Who's "your person"?

[BigJanette]

I've been ill so have been comfort watching the earlier series of Grey's Anatomy.

“You're my person” is a line from the TV show Grey's Anatomy that describes the close relationship between Meredith Grey and Cristina Yang. The phrase conveys the idea that someone is there for you, no matter what, and that you understand each other without needing to explain yourself.

My person (outwith of family) is a friend I've known for 23 years and counting.
We're both very silly but we "get" each other.
She called me at 6.30am last week to ask which colour carpet should she go for?
I, still more asleep than awake, said "What???! When do you need to decide by?"
She said "Ermm... this morning".
I know, it's a definite "you had to be there" moment but it just illustrates the fact she felt absolutely fine with calling at that time about something so inconsequential 😄

Do you have a person?

That is so sweet, OP.

My children, my boyfriend and (I know it's unconventional but also my exH).

My husband. He's the person who knows me better than anyone else does. And we make each other laugh a lot, more so than anyone else can make us laugh. Shared sense of humour can make you feel very bonded to someone.

No one now. It was equally my dad and my OH, they both understood my weird sense of humour and fully got who I was as a person and never made me feel less than for my disabilities.

They died within a few weeks of each other at the start of 2024

I did, yes, and 15 years on I still miss her dearly. But I'm very lucky with DH, my mum and a few other dear friends, all of whom I can count on.

My DD. We absolutely get each other. She will phone and we will ask what have you been doing and both reply nothing. Then chat for hour about nothing at all. Always lots of laughing as we resolve what is wrong with the world (people).

My husband and my mum. I can relate to the carpet thing completely 😂

Jesus, I’m so very sorry 💐💐💐

Myself and dh are trying to work out whether to stay together and I asked him how he felt about me one night. He said of course he loves me and I said no, I don’t mean that. He said you mean are we still each others person. And neither of us said anything because that’s the problem. We don’t know anymore. My sister and best friends know something is wrong with me before it is and totally get me (as did dh previously!)

My dad was too. A legend!

Dh and ds1. I also have two very good friends.

My husband and my younger sister.

I'm very close to my older sister and my brother but my younger sister (by a year) is more like my twin.

I just lost my friend of 60 years - we'd known each other since nursery, went through schools etc together. Always kind, a text pretty much every day or two, never forgot a birthday or anniversary. I'm shocked at how much a hole it's left in my life, because I've no-one to text or phone about the mundane.
I luckily do still have DH who I've known 50 years almost, so that's OK.

And I've a friend I've known since I was 23, who despite only exchanging a phone call for birthdays/Christmas is one of the few I could just phone any time day or night and they'd be there.
I did once meet someone in another company on a work project - we had never met before - and had two days to put something together and we quickly established we completely understood each other and the entire gist of the project, but also could take an idea forward without needing to be saying much as we both understood exactly what needed doing and cracked on, so we actually finished the whole thing including going through to make sure it worked, all on the first day, and when we stopped we both said 'wow, that was weird' at the same moment, because it was very weird to find the idea you were having about how to do x so you get y result was the same as someone else was realising at the same time and you didn't have to waste time to explain your thoughts, if anything they came back with something to polish the plan. It was almost as though we'd met and done that sort of thing before, the guy who introduced us clearly thought we'd get on, but even he was amazed when he got the finished project a lot earlier than expected, still remains as the weirdest work day I ever had.

My DH. I even made him watch Grey’s Anatomy with me and at one point he squeezed my hand and said ‘you’re my person’.
It sounds cliche but we are best friends as well as spouses. I think that relationships that also have a foundation in friendship are (most of the time) more successful.

Had one, married him, lost him. Will never have another. Hug your persons tightly everyone.

Off-topic, but I know that Meredith/Cristina thing is always brought up as some kind of mark of 'ride or die' friendship -- from what I remember, though, she said 'You're my person' in the context of having had to put down an emergency contact when she had a termination during season 1, when the two of them barely knew one another except in the context of being fellow-interns.

Telling a new colleague you've put them down as emergency contact for a medical procedure sounds to me to be actually more about how few people you have in your life longterm than anything else.

(Realise this wasn't actually the point of the post.)

Yes I remember that quote from Grey's and it struck me at the time too. Sadly, I don't have a person. I am autistic and friends tend to dump me after a while. I think it is because I am very intolerant of anything I consider factually incorrect or unfair. So, previous best friend was an anti-vaxxer and didn't believe in climate change and I told her numerous times she was mistaken. There were numerous other things too. She didn't appreciate me pointing these things out and I am unable not to point them out.

I'm really so sorry!

--

I don't have anyone, not fully. I have good friends but no one that is my person.

Yes agree re the initial usage but it became a recurring comment that carried additional weight as their friendship grew iywkim.

In fairness, I think most NT people wouldn't tolerate that kind of nonsense either.

I did. She died 15 months ago. It's a weird feeling when you realise again and again you can't call.

She and I were friends

Other than my husband it’s my two friends I’ve had since primary school. One lives nearby and is always there for anything, a chat, help or full blown crisis. That actually extends to her family as well, my mum died of cancer during lockdown and she couldn’t get here. Her parents were straight round, lockdown be dammed, with support, comfort and even the offer of financial help if we needed it for the funeral.

My other ‘person’ lives a few hours away but she‘s my emotional support. I have moments where things can feel really overwhelming and she’s the one I phone, she has had her own mental health issues and can give some really good perspective on things. Which isn’t to say my local friend couldn’t or wouldn’t, but far away friend is my first phone call in those situations. She also has some issues with her family, I offer advice to her with those where I can and have even been her emergency contact when she had a mental health crisis a couple of years ago and ended up in hospital. She’s coming to visit in a few weeks and I’m so excited to see her.

My bestie. We've known each other for more than thirty years. We had dinner together just last night. I love her dearly and would do anything for her. We holiday together and we have the best time. We're on a countdown at the mo, only four months to go. I feel extremely fortunate to have her. She also gives the best hugs.

My sister. We formed a bubble in 2020 and she's been my rock ever since. She's amazing.

My dad. Just because. Years of being there. Love him to death.

Also a friend from school I've known since I was 12. She doesn't judge and has a heart of absolute gold.

My husband, always has my back but doesn't let me get away with too much rubbish.

My parents were like this, especially when I was an adult.

I'm so sorry @DoAWheelie and @Ariela for your losses x 💐

@stayathomer I hope you figure things out 💐

ETA - I'm so sorry @Enko 💐

All of these are so touching to read, thanks for sharing everyone.