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Need a hand hold - husband sick in a foreign country

176 replies

Surf2Live · 01/06/2025 18:06

Firstly, I'm getting through this, but I'm all alone and I don't want to burden him with my fears and there's no one I can speak to right now to support me.

We are digital nomads. When everything is working well, it's a fantastic sense of freedom and I love my life. But when things go wrong, it's enormous pressure.

Last night I drove him to the hospital, after a few days of being unwell, the pain was getting worse. When I suggested it, he said okay, then I knew it was definitely time to go. We got back to our accomodation at 4am.

We just arrived in a new country 2 days ago. Neither of us speak the language. It's not close to either English or Spanish, the two languages we do speak.

I'm navigating a foreign country, new city, no language skills, scared for my husband who is sleeping a lot and quite unwell, all while still having to run my online business.

Tomorrow I have to drive us to our next city where thankfully we have a 2 month say organised. It's a 3 hour drive. I can do this. I have to unload the car in the centre of the new city into a new apartment, with a sick husband. I can do this, I know I can, but it's still a lot.

The business relies upon me mostly. I'm the primary content creator. I trained two other employees but neither of them can yet do my job. So I have about 2 hours work to do tomorrow before we can leave, or after we arrive. Luckily my business can be flexible.

I guess, all I want here please is some hand holding because I'm so alone right now. I have so much on my shoulders, which normally is fine when I have my husband by my side to support me, but when he's sick I'm so alone.

OP posts:
MixedBananas · 28/06/2025 10:30

So sorry OP for your amd your sons loss. hug

Denimwondersuit · 28/06/2025 10:40

Thoughts are with you OP, hope you have some support. Having been through something similar I know how painful it is. Sending love

Minfilia · 28/06/2025 10:46

Horrific update, I’m so sorry for you OP.

You’ll be okay in time. Just do what you can to get through each hour/day/week.

Thinking of you both and sending virtual hugs x

Muffinmam · 28/06/2025 10:58

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MassiveOvaryaction · 28/06/2025 10:59

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You might want to check op's updates and edit your comment. Your 'advice' isn't helpful here.

Mynewnameis · 28/06/2025 11:04

So sorry to hear your tragic news.
I hope you can get some assistance with returning home.

Sunshineandrainbow · 28/06/2025 11:07

Thinking of you 💞

Beachtastic · 28/06/2025 11:12

OP 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

I can't think of any words to express how sorry I am.

What a frightening and traumatic experience, your grief must be on hold at the moment while you find your way back to a place you can call home.

For all this to unfold is horrifice enough, but in Germany...!!!!!!!

I wish I could send you the energy you need to get through the long and difficult journeys ahead of you. XXXXX

Beachtastic · 28/06/2025 11:23

If you have time, and if it helps you to record things, perhaps write it all down somewhere - all the confusion and terror, in all its detail, so that you have "filed" it in your head and can focus on the absurd challenges of the present. That sort of journalling has helped me in the past with extreme situations, but not this extreme so I'm only suggesting it here in case it's of any use to you. Not sure what is, really. Much love to you X

PoisedGoldBiscuit · 28/06/2025 11:24

Shocked to read your update up op, I'm so sorry to hear this, thinking of you and your son 😞

LiesDoNotBecomeUs · 28/06/2025 11:28

So sorry to hear this OP.
The shock must be terrible.
The grief will be too.

You will get through this with your son. It is a terrible path but you are not alone on it. There will be comfort. Believe this though it seems impossible.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 28/06/2025 11:29

OP I'm extremely sorry to learn of your dear husband's death. What a shock and a tragedy.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 28/06/2025 11:30

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At least read all the OP's posts!

HerNeighbourTotoro · 28/06/2025 11:30

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Sadly for you too late to edit this insentisive, judgemental comment.

HaveTeaWillSurvive · 28/06/2025 11:53

No words just a gentle hand in your shoulder, lending support and condolences x

Everydayimwingingit · 28/06/2025 11:57

I'm so sorry for your loss ❤️

RandomMess · 28/06/2025 12:00

So sorry Flowers

Weenurse · 28/06/2025 12:44

So sorry for your loss 💐

Dodeedoo · 28/06/2025 13:19

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Jesus Christ. Atleast read the fucking updates!

so sorry to hear this op. Thoughts are with you and your son xx

Bikergran · 28/06/2025 13:28

So, so sorry for your loss in such traumatic circumstances. Sending you handholds, hugs, and whatever else would help. Wishing you and your son strength and future happiness.

FunAtFiftySomething · 28/06/2025 13:54

I probably don't have anything useful to add , op but just to say I am so sorry for your loss. Please take one tiny step at a time and make use of all offers of support and help. 💐

RicardoOrchard · 28/06/2025 13:58

Oh OP, that’s awful. I’m so very sorry.

AndSoFinally · 28/06/2025 14:58

Im so sorry for your loss. What a terrible shock. Love to you and your son xx

Cursula · 28/06/2025 15:10

I’m so sorry to hear this dreadful news OP.

saraclara · 28/06/2025 15:29

Oh how shocking. I'm so sorry. I can't imagine the trauma.

How old was he, and how old is your son?

The international death admin on to of your grief and shock must be all consuming. I do hope that someone can keep the business going for you.

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