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Lack of range on this forum

109 replies

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 10:24

I am relatively new to posting on here but one thing that's stood out is a complete lack of range when discussing a variety of topics. Not everyone, but enough for it to be noticeable for me.

Take that recent £100k salary one which was littered with accusations of jealousy, laziness and entitlement to their money 😆. There were some reasonable counterpoints about how the salary doesn't stretch how it should and isn't exactly rich - fair enough - but some of the takes were just defensive when people raised wider points on capitalism, nepotism and societal structures impact how we progress. They took it as dismissing any hard work on their part. One person even brought in a great point about desirability politics in the workplace and the barriers/opportunities that stem from that but was basically told they needed to work on their self esteem (mind you, the person who responded this had the nerve to talk about my intelligence 😏).

There was one talking about teenagers skimpy clothing "these" days (already a-historical when you look at the evolution of style and attitudes towards respectability in dressing through the ages; conservative dressing has always been relative) and it went quickly to rape apologist rhetoric, rather than distinguishing between challenging hyper-sexualisation vs empowerment and abuse, which is a different category and nothing to do with how we dress.

I see this lack of nuance when discussing behaviour in children and adults. Given how many parents are on here it's shocking how many appear wilfully ignorant of child development stages (and a completely disregard for children as people generally, but that's a different conversation). Tantrums are seen as a sign of bad parenting or "naughty children". Teenagers with challenging behaviour are brats and other derogatives. When a young person or even adult does something wrong and that wrongdoing can be tied to a previous trauma or environmental circumstance, there is no interest in digging into what wider patterns we see and they believe if you do this you are trying to excuse the behaviour rather than understand it. Basic critical thinking gets eyerolls and called "woke nonsense".

And I am not just talking about people who I don't agree with. It's one thing to have a different take and ideology, and still apply range. And this isn't me thinking I'm smarter than everyone either (although if that's anyone's takeaway I will leave that with them). Not knowing something isn't the same as being stubbornly obtuse.

Anyone else feel this way? Feel free to ask me to clarify anything that isn't clear.

OP posts:
MeringueOutang · 01/07/2025 11:30

Yeah you're assuming everyone here has had a university education, deep learning in critical theory, as well as having qualifications in child psychology...
I think you're expecting too much of a bunch of mostly ordinary people.

BIWI · 01/07/2025 11:30

… and even intelligent, well-educated posters sometimes/often just want to talk shit!

TheAutumnCrow · 01/07/2025 11:33

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 11:29

I get that but sometimes the topics are deeper and the range is still lacking.

So go into topics, then, as has been suggested. It really isn't that complex.

AIBU and Chat are very different, for a reason. If an MN AIBU discussion is, say, influencing Labour government policy, it really shouldn't be.

TheAutumnCrow · 01/07/2025 11:34

BIWI · 01/07/2025 11:30

… and even intelligent, well-educated posters sometimes/often just want to talk shit!

Who, me, guv? 😬

BIWI · 01/07/2025 11:34

innit!

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 11:45

MeringueOutang · 01/07/2025 11:30

Yeah you're assuming everyone here has had a university education, deep learning in critical theory, as well as having qualifications in child psychology...
I think you're expecting too much of a bunch of mostly ordinary people.

Absolutely not. None of the topics I have given examples of are degree specific and are areas we all have experience with from basic life as parents, working people, women, etc. I don't have a degree in child psychology. I am a mama who was interested in understanding child behaviour so looked into it.

On a separately note, there is a lot of great class/feminist theory that comes from people outside of academia.

OP posts:
AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 11:48

Unsurprised some of you have come in here triggered and projecting. That's your issue to deal with.

OP posts:
AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 11:52

AlternativeView · 01/07/2025 11:16

It's a chat forum not university lectures

Again, I disagree with this idea that you need a degree to understand that women dressing conservatively isn't going to end sexual harassment or that a troubled background can impact your life choices.

OP posts:
WhereOnEarthIsMyPlanet · 01/07/2025 11:53

What’s the point of this post? Genuine question. Even if people on here agree that you’re absolutely right, it isn’t going to change the way the majority post on MN. If the forum isn’t for you then it isn’t for you, not everyone fits into every space.

noblegiraffe · 01/07/2025 11:55

Feel free to ask me to clarify anything that isn't clear.

What are you hoping for from this thread? Because it comes off as much as a goady bun fight OP as ‘£100k isn’t a lot of money’. I’m not seeing any particularly brilliant analysis from you, just a poke at how thick we all are.

EllieQ · 01/07/2025 12:00

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 11:52

Again, I disagree with this idea that you need a degree to understand that women dressing conservatively isn't going to end sexual harassment or that a troubled background can impact your life choices.

I believe the poster you quoted meant that as it’s a chat forum, you shouldn’t expect the discussions to be like university lectures (in terms of depth of discussion and engagement), not that you need a degree to understand the issues.

