Ladies, do you ever got to a bar alone?

[SnowwDr0p]

You know like in the movies, they've had a terrible day so just head into a bar and order a drink then sit and play with it wistfully! Usually before a handsome stranger approaches bu that aside, I wondered, do people ever do that in real life? I certainly don't see lone women drinking in my town but wondered if it's maybe a city thing or is it just generally a movie thing?!

Yep all the time. I lived alone for a year so if I fancied a pint I had to go alone but I've been doing it since I was 18. I'm now 40.

Last time I was in the pub alone I had a few pints and practised my darts.

Yes - in fact I did last night after my friend got the baby s home and for an hour while I waited for my DH to pick me up

All the time, also love going to the cinema alone. I live in London and have never been approached by anyone but I am quite good at the Paddington stare just in case. Hotel bars are great but expensive and in the big chains no-one bars an eyelid. I'd be a bit more hesitant about a locals type pub, I tend to like a gastro pub or one with a very good wine list.

To be completely honest I’m not sure how a ‘bar’ is defined.

Before or during the interval of a performance - play, opera, concert, whatever, I generally order a G&T ‘at the bar’ - it’s just a normal part of the evening and not something distinct or noteworthy.

I love the theatre of seeing a drink being made in a cocktail bar, and how it deconstructs while I’m drinking it. I’m not particularly interested in making cocktails at home so I’m far more likely to drink them outside the house.

If I go into a pub it’s likely to be primarily for food, maybe at the end of a long walk, with drink as an adjunct. Being alone or in company makes no difference to what I might drink.

If I’m eating alone in a restaurant I’ll probably ask for the wine list and take the opportunity to try a glass of something unusual or unfamiliar.

None of these activities are done with any intention but to please myself. They require no conscious ‘confidence’ and it wouldn’t occur to me to wonder what other people might think of my presence there.

Yes, all the time. It’s a treat on my day off - take the dog to one of the two excellent local real ale pubs and have a decent pint and read a book. I’m single so if I never did stuff I wanted to do alone, I’d pretty much never do it.

I do a whole solo walking holiday every year, which I cherish. Even in tiny villages on a Greek island nobody seemed to be particularly surprised that I was eating or drinking alone. What surprised them was that I had walked there.

It's not armour, it's that I would get bored otherwise. Why would I go out for a drink and stare into space?

TBH if I am eating or drinking alone at home, I usually read a book as well

I nip across the road to wetherspoon on my own. Not sure that is the image you had in mind.

kiraric precisely, I read because I love it; take a book everywhere with me. And yes I also read whilst eating dinner!

Exactly, eading is just my default activity really, I always have a book on me.

This. I’m a 40 something woman, but call me lady, or even call me girl if you like, as long as it’s not in a condescending way.

l have Australian friends that always use “lady” and friends older than me that always refer to going out with the girls.

Not at home as I would always have someone to go with. But back in the day if I was working away I would absolutely do this Probably take a book and have dinner. Not just sit drinking whiskey and smoking like Beth in Yellowstone

Yes, often. I'm 60, have done it regularly enough since my 20s. Really enjoy having a drink, reading my book, by myself. No-one has ever looked at my twice.

The book is because I enjoy it, and I'd be bored without it (or these days my phone). It's not armour.

I do.

So what, though? Being with your own company in whatever situation is something you can work on. And whose vision of what you might be doing in a bar is more important -+ you, who know you’re there to read a book and have a drink, or some random?

I wouldn’t. And I don’t particularly like waiting for friends to turn up either. I agree with pps who’ve mentioned the weird male interest you get. These days I’d walk around the block rather than wait inside. I happily do all sorts of other stuff on my own.

It’s not armour, it’s my default mode. If I’m not doing something that actively precludes it, like swimming or cycling, I will be reading. I read and write for a living, I read in the bath and on public transport, and in pubs. Or in one nice old pub near where I lived for a while, I used to do the IT crossword by the fire, with or without the assistance of a couple of regulars if I got stuck.

Not for a while but I have done a lot, I sit and read

No never, I go to coffee shops alone but that's about it

I think the only scenario I can think of where I would go to a bar alone would be a hotel bar if I was away for work, or on holiday and people were going to join me later

Yes of course - bars, pubs, hotel bars, whatever. Why on earth should I exclude myself from normal life just because (a) I happen to be alone at that moment, and (b) happen to be a woman?

I've had some great evenings from going to a bar on my own, you never know who you will get chatting to.

Yes - I have done. I used to go to our local pub with a book and a glass of wine and wait for a friend to get off work.

Why do you care if strangers you've never met and will probably never see again think you've been stood up?