Inconsequential things people say that ^really^ disproportionately and irrationally piss you off.

[JanetSaysYouGotTidyHair]

My mum jokingly calls me a "tight arse" and it really, really makes me want to throw things. I'm not a tight arse. I love Iceland Food Warehouse. I love charity shops. I love Savers. I love vinted. I love a bargain. None of this makes me a tight arse.

Another one is concerning my home office which is in a converted outhouse in my garden. It make me absolutely murderous when people ask "Isn't it cold?" like I didn't employ a professional builder, didn't get it fully insulated, didn't get good heating installed.

Both of these things happened today. And my period unexpectedly arrived. I want to throw things and hurt people.

Tell me what other completely inane, inconsequential things people say that make you want to throw things and hurt people.

Mumsnetters typing "Hard agree".

It seems like everyone's jumping on that bus and it makes me irrationally angry.

My thread pet hate is "Without further ado". Just why? Why bother adoing in the first place? Just say what's needed and get it adone.

"Simples".

Absolutely rage-inducing. Our local Facebook group is full of it. I'm not sure why it grates so much. Smugness around intellect, but often preceeded by nothing that makes them look particularly bright?

I was just thinking how nice it is that none of my friends say it, THEN ONE OF MY FRIENDS INCLUDED IT IN HER MESSAGE. I can't respond until I've calmed down 😄

Also see "a cheeky [insert something that isn't cheeky at all, because we're adults and can do what we like]".

And "drama llama".

I promise I'm a nice person, really!

"It is what it is"
"Taking ownership"
"Proven track record"
"No offence but ..." immediately followed by something extremely offensive.

I went to a very small university college that specialised (highly!) in my performing arts subject. When people asked where I'd gone to uni and I told them, a huge number would say "oh I've NEVER heard of it." Made me feel so worthless and I couldn't believe they didn't realise their rudeness.

Anyone describing themselves as an "empath." They're usually the least empathetic people imaginable.

I secretly judge people who say ‘can I get’ when ordering.

”I don’t disagree..”

just say you agree!

Actually most of these phrases don’t bother me…!

What does piss me right off is when I hear someone compliment a previously big person for losing weight by saying “you look amazing” - which actually means “you looked like shit before”. This person is still the same human being! I’m amazed more people aren’t offended but people seem to take the ‘compliment’ well despite it being a massively rude insult to my ears. 🤷🏻‍♀️

It might be me but I don't get it. Do they also say "soft agree"? I mean you either agree with something or you don't.

When my DM says "never mind!" in response to a horrible thing happening. Made redundant? Never mind! Miscarriage? Never mind! Long term relationship ending? Never mind!

When DH says "we'll have to work out how to do X." For example, he was given a Gourmet voucher for Christmas. It is a simply a voucher that you can use against the cost of a meal in selected restaurants. He said, "we'll have to work out how to use it." Literally nothing to "work out", just choose a restaurant and book! It's pure procrastination and drives me doolally.

When DMIL shortens or changes words or phrases for no reason. For example, nappies becomes napkins, Happy Christmas becomes Happy Crippy, baby becomes babe.

DH has taken to saying "right?" at the end of sentences. 😣

I accept I'm utterly irrational in my responses here and I love these people dearly, but 😡.

YouTubers say this all the time. "Without further ado!" and then proceed to do lots more "ado-ing"!

Put the baby down drowsy but awake.

Thanks for the amazing advice that I’ve definitely never tried and which definitely doesn’t result in my child howling like a demon.

Ah, but “I don’t disagree” is British for “I disagree on a cellular level and I’m about to break it down for you just how stupid that idea is, but I’m phrasing it politely”. It’s not agreeing!

“Everyone’s a little bit autistic!”

No, they aren’t

“I don’t know what s/he has to be depressed about!”

Do you say that about other illnesses or medical conditions?

“Not working today then?” anytime you’re not sat at your desk staring at a screen. Often, said because you’ve answered your front door and the person asking is the one that knocked…!

“You look well” my FIL says this everytime I see him, even after I just gave birth and looked an absolute mess having had a difficult delivery.

“Will you be in?” When I’m working from home and have made that clear as though being at home makes it acceptable to
drop by at anytime, for any purpose.

“You’ve lost some weight” what they mean is you were looking awfully fat.

"You just cope so well..." or "You're so strong"

Well I don't really have any fucking choice. Had you been remotely realistic in the promises you made to a dying relative then I wouldn't fucking have to be because the situation wouldn't have gone tits up and I wouldn't be the one having to try and pick up the pieces while juggling my own child's move toward end of life care.

Very specific I know.

More generally I absolute hate "Is there a bus due?"

"No Mr, I just thought I'd stand here by the side of the road, in the pissing rain, with these three other people for shits and giggles..."

Or my child is SEN

Yes this and also "I'm a bit OCD like that". Liking cleaning isn't OCD. And, while we're at it, OCD is something you have, not something you are.

Any email that starts with 'a gentle reminder'. It's still a reminder. Saying it's 'gentle' doesn't make it so. Makes me feel murderous, ironically.

A symposium in the sea where they all wear concrete boots?

"and off the back of that I'd like to add" no, don't. It's fucking grating.

That “yeah?” sounds like the same thing as the Antipodean Interrogative. Drives me insane. Along with people who start with “I mean” before they’ve even started their spiel.

People who say 'right' after a sentence.

'It's cold today, right'

Arghhhhhh! Stop assuming I'm going to agree with you, makes me want to disagree with them even if it is fucking cold. 'No, Dave, I think it's mild for this time of year'

I've got a customer who does this in meetings and it gives me the rage!

People using anything like Tourette's, ADHD, or OCD as a self-depreciating joke (I'm autistic and I have ADHD).
No Sandra, you're not "a little bit autistic" because you like your towels folded a certain way, nor are you "being a bit ADHD" when you get distracted mid-conversation. OCD isn't all fun and games and an extremely clean house, and Tourette's isn't a bloody joke for the people who actually have it.

Other than that, my current inconsequential one is "complicate" in academic texts, and I don't even know why it bothers me.
Unfortunately my annoyance is complicated by the fact that it's a useful way to phrase things and I often use it myself.

Commenting on any pregnant woman's bump by saying anything at all, just DO NOT do it.