Anonymous hurtful and extremely personal attack on facebook

[Yorkiedoodle]

Afternoon!
3 years ago I recommended I solicitor to someone who had put up a post asking for experiences on a mums Facebook group. Regrettably as the separation was fresh I also said something along the lines of “I hope she’s good!”

Today, I receive a notification from an anonymous poster. They have written some very personal things about me, accusing me of cheating, trying to take him for every penny (and not being happy with what I got) weaponising my daughter (we have her 50/50). Using my new partner’s money to go on holiday, as well as other things. None of which are true but she’s put so much detail in that it’s wild. TBF we have just come home from Malaysia (which my partner and I split equally).
The group admin have ignore my requests to tell me who is throwing these accusations around and I am extremely upset.
i have an extremely happy life since my separation, i enjoy my job, love to travel and my daughter seems to be doing really well at school and with extra curricular pursuits. Why would someone come after me like this, three years later.

No, she didn’t?

Either my ex husband has been sharing intimate details of our divorce settlement with people I don’t know or it’s himself/his GF. As so many of you have pointed out, who else would care at all when we broke up three years ago.

Its going to forever be a mystery I think, as the person is highly unlikely to admit to it, although it’s not like I’m going to accuse is gf to her face. I’ve never actually met her.

I hate to think this is how a woman would speak to another woman (I’m a girls girl through and though) but my partner tells me I am being naive. It’s most definitely is not is sister or mother, they don’t have the best of literacy skills and these messages I was sent are very well written.

Why can't you do this op? You can unblock again after if you want but seems like genius.

because I do not know her Facebook page, I think she doesn’t use her real name as she is a teacher.

You'll probably be able to find hers from his though, they'll be friends on FB.

I would respond using the laughing emoji and/or respond saying, 3 years later and still causing this much angst, she was definitely worth it 🤣. No one is going to take someone who drudges up a 3 years post seriously, they look mental.

I know it must be hurtful to have someone attack you like this out of the blue & I don’t think it will do any good to respond to them. Think of it this way, it’s been 3 years, and now this coward decides to shout out baseless and untrue accusations at you? She’s pathetic and you shouldn’t concern yourself with the rantings of a cowardly loser.

Take a look at Mel Robbins new book: Let Them. It sounds passive on the surface but if you read her theory, it makes a lot of sense. Let them, then let me.
I'm not being disrespectful here, but look at how much power WE have all given to this anonymous FB poster, plus all of your time it has taken from thinking about it, posting about it here & then replying to this post.
Protect your energy & your peace. You've moved on. Don't give this person another moment of your time or energy.

Block and delete

Block her and move on. Don’t give this any more time and energy.

What’s the betting your ex has thoroughly distorted what he’s told her, to provoke that much outrage ?

I feel a bit mortified for him, I can’t imagine my partner sending my ex husband abusive messages on a public forum.

Reply saying you'll be consulting your excellent solicitor again to determine if any of the comments posted constitute slander

Either it's his GF, or he's having an affair, and it's the new affair partner (hence why now, rather than back then)

You just have to let it go. My DH got massively slandered on a Facebook post, (didn’t name him but it was definitely him, he got an apology from the group leader but no retraction or removal of post) people were just awful about him and it was all bollocks, nothing criminal just character defamation which really stung, but I couldn’t retaliate because I knew there would be such a pile on if I did and I didn’t want to risk it. Just ignore and move on. (It still stings ten years on, but I couldn’t do anything about it. So I do my best to shrug it off)

You seem to have decided what I would recommend - don't feed the trolls! It's hard not to respond, but doing so almost always makes things worse.

Under the post add something like “jealousy and false information”