Dh doesn't cook. Am I being unreasonable?

[1newname]

Me and dh have been together for over 20 years. I've always done almost all the cooking. I was a stay at home mum for 8 years so during this time I was happy to do it and seemed fair as dh was working. However, when I started working nothing changed. Over the years, we've had many conversations about me not wanting to be the only one that cooks. He'll make an effort for a few weeks then it goes back to normal.

I'm fed up. I do all the meal planning, online shop and cooking. He does a sport twice a week and I resent the fact that he can just swan off without thinking about it. I have to try and think of what to cook that will fit in to the time I have. He's a good husband in many ways but it feels so sad that I have to worry about everyone else eating but no one gives a shit about me.

My mother was an absolute slave to cooking for my father. She wouldn’t go anywhere if it meant she wasn’t home for his mealtimes, and if she had to be out of the house, she’d prepare his food before she went.

If the house was about to go up in flames, her biggest worry would be what he’d have for dinner.

Then she became disabled overnight. The day after she got sick, he bought an airfryer and started cooking for himself.

I’ve never known a man who will allow himself starve to death.

Well, he'd have to either cook or starve if you didn't do it.

I'd just stop cooking for him until he got the point and pulled his finger out. Ridiculous that a grown man doesn't have basic life skills; doesn't even have to be fancy, surely he can follow a basic recipe for spaghetti bolognese, or piece together a salad with some protein and boiled potatoes.

He'll either get bored of eating toast and cereal (if he can "make" them...) while you eat a nice dinner, and get his act together, or show how truly lazy he is and continue to live off shit. Either way, at least you don't have to cook for a giant man baby.

Surely you can say you're not cooking on yoga night and ask them all to sort themselves out? Once they're used to that you could suggest a rota between the 4 of you. You'll be helping them all out in the long run.