Come and have a laugh at my ex husband of you need cheering up!

[Mydogisamassivetwat]

Ds was planning to visit his dad at some point over Christmas. Looking at trains last night, they were absolutely extortionate and for two days, inc 10 hour travel time, it wasn’t worth the price.

Ex h has gone mental. Sent me a text last night saying that as I chose to move so far away from him, it’s my responsibility, and I should bring ds to him for contact. I have to drive him or pay the train fare. He’s going to “take advice” on next steps.

Ds is 22 years old. Yes, twenty-two. Not two. A grown man.

Has his own job, didn’t know when his leave would be until last night so couldn’t plan in advance, and to be honest, he’s a grown arse adult who is working Christmas Day anyway and what he does with his free time and his money is no longer any of my business.

I am wondering on what these next steps will be? Solicitor, perhaps? Or maybe he will go for full custody? I mean, ds lives with his girlfriend now, so I presume it’s her he would take to court, not me? Or perhaps their landlord? Who knows!

Oh and I know I’ll get asked why he still has my contact details. It’s because, every so often, he will do something batshit like this and honestly, I find it hilarious. When ds was 18, he said he was going to court for full custody and was contacting solicitors as ds didn’t want to go to uni, so this is nothing new, the man is just a fucking idiot. I tell him to let me know how it goes and then ignore him.

I’d like to hear what these ‘next steps’ are 😂 😂

Do make sure you get every other weekend and a rebate on any maintenance you're paying when he gets full custody. We wouldn't want you to be out of pocket. 🤣

Me too, but I never will, sadly!

He’s so full of shit. He’ll pop back under his rock now until the the next time he feels like being a dickead.

Tell him that you have no age appropriate car seat so it’s impossible.

Also DS is teething so he might be a bit grumpy.

Pretending he'd lost your ds abroad and might have to call the police is pretty fucking bad in my book.

Yes, but ds doesn’t know about that.

This has given me insight into how incredibly difficult it must be to be a solicitor practising family law.

It's still bad OP, even if he doesn't know. And maybe he's old enough to know the truth now?

To be honest I think you’re giving him more headspace than he deserves, even with your stock response. I think you need to end the cycle now.

I would probably reply that your son is 22 and doesn’t live with you, so he should discuss direct with son. And then block and delete.

I can’t see why in any case you need to have a direct line of communication with your ex. Unless you share younger kids.

Even if an emergency occurred, it seems likely your son would contact you direct.

Do you now the maddest thing about this?

We never went to court. Never had a custody arrangement. Ds lived with me and his dad saw him whenever he liked. That was it. No fighting over anything (we didn’t have anything material to fight over), it was all so easy, filled in divorce paperwork, he had an affair, didn’t deny it.

Then he went nuts.

I think it’s all still because I left him and that makes him look bad. It was like 15/16 years ago. Get over it.

I would love to see the custody hearing…. Sounds like a good sketch for a comedy show!!

Becuase it makes me laugh. Life’s short. Ds is an adult now; I don’t care. I just find it funny when he still acts like this.

And what would that achieve, apart from to hurt ds? It’s over now. His father was a dick to me, but I don’t want to put my son in a horrible position. I don’t care anymore.

aww bless your exh's foolish little brain. It won't let him comprehend!

My ex is similar. He's an eejit. Please keep this thread open for ongoing laughs 🤣🤣🤣

I agree, I dont get it either. I cant see whats so amusing that it would warrant contact with someone you need zero contact with, especially someone that had been so cruel over the years (pretending to have lost her Son multiple times!).

I would want to cut that contact at the first chance and stop giving them any of my time at all, not even for a stock response, its still more time than I would want to allow them.

Well. We are all different. I’ve moved on. I find his little moments of these bonkers behaviours over the years amusing. It’s not upsetting me, it’s not upsetting my son, (and no, I don’t tell him about things like this), so there’s no harm.

I bet he would never have asked for full custody when he was under 18 would he!

My friends ex did the ‘I want receipts for where my maintenance goes! You say you spend hundreds so prove it ’ So she did it. She bought his food, nappies etc separately the scanned all the receipts, she did a comparison re rent in her 2 bedroom flat v a 1 bedroom and half of the gas and electric. She presented it all in a folder with a breakdown…this month I spent £300 raising OUR son. Taking into account your £60 maintenance contribution you owe me £90 to settle half of the cost. My bank details are xx-xx-xx xxxxxxxx….he never asked again. *I can’t remember the exact figures as it was over a decade ago.

Needed a laugh today. My gs lived with me under a court order. He hated contact with his dad and paternal gps. They insisted on him going but then essentially ignored him over the weekend. I felt they had plenty of time to build a gòod relationship. Gs is now 21 and has a fiance.

When the court order ended they turned up at my home - not the collection venue - and insisted I hand him over. GS was 6ft tall and they wanted me to physically force him from his home.

At the same time his other grandparent was filming me on his phone. When I went indoors, he filmed me through the window.

I just dont get it op. But you are right to see the comedy value rather than silently fume. I would just respond " good luck with that...."

This is what makes me laugh most. There was no court, no custody. There was never any conversation around it when we split up, ds lived with me, he saw him when he wanted.

which is why it was so laughable when he started using it when he was older!

I agree. It serves no purpose to tell your ds.

My ex sounds very similar to yours in lots of ways. Went mad at me once for not letting him know there had been a half term. There was nothing stopping him from attaining that info for himself. Mine are in their twenties now so 99% of the communication is between them. My stock response after a while used to be a thumbs up emoji.

What’s he going for? Every other weekend and half of his sons annual leave should be spent at his 😂😂

OP I was going to say there was a similar thread ages ago about an 18 year old but presume it was your post!

I can’t stop laughing 😆

HA does he know the age of his own child? 😂😂😂😂😂

Reminds me of the absent dickhead dad messaging the mother of his son
”And how is my boy?”
Mum “He’s fine”
Dad “ Did he like the teddy bear I sent him”
Mum “ Yes he did. And by the way he’s a Major in the army now”