugly even the tide wouldn't take you out.

My Great Aunt Lizzy died at 106...
She called women who were keen on men "fast pieces."
She trained as a nurse in the
1920s. She didn't like her Matron and called her "A spiteful cat!"
She was an absolute legend.. Her half sister who was 18 years younger looked after her. Lizzy was blind towards the end and had talking books. Her sister banned thrillers and murder mysteries at bedtime as she got excited and wouldn't go to sleep.
She could remember the Peasenhall Murder en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peasenhall murder and used to love talking about it..

This a favourite of l mine l have used continuously. Normally they are a fucking bellend though

My dad, on seeing 2 people who were together and perhaps not the prettiest, used to say ‘Would be a shame to spoil 2 houses’. He was the opposite of politically correct.

Spud is an affectionate insult that my DH uses to describe the dogs when they do something silly.

Like the “Carry On” quip.. Her name was Berk.. married a Wright.. became a Wright Berk!!

My favourite, I use it liberally.

@Elderflower14 My grandma used to call them "a warm cup of tea"!

This one has really tickled me - it's the best of them all 💀😂

Jitter

Away and take yer face fur a shite

Every day's a school day!

Shut your cake hole.
Shut your gob and give your arse a chance.

One I heard from an Irish colleague, "Scarlet for you, scarlah for your ma for having you"

Still like using this now!

Smeghead (for all the Red Dwarf fans)

Not really an insult, but I do love to use “Don’t you have an elsewhere to be?” as an alternative to Sod Off! (One for the Buffy fans)

Use this one on a daily basis🤣

Dont be such a gimp
She’s really Aggy

omg. window licker is my grandsons pet name from his papa (my husband) Many years ago when he was around 4ish , I watched my grandkids often as they lived next door and I was the default babysitter. It was Canada , winters cold. We had screen doors that during the summer the main door was open, then the screen door outside of that, so no flies or mozzies get in but air thru the house. Winter the screen was replaced with a glass panel. My lovely dogs (rip our Lexi and your crazy son Seamus) would head to the door every day about five min before my husband was due home and I would always open the main door and let the dogs watch for him. Warm house , cold glass made frost and the dogs would lick . My husband arrived home one afternoon to see two big black standard poodles, and in the middle a four year old boy. All licking the window. My grandson is turning 16, his papa still calls him window licker. Thanks for that reminder as I am missing them alot right now

This is a phrase not a word, but I once heard a Sgt say to a squaddie "what does your village do for an idiot when you go on holiday?"

Which one?

Nit.

Dope.

I never hear anyone use 'Dickhead' anymore.

Also a big fan of the term 'Bedwetter' 😅

Women who'd had a varied love life!

Baby elephant

not nice - give you something to cry about