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Mum kept baby hidden in drawer for nearly 3 years !!

624 replies

benjaminjamesandgraham · 26/11/2024 18:44

Even Christmas day she was kept in a drawer - oh how can someone be so cruel
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c4gz1dv8ly2o

The drawer where the child was kept, open underneath a cream divan bed with a blanket inside showing where the girl lived for the first three years of her life.

Cheshire mother who kept her baby hidden in a drawer for three years jailed

Prosecutors say the girl had "never known daylight or fresh air" when she was found.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c4gz1dv8ly2o

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
SnackSnack · 26/11/2024 21:12

The poor, poor baby. I hope she is being treated well now.

I have a cleft lip and palate, was half starved by my mother and left to cry. My dad used to come home and find me starving in my cot. My grandparents moved in to help when people realised that my mother didn't like the tube feding methods they used in those days and was trying to feed me with the aid of a teaspoon. That was more than 40 years ago. I have always been small, weedy and have abandonment issues and that was only 3 or so months until my mouth was repaired.

Yet another example of how children with clefts are abused by their supposed caregivers. I can only imagine social stigma led this vile woman to keep a child hidden like that. She said in her defence that she was frightened. What a selfish creature.

SnugglyJumpersMakeItBetter · 26/11/2024 21:13

PeppaEffingPig · 26/11/2024 20:07

Would there be a small chance that this little girl could recover and go on to develop normally if she was given intense psychological input and was adopted by a loving, stable family?

No, none whatsoever. She will be severely damaged for the rest of her life.

Whatthechicken · 26/11/2024 21:14

adamduritzvocalchords · 26/11/2024 20:53

@Whatthechicken you seem really keen to think there is some social care failings here. Social workers I work with are working beyond their workload every day and doing amazing things. I don't believe social care has not recovered since Covid. They are fucking amazing and I see them going above and beyond every day in the worst circumstances often at the detriment of their own health. I don't see any failings beyond that mother. I hope all social workers, family support workers and foster caters were offered mental health support after dealing with this horrific case. As well as the children obviously.

Not at all. Certainly not keen (keen seems an emotive word to use) ! I used that as just an example. I wondered also if the mother was under MH services and it was possibly a failure there - the world was in turmoil and I can understand how it could have spun someone of their axis. Again, not excusing at all, but I feel like there is something off about the reporting. It’s so easy to label this woman as evil. She may well be, but there is also a possibility that other things were at play,I don’t feel that we have the full facts.

There are days were I should think my children’s birth parents must have been terrible people, and I should hate them, given the things my children have witnessed, the neglect they faced. But there were many other factors at play. I just think it’s important to look for any extenuating circumstances that may have contributed, understand those so we can stop it happening again.

I’m sure many social workers are doing an amazing job, I’m sure MH workers are doing an amazing hob, but the post adoption support for us definitely dried up after Covid - much like any other public service. I’m not blaming SS or MH services or the amazing people that work within, I’m blaming funding and the will of government - whether that was a factor here remains to be seen.

If you work within SS, MH services or the NHS - I doubt that you don’t have your own criticisms or suggestions of where improvements could be made.

Gloriia · 26/11/2024 21:15

@SnackSnack so sorry for what you endured Flowers.

BreatheAndFocus · 26/11/2024 21:15

Wintersgirl · 26/11/2024 20:51

I wonder why they don't just say partner then? Odd how it's being reported

I wonder whether that’s to conceal some fact? Perhaps at that stage he was no longer her partner? Perhaps he’s separated himself mentally from the woman because of what she did and so doesn’t want to be linked to her as her partner?

It doesn’t say but I wonder if she hid the baby because she knew her partner didn’t want a(nother) baby and/or worried he’d leave her? Or maybe the baby wasn’t his and so ‘wasn’t part of the family’, like she’s reported to have said. But that doesn’t explain why she didn’t just leave the baby somewhere to be found after she had been born. It’s almost like she’s punishing the child for being born.

