Partner has baby blues - due in 2 months

[livealittlex]

So when I met my current partner I was pregnant, he chose to step up- and want to be this boys dad as the real father cheated and moved country, I'm 2 months from my due date and my partner has baby blues about it not being his, how do I help reassure him?

You've only been together a few months so it's understandable that he isn't sure about taking on a child that isn't his. After such a short time, how can you both be sure that you want to commit to each other as partners, let alone parents?

He isn’t having doubts about being a dad, he loves the idea and it’s his biggest dream, but he is a first time parent and I already have a toddler.

He is just worried

I don’t think you can. You need to put your unborn child first and put some distance between you and this guy. If he is having doubts already then it isn’t going to work. Concentrate on your baby.

How long have you even been together? Can't be more than what, six months? It all just sounds very rushed. Getting your head round having a baby is quite a big deal and if he's got cold feet it's probably better he goes now than once your child has bonded with him.

What sort of reassurance do you think he needs exactly?

He’s already sad. When the baby is here and no one’s slept I can’t imagine it’s going to feel much better for him.
Youve not been together long, it’s madness to make this new partner your baby’s ‘dad’
plan to do it alone and if he sticks around, great.

Please tell me you have not moved a man you've known for around four months in with you and your toddler daughter?

We got past the only going on dates phase and we feel comfortable in our relationship, the relationship isn’t the issue.

He just needs some reassurance and I think he’s worried about being a dad as it’s his first time

I'd imagine your toddler is going to need a lot of reassurance - a new man moved in super quick and next a new baby.

How soon into your relationship did this man move in with you?

You have got a toddler whose the father ?
you’re pregnant that father has left is he the father of the toddler ? You’ve moved in a man to your home with your toddler and you’re pregnant to another man ? What have I just read

Yes. More than the "dad" who isn't the father of either of them.

Was he just looking for somewhere to live @livealittlex?

Exactly what you wrote! Unfortunately.

Should be easy as he isnt the dad.

also, what the fuck are you thinking?

this is extremely reckless behaviour. You need to talk to your midwife and tell her you have moved a strange man in with you and your toddler, are calling him dad, and he is already sad about it.

He isn’t having doubts about being a dad, he loves the idea and it’s his biggest dream.

Yeah, right.

Presumably your toddler is already calling him daddy.

Please tell me this isn’t true

It astounds me the lengths women go to to put men before their children.

My toddler sees her dad still, no issues with him

Where’s Jeremy Kyle
this is just a bloody mess put your children first and live on your own. The biggest risk to a child is an unrelated man in their home

No my toddler has a dad 🤦🏼‍♀️

My midwife is well aware and is very supportive of him stepping up, thank you!

How does he feel about a strange man, possibly the second, living wirh his todddler daughter?

Hahahhahshhahahha

no they are not.

How old are you ? You’ve got a 2 year old one father a baby another father and a new bf is this normal to you ?

I didn’t think these sorts read Mumsnet!

Easy, he isn’t the dad. You sack him off and focus on your toddler and incoming baby. Then I really do think you should go and get some counselling to figure out why you are putting random men above the needs of your children.