PractisingMyTelekenipsis · 01/07/2025 12:00

I've learnt loads from MN over the years. It doesn't even need to be an in depth thread for someone to learn something new. Sometimes just a different opinion can be enough to cause someone to either do further research or just consider a point that hadn't occurred to them.

somejust · 01/07/2025 12:01

I think some posters (jaded) do not engage in a meaningful way or give the OP considered/critical attention because some threads many are made up/goady.
Skimpy dressing, salaries, twins, gay/greedy husbands, wayward teens, school shoes....are just a few of the favourites. (HTH 😉)

Rizzz · 01/07/2025 12:03

The OP made me curious enough to read the £100k thread and her replies 'range' from "urgh leave me alone loser" to "But I wanted to and did so that’s that", when she was rude and someone said "No need to take that line" 🤣

So no, I don't think anyone will be taking away that you're 'smarter than everyone'.

Don't worry yourself about that.

BIWI · 01/07/2025 12:04

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 11:48

Unsurprised some of you have come in here triggered and projecting. That's your issue to deal with.

Ha ha ha ha!

Now I know you’re being goady.

No issues to deal with here, thank you very much. I’m quite happy with the range of subjects on MN as well as with the manner that (most) people post.

It’s you who seems to have the issue Grin

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 12:09

PractisingMyTelekenipsis · 01/07/2025 12:00

I've learnt loads from MN over the years. It doesn't even need to be an in depth thread for someone to learn something new. Sometimes just a different opinion can be enough to cause someone to either do further research or just consider a point that hadn't occurred to them.

I have also learned loads in other spaces where it was just general chitchat, banter or shenanigans! A topic doesn't have to be serious to learn from it; that's not what I am saying. Not complaining topics here aren't serious enough. I love to just vibe and be silly. I am saying I personally believe that nuance and range are missing where it needs to be present (e.g. dressing and sexual harassment).

OP posts:
noblegiraffe · 01/07/2025 12:18

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 12:09

I have also learned loads in other spaces where it was just general chitchat, banter or shenanigans! A topic doesn't have to be serious to learn from it; that's not what I am saying. Not complaining topics here aren't serious enough. I love to just vibe and be silly. I am saying I personally believe that nuance and range are missing where it needs to be present (e.g. dressing and sexual harassment).

Then present that nuance? And if you are dismissed that easily, then argue your points better.

Chewbecca · 01/07/2025 12:23

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 12:09

I have also learned loads in other spaces where it was just general chitchat, banter or shenanigans! A topic doesn't have to be serious to learn from it; that's not what I am saying. Not complaining topics here aren't serious enough. I love to just vibe and be silly. I am saying I personally believe that nuance and range are missing where it needs to be present (e.g. dressing and sexual harassment).

But it simply represents the range of views in the MN population.

Present your own view too if you want.

All views welcome IMO, I find all opinions interesting, that's life!

Lioncub2020 · 01/07/2025 12:24

It sounds like the type of things a man might right to wind up the women...

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 12:25

Chewbecca · 01/07/2025 12:23

But it simply represents the range of views in the MN population.

Present your own view too if you want.

All views welcome IMO, I find all opinions interesting, that's life!

I do present my views on here!

OP posts:
AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 12:29

EllieQ · 01/07/2025 12:00

I believe the poster you quoted meant that as it’s a chat forum, you shouldn’t expect the discussions to be like university lectures (in terms of depth of discussion and engagement), not that you need a degree to understand the issues.

Ah okay thanks, although I don't think expecting more range is asking for university style lectures either

OP posts:
Profhilodisaster · 01/07/2025 12:32

Maybe tell the people on the actual threads that their posts aren't to your liking , tell them that they need to be more nuanced. No good telling us as we can't really do much about it 🤷‍♀️

PractisingMyTelekenipsis · 01/07/2025 12:32

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 12:09

I have also learned loads in other spaces where it was just general chitchat, banter or shenanigans! A topic doesn't have to be serious to learn from it; that's not what I am saying. Not complaining topics here aren't serious enough. I love to just vibe and be silly. I am saying I personally believe that nuance and range are missing where it needs to be present (e.g. dressing and sexual harassment).

I've found it varies. One day you'll get everyone agreeing that benefits are too high and everyone should have to sweep the streets in exchange for them (for example)
A week later a very similar thread could be most people saying they are too low etc.

BIWI · 01/07/2025 12:33

Lioncub2020 · 01/07/2025 12:24

It sounds like the type of things a man might right to wind up the women...

I agree. Interesting that the two topics mentioned are about sex. Why would someone want ‘more nuance’ about those?

Herbert.

AguNwaanyi · 01/07/2025 12:38

From what I have seen so far, there are many disdainful views on people that receive benefits, which I think is a general classism issue this country has that is reflected in most spaces.

OP posts: