Ridiculous things customers say!

[Darkclothes]

I was in an Italian restaurant today in the UK. The menu was in English. The woman at the next table asked the waiter if the prawns were cooked! He said yes of course they are. She then said that it didn't specify on the menu- it just said 'King prawns with baby tomatoes in a creamy sauce'.

The waiter then said, well it doesn't specific that the chicken is cooked- but most people realise it is. DH and I starting laughing to ourselves. It made me wonder, what other bonkers things have you heard customers say?

To be fair I can see the attraction, especially if you are bought a post-coital snack. Who doesn't love a Big Mac?

Service station worker here 👋

the things I have seen would turn your stomach. Customers have threatened us so many times

Oh I get this all the time! Usually why have you told the banks my relative has died, I can’t access their accounts now!? Errr because you’ve employed us to wind up their estate, how else do you think we can do it if we don’t contact the banks?

I work a large company and one day I answered the phone to hear a man say ‘oh ffs does no one speak fucking English anymore!’ I’m Scottish with a Scottish accent but my first language is English! Another man accused my colleague of ‘hating the English!’ She said ‘well my husband is English and I’ve put up with him for 32 years’

Wouldn't happen with my hairdresser, she refuses point blank to do anything that won't suit you, she says nobody is leaving her salon looking a state ( her words) She is fantastic.

One of my rabbits has a different surname. She was adopted and I've kept in touch with her old owners, so I've 'let her keep her surname'. And typing this out to admit it seems even more ludicrous than the actual itself. Lol

Can I get a raise then?

That’ll be why then, thanks!

Poor child being conceived in a McDs toilet! I bet there are 00s of others

You get prawn ceviche. They’re not cooked but not grey either.

When told it’s gluten the breadcrumbs in ham is different apparently.

People like that are why catering staff get complacent and end up spiking people like me.

Ophelia Phish?

A woman screaming for a refund on her child’s £1 bar of chocolate because it wasn’t the price the thought it was. I felt so sorry for the little girl who was no older than 5 or 6.

A US customer told me she was friends with Kate Middleton and Kate would be her lawyer in court when she sued us. This was because she couldn't figure out how to subscribe to emails.

"Hot" isn't a synonym for "cooked".

My sister gave someone a bloody good laugh a few years back. she wanted to hire a skip and the chap she phoned was going through her options - 1 tonne, 3 tonne, etc

she asked him "how much does a 3 tonne skip hold?"

She said he went silent for a moment then slowly said "three tonnes"

Obviously she was thinking about number of bin liners, or white goods etc, not weight.

I used to work in a tiny shop on the corner of a mediaeval street and a cathedral green. Every few days we would get someone come in asking where the cathedral was. It was that vast lump of stone blotting out the light.

You'd be disciplined for saying that if reported

But you can't sue someone for this that's the difference

Not all analogue clocks tick. Some sweep.

Exactly. Such a stupid rule if it can’t be enforced.

Its not about stopping someone overdosing a business doesn't care about that they care about being sued. If someone wants to make the choice to go to multiple shops and buy multiple packs of paracetamol and take an overdose they have every right to do so. But when someone dies of an overdose the first thing a family is going to do is look for blame and that would be placed on a shop worker and a business if they sold someone hundreds of paracetamol

There’s a joke in there somewhere! Perhaps she was attracted by his Big Mac!

From chat GpT - I promise you they were raw!!

Yes, both Spain and Italy have dishes that feature raw prawns, especially in coastal regions where seafood is fresh and high quality.
• Spain: In high-end restaurants and seafood markets, gambas rojas (red prawns) are often eaten raw or lightly dressed with olive oil and sea salt. This is especially popular in areas like Catalonia and Andalusia.
• Italy: In southern Italy, particularly in Sicily, Puglia, and along the Amalfi Coast, raw prawns (often gamberi rossi di Mazara del Vallo) are a delicacy. They are typically served with a drizzle of extra virgin olive oil, lemon, and sometimes burrata or citrus zest.

Both countries emphasize the freshness of the prawns, as raw seafood must be of top quality to be safe and delicious.

See message above - completely RAW