As she sits in prison, walks around, watches TV, goes to the gym, does some education, I hope she thinks of her little girl who spent the first three years of her life shut in a drawer never going out, never meeting her siblings. If there was real justice, this woman would spend her sentence locked in her cell. But, no, because that would be cruel….

caffeineanddryshampoo · 26/11/2024 21:16

One of the worst cases I've ever heard. OH started reading it out to me earlier because we live in this county but I had to stop him because it's so horrendous.

Pluckolit · 26/11/2024 21:17

BreatheAndFocus · 26/11/2024 21:15

I wonder whether that’s to conceal some fact? Perhaps at that stage he was no longer her partner? Perhaps he’s separated himself mentally from the woman because of what she did and so doesn’t want to be linked to her as her partner?

It doesn’t say but I wonder if she hid the baby because she knew her partner didn’t want a(nother) baby and/or worried he’d leave her? Or maybe the baby wasn’t his and so ‘wasn’t part of the family’, like she’s reported to have said. But that doesn’t explain why she didn’t just leave the baby somewhere to be found after she had been born. It’s almost like she’s punishing the child for being born.

As she sits in prison, walks around, watches TV, goes to the gym, does some education, I hope she thinks of her little girl who spent the first three years of her life shut in a drawer never going out, never meeting her siblings. If there was real justice, this woman would spend her sentence locked in her cell. But, no, because that would be cruel….

Why are people assuming that this partner is even the father of the other children? The way ITV reported it he was just some random boyfriend, nothing to do with any of the kids.

DinnaeFashYerself · 26/11/2024 21:19

TheDowagerCountessofPembroke · 26/11/2024 20:11

Poor little soul. Would a cleft palette have shown up in a scan? Did she find out and then go into denial?

A cleft lip would show up on a scan, a cleft palate normally not.

and one is assuming she had scans - I suspect the entirely pregnancy was unmonitored.

onwardsup4 · 26/11/2024 21:21

Some people will literally find anything to argue about why are people arguing amongst each other on this thread.
Please, at least properly read the articles before posting. Awful terribly sad story. Poor child.

Dymaxion · 26/11/2024 21:22

No, none whatsoever. She will be severely damaged for the rest of her life.

Can I ask why ? Genuinely ? I appreciate she may need a lot of help during the rest of her childhood, but is there really no hope of her ever having a normal life ?

Tetchypants · 26/11/2024 21:23

Birdscratch · 26/11/2024 20:08

Whenever something truly horrendous like this happens, people are very quick to suggest mental health issues. They’re so reluctant to believe that people are capable of really appalling things.

They’re so reluctant to believe that women are capable of really appalling things.

If this had been a male parent there’d be calls to string him up and barely a mention of mental health issues. What that woman did is utterly indefensible.

nildesparandum · 26/11/2024 21:24

I switched the news off wen this came on.I could not bear it.
I only hope this s a isolated case.

Christwosheds · 26/11/2024 21:26

I am in tears now thinking of that poor tiny girl, how will she ever recover ? It’s beyond belief that a mother could do this full stop but while caring for her older children ? I can’t understand it. She could have given up the baby at birth, why, why do this terrible thing ?

Dogwarwick · 26/11/2024 21:26

My DH was reading the news and suddenly I realised he was in tears and he told me what he was reading.

Oh dear god that poor child.

Christwosheds · 26/11/2024 21:28

SnackSnack · 26/11/2024 21:12

The poor, poor baby. I hope she is being treated well now.

I have a cleft lip and palate, was half starved by my mother and left to cry. My dad used to come home and find me starving in my cot. My grandparents moved in to help when people realised that my mother didn't like the tube feding methods they used in those days and was trying to feed me with the aid of a teaspoon. That was more than 40 years ago. I have always been small, weedy and have abandonment issues and that was only 3 or so months until my mouth was repaired.

