Excellent insults that have fallen out of fashion / you don’t hear anymore…

[FusionChefGeoff]

Twerp
Berk

I want to teach my 10 and 13 year olds some ‘funny’ insults from back in the day - any others that need resurrecting??

This was everywhere in th 80s all over the country, well certainly in south london at our school. Unfortunate reference to Joey Deacon who was on Blue Peter as part of an appeal about his disability. So everyone got called a Joey.

That refers derogatively to a young man with severe cerebral palsy who was on Blue Peter a few times in the 80s.

If your children know any Manchester United fans, when they return to school, they could ask them about their weekday evening plans for the autumn.

A good subtle dig.

Didn't they name a chocolate after you?

Born Vile.

Cowbag

You absolute melt.

They look like they've had a tough paper round.

Blokes only - cad and bounder. I once read what the difference is - it was very funny but I’ve forgotten it.

That would be me 😜

I call people 'toads' quite often, too

I know it's a bit misogynist, but Whoreson (at the beginning of Shakespeare's the Tempest).

I also still use doughnut a lot 😅🤣

Dingleberry
Clod- (pate) = thick
Doofus
Dickhead
Hoser (idiot/moron) and not used here but I miss it
Dappy
Ditz(y)
Klutz

That came about because of a man by that name appeared on blue Peter he was seriously disabled and had speech issues.
It was used Ne Scotland as well
Obviously highly offensive.

Well that's good because we hate liars bounders and cads, don't we Blackadder

I remember the Joey (Joey Deacon) one. A huge backfire from Blue Peter as other posters have said.
'You're as much use as a chocolate teapot'
Shit for brains
Living in cloud cuckoo land
One sandwich short of a picnic
Catalogue girl (someone who dress head to toe in cheap matching items)

DH still uses this about pretty much anyone under 25.

Nogin

Twonk, doughnut, wolly or woll this won’t be appropriate but cockwomble don’t forget bellend.

Slack ha’porth

My mum used to say of someone who couldn't sing 'they can't hold a tune in a bucket'!

Where I came from it was 'boilers' as in a chicken you'd boil not roast as it was not the best.

”Yer Da’ sells Avon”

Floozie - one of my favourites

Love this.

'fuckin gonk' is a winner, although perhaps not for the purpose OP intended.

I'd forgotten fucking gonk 😁
Perhaps not what op had in mind for her 10 year old as you pointed out.

😆