Boyfriend said that i wanted to be sexually abused when i was younger ?!

[crazybbabyysb]

Hey everyone feeling a little down a little back story I'm 24 now however when I was around 12-14 I was sexually abused by a older person he was around 20 he didn't rape me but he took advantage of me yes I really liked the guy but now as I'm
Older I should have said something to my mum or anyone

Anyway I've decided to tell my boyfriend he said that I clearly wanted it because I didn't let anyone know I said to him do you understands what it means to be groomed but somehow hes saying that me and the guy is both wrong kind of making me want to break up with him over it am I over reacting ?

Get rid he is a cunt. I’m so sorry that happened to you and it definitely wasn’t your fault!

Another poster saying to get rid. The lack of empathy and blaming a child for being abused is inexcusable. So sorry that happened op(both the abuse and his shocking response)

Please leave this awful man immediately. He has a warped attitude to child sex abuse.

I'm so sorry for what you went through

This kind of mentality is alarming. If he thinks that's ok, wouldn't be surprised if he's a predator himself tbh. Get well rid!

I am sorry the abuse happened to you. You were a child. Get rid of your boyfriend

Leave your “boyfriend” fast, before he fucks you up. He is a terrible person with awful beliefs and he will hurt you by forcing these beliefs on you.

Further to the earlier message.... and consider reporting that older male to police

🚩🚩

Run don't walk away from this man

Make sure you have absolutely no form of contact with him after you do break up.

You really need to ask whether to leave a victim-blaming misogynist?

Is he your first proper boyfriend? Could he be just ignorant? Boys have wet dreams. Girls don't. What happened to you was child abuse. He needs to educate himself fast

I feel like he will use this info to throw back in your face in future arguments, he doesn't sound good. Get rid off

This.

Get rid.

Very disturbing view of your abuse.

I’m so sorry that you were abused in this way and that someone you trusted to share this with has reacted in this way.

Dump and to be honest I don’t think I would even bother with the courtesy of a text message to let him know, I’d just ghost him. What a fuckwit.

That is how people used to think, the victim was blamed even if she (or he) was a child.

The fact is that a girl of 12-14, as you were, is not capable of consent. She may have romantic fantasies and a 'crush' on an adult chap but it is up to him not to take advantage of that. Someone so young is not emotionally equipped to cope with such a relationship, it's exploitative and damaging..

Your boyfriend needs educating. I feel annoyed on your behalf, he is victim blaming. It's akin to saying a beaten wife 'asked for it' (that was often thought back in the day). How old is he by the way?

Get rid of him, there are better people out there.

DUMP the prick fast and hard 🚩🚩

end the relationship with the drop kick boyfriend. He has zero knowledge of what he's talking about having never been in that type of situation before. He is a loser

Education or dump

He's saying that an adult and a child are equally culpable for a child's abuse. WTF. Not a safe person OP.

Why should the OP be responsible for educating him when she is already traumatised?

She should dump him and tell him why. That's sufficient education.

he said that I clearly wanted it because I didn't let anyone know

Eurgh, what a vile piece of shit. Sounds like something Andrew Tate would say.

@crazybbabyysb PLEASE get far far far away from him. You are not overreacting in the slightest.

Thank you to you all for making me realise that I'm not over reacting and he is a piece of shit I will be letting him go

Crying reading all of your messages I really thought maybe I was the one to blame I appreciate you all

Oh my god. Bin him off. How dare he!

Gosh no. You did nothing wrong. You were groomed by a vile man, who should have known better. You were twelve when this started. How on earth can your ‘boyfriend’ say this to you. Absolutely get rid. You’re being abused all over again.

All the red flags OP. I'm sorry this happened to you. Your bf response says to me he obviously likes to victim blame SA survivors. There's probably a whole other bunch of poor attitudes lurking too. Dump him.