Be honest, how do you feel when somebody tells you they’re going on holiday on their own?

[Zippityjumpingbean]

So, I suppose this is vaguely inspired by the thread about the lady volunteering at a festival in her van, also inspired by the fact that I have just booked my first Solo holiday in 14 years (since before DC were born) I’m ridiculously excited about it and I love holidaying alone but the first person I told about about it I got the sympathetic head tilt and “I’m sure you’ll still have fun though”

So , be honest, if you hear about somebody holidaying alone how does it make you feel?
Do you honestly feel a bit sad/sorry for them even if you don’t voice it?

I don't feel sorry for them at all - I'm deeply impressed by their confidence and spirit of adventure, and I start wondering if I have it in me to do the same.

Have a fantastic holiday!

I think it would depend. If they wanted to have someone to go with them but didn’t have anyone to go with I would feel for them. But if they were happy to go on their own I would think well done them and I wish I had the confidence to do that

It's like marmite, isn't? You're not going to get someone with an indifferent view on the issue.

I loved going away on my own and in my 20s would book last minute trips and long weekends on my own etc. I also enjoy holidaying with my partner. I do not enjoy holidaying with my toddler.

I wouldn't think anything bad, but obviously there are people out there who can't fathom CHOOSING to be alone, so they think you're a billy no mates 🤣

Have a fab time!

I had my first solo holiday last year at the age of 60.

I loved it, and would definitely do it again.

This year I'm going away with a friend, but next year...who knows 🙂

Ive been on holiday myself and felt a bit sorry for myself too

I don't feel anything, why would I?

And certainly no envy as my DC are adults and I can go on holiday alone anytime I want.

It's just not my thing, but each to their own 🤷‍♂️

This is a weirdly complicated one for me

this will be long, sorry

I have mixed feelings about holidays - watch the episode of Miranda and there I am - but in the past I went away on my own and really enjoyed it.

However, now I really don't. I think it's because I used to have lots of friends so my home time I could hang out with loads of people. Now I can't. So going away alone doesn't feel like a break from anything.

Also, I think going away has become so incredibly expensive, it doesn't feel worth it. I now live in a nice place too, so I'm not bursting to run away from London anymore, which is good news.

I don't mind going away alone for work.

A further thought - I think people in general have changed a lot. I am used to chatting to anybody and everybody, but now I think the social etiquette is you are supposed to be glued to your phone and if you dare to chat to anyone in the hotel bar, you are a total weirdo.

edit, sorry I haven't actually answered your question. I'm not sure. I do feel envious that some people are that self-sufficient but I'd be more envious of someone who has friends they can go away with.

I LOVE holidays on my own. Not done it since I met DH and I really need to start doing it again.

envious! Not jealous, just wish I could do that again. I am really pleased for them. A work colleague just left to go travelling on her own for a few months. I think it’s a wonderful thing to be able to do. I have travelled on my own in the past. It can be lonely but also liberating.

I feel awe. I’d love to do it.

I got the sympathetic head tilt and “I’m sure you’ll still have fun though”

Many, MANY, people, especially women in my experience, simply cannot comprehend doing things alone. Thing like what was said are not reflection on you, but the person saying it. Especially since you are excited!

Women are generally underestimating other women imho. DH worked abroad for 6 months, the amount of horrified "omg aren't you scared being at home alone?", "but what if something breaks when he is gone?" 😱 from women was unreal. Women live by themselves just fine in real life like women go on holidays themselves and have fun in real life!

You are just deviating from what many people know, do, and think should be norm, and so you will get some weird reactions.

Enjoy your holidays!

I don't think I've known anyone to go on holiday alone, so not sure.

If they want to go to get away from family etc then that would be different to a widow that has no friends to go with. Also different if it was a specific, solo holiday cruise/all inclusive place they were going to to meet other solo travellers.

Interesting, it did make me stop and think but no, on the whole a don’t think I do think that.
I read the van lady thread and wondered if the colleague actually thought she and her dd were doing the lady a favour by keeping her company.

If you are excited about it then it’s a shame your friend couldn’t see that and be happy for you.,Haven’t been on a proper holiday for a few years (family illness and work getting in the way). So currently I live vicariously through my friends’ holidays!

Ooh, where are you going OP. Believe me travelling solo is the best thing ever! That's not to say that travelling with family/friends/partner etc. is awful, it's just different. And no, I don't feel sorry for anyone going alone, I think "good on you" and more women should try and do it at least once. Then the bug bites and....you can't wait to do it again!

I travel on my own once a year, maybe twice. First time was daunting, but I enjoy it so much now. I go to places the only I would be interested in and the freedom is terrific.

I’d think ‘you’re going to have the best time!’

I’ve been on holiday by myself loads of times. Lying by the pool / on the beach reading and watching the world go by with zero demands on my time is one my life’s greatest pleasures.

ETA I once stayed at a hotel where an organised ‘solo travel’ group were staying. They and their Rep could not fathom why I was there on my own, nor why I didn’t want to join them for dinner, excursions etc. I had to get pretty stern with them that I wanted to be alone!

Envious! I love DH and DS and we have great holidays, but if I had spare time and money I'd go somewhere warm, read a book or 4, drink nice wine and coffee, have a wander about, visit some galleries, go to bed early, get up late, all by myself. Absolute Bliss.

There's an older woman I work with who has started solo holidaying largely because her husband is a curmudgeonly arse who's held her back for too long, she's been to India, Cambodia, Vietnam, Japan, sometimes on an organised trip (India) sometimes one that she's organised herself. She's quite quiet and a bit timid and when she told me she was doing these trips I thought good for you and I respect her doing something she wants to do, that's probably taken a bit of bravery on her part.

Total envy. I frequently go away on my own and LOVE it. I don't have to consider anyone else's wants, wishes or needs. It's bloody great.

Holidaying alone wouldn’t be for me but if someone chooses to holiday alone my presumption is that it makes them very happy, so I’d be very happy for them.

I feel pretty envious to be honest! 😁

I have been on 6 solos holidays. I loved them. In a group so you had company if you wanted but could please yourself. For the last few years I've been going with a single friend to save money. It's OK but TBH, I preferred the solo holidays!

I know this doesn't answer your question. I got a lot of head tilts too. Fuck 'em.

I don’t feel sorry for them, nor do I feel envious, but I do feel impressed/baffled by their desire to holiday alone. My DP has more annual leave than I do, and his kids are grown up, so he often finds himself with a few days to kill. Once or twice a year he’ll go away somewhere in the UK for a couple of days on his own. He’s quite happy, chats to anyone but is fine on his own too. I find it strange because I’d hate it, but I certainly don’t pity him.

Depending on the holiday I'd either be envious or think it's not for me. Either way, I'd be impressed with someone doing it because I know a lot of people find the idea terrifying. When I was younger, I wouldn't have. Now I totally would, but not possible with finances, kids, DH etc. Maybe when I'm older though - I love the idea of taking myself off for a city break somewhere completely alone.

In this case DC’s dad (not DH) is taking them away at the same time and they actively didn’t want to go on a second holiday in the same summer because they need time to “hang out” with their mates.
so no guilt in this case, but yes guilt has put a stop to my solo holidays for the last 14 years so it is a factor.

I guess it would depend on how it's presented and the person's circumstances. I mainly holiday alone and sometimes it's great but at other times I'd prefer to have company. I'd possibly be a bit miffed at that kind of reaction, especially if they were in any way smug about it.