Yet another example of how children with clefts are abused by their supposed caregivers. I can only imagine social stigma led this vile woman to keep a child hidden like that. She said in her defence that she was frightened. What a selfish creature.

I am so sorry for what you went through as a little baby. Flowers

BreatheAndFocus · 26/11/2024 21:30

Pluckolit · 26/11/2024 21:17

Why are people assuming that this partner is even the father of the other children? The way ITV reported it he was just some random boyfriend, nothing to do with any of the kids.

Why are people thinking that the word “perhaps” means someone is saying that they believe something is true? Nobody knows all the facts here so people are making suggestions.

Pluckolit · 26/11/2024 21:31

DinnaeFashYerself · 26/11/2024 21:19

A cleft lip would show up on a scan, a cleft palate normally not.

and one is assuming she had scans - I suspect the entirely pregnancy was unmonitored.

Have you read any of the articles? It clearly said the woman says she did not know she was pregnant until she was in labour, ergo she had no scans.

Josie901 · 26/11/2024 21:31

Dymaxion · 26/11/2024 21:22

No, none whatsoever. She will be severely damaged for the rest of her life.

Can I ask why ? Genuinely ? I appreciate she may need a lot of help during the rest of her childhood, but is there really no hope of her ever having a normal life ?

There's research that a child's vocab at three has some correlation with later outcomes in life. I can't remember the details (nor who conducted it) so sorry it's vague. If vocabulary can make a difference, I dread to think how a 3 yo with the motor skills (to give just one example!) of an infant will affect her and for how long. She couldn't even crawl at 3 and was the size of a 7mo. Absolutely sickening. I dread to think of the many ways this poor child will be forever behind developmentally. There will be far more than we even know about.

IceCreamCookies · 26/11/2024 21:32

I hope this little one has a wonderful life with a new loving family.
I have a 4 year old and this makes me feel sick to my stomach.. Poor thing.

Dymaxion · 26/11/2024 21:32

Its the length of time this abuse went on for that makes it so astounding, if the little girl had been found at a few months old, then whilst still appalling, could have almost been understandable from a MH point of view. It is staggering the amount of time it went on for and the way she manipulated people to prevent them from finding out, so knew what she was doing was wrong/not normal ?

I thought it interesting that the partner contacted his own Mother on finding the baby, who then contacted the woman's parents. It must have been a huge shock, finding a child you knew nothing about, just left in the house !

DinnaeFashYerself · 26/11/2024 21:32

Pluckolit · 26/11/2024 21:31

Have you read any of the articles? It clearly said the woman says she did not know she was pregnant until she was in labour, ergo she had no scans.

Yes; but I was replying purely to the poster who asked if it would show up in scams - explaining it would not, but also that the pregnancy was unmonitored.

BingGetInTheSea · 26/11/2024 21:32

I’m so sorry this happened to you @SnackSnack. I exclusively pumped for 9 months to make sure my little girl had the same start in life as her big brother, so it breaks my heart hearing about babies suffering because of their clefts. It’s rough on the mums but nowhere near as rough as being a hungry baby. Wishing you lots of blessings ❤️

Frozensnow · 26/11/2024 21:34

Dymaxion · 26/11/2024 21:22

No, none whatsoever. She will be severely damaged for the rest of her life.

Can I ask why ? Genuinely ? I appreciate she may need a lot of help during the rest of her childhood, but is there really no hope of her ever having a normal life ?

I don’t think her brain could recover from the severe neglect. When children are neglected their brains don’t make the neural pathways they need and the first 3 years are critical for this. Her brain damage will likely be too severe to recover from. It’s so sad

ChristmasCheesecake · 26/11/2024 21:34

She probably couldn't suck either so lacked the comfort of self-soothing by sucking.

God almighty that’s just finished me off.

Roomgigi · 26/11/2024 21:36

I suspect there is much much more to this story than is allowed to be published
Unsure how jailing the mother helps anyone tbh