What did you wish you knew about the menopause in your 30's?

[HystericalDinosaur]

So, I'm mid 30's and have realised I know nothing about the menopause. Off to Google that.
But what did you wish you knew about it when you were in your 20's and 30's? What won't Google tell me?

This, absolutely.

Why start worrying 15 - 20 years ahead, about symptoms you might not even get ?

Thank you 🙏🏻

Nothing, it had no bearing on my life at that point and just wasn't relevant.
(Now 52, and peri-menopausal).

And if it works for you, look at thr active ingredient and see if you can get in a generic make - for a lot cheaper.
Doesn't have the puff applicator but about 1/4 of the price.

Thanks so much everyone, really appreciate your responses.
I wouldn't say I'm worried per sae, more when I had my son I was shocked by how much I didn't know about how my body would be during/after pregnancy. And I realised similarly I have no clue about the menopause other than that the media makes it sound awful. It's been really interesting and encouraging to get so many views on this. Thank you.

I wish I'd known that I'd be more exhausted at some points through perimenopause than I was when I had a newborn/young baby. I was floored with exhaustion sometimes between night sweats and insomnia. I'm 50 and post menopause and things seem to be settling down somewhat.

This!

Why on earth are you thinking about this now when you should be living/ enjoying your life? Don’t go looking for troubles, they’ll come knocking.

Some of us don't experience anything.
41 my periods stopped and I've never had any symptoms.
I'm 51 now.

41 is very young (what the NHS would class as early menopause), did you see a doctor at the time?

Yes, he did a blood test.

So I don’t particularly wish I had known anything about the menopause specifically in my 30s however what I do wish I’d been more clued up about was how important health and exercise and strength training are in your 20s and 30s for what you ultimately go through in your 40s and 50s.

eat processed food, drink alcohol and don’t do any exercise and it ages you like anything plus upsets all your hormones. So you are setting yourself up for a bad menopause. Or endometriosis or mental health problems.

yes, yes, and we all know someone who smokes and drinks all the time and looks fabulous, but they’re probably a bit of a wreck underneath it all

Heading to the alcohol comment, the research now is fairly startling and conclusive showing that no amount is good

I thought I was being stoic refusing HRT. But I didn't realise it would protect my bones in later life. Too late for me now.

In fact, I am going to add one more thing. There are quite a few things that are menopause related that I hadn’t realised were menopause related. Here is a very stark example of that. My sister said oh you should go on HRT because you’re angry all the time I didn’t think I was particularly, or at least I felt there was enough going on in my life to warrant being a bit angry about various things so I ended up going on HRT, a very mild dose, and it did indeed calm me down and I am less prone to these explosive bouts of anger which has been most welcome to me and I imagine everyone else. Anyway, this is a cliche thing with menopause, that you get angry so none of this was surprising.

What did happen when I started taking HRT was I stopped needing Tena pads. I would say my daughter‘s birth was fairly violent and left me with a little bit of stress incontinence. As I went through my 40s this started getting a lot worse to the point where I reached about 48 and I really did need to wear a pad every day otherwise a simple sneeze might leave me wetting my trousers. Within a month of going on HRT I stopped needing to wear pads. It turns out lower oestrogen impacts pelvic muscles and bladder and can make this incontinence a lot worse. But apparently a lot of women don’t realise this and they accepted it as a part of aging / a consequence of childbirth, so by the time they’re about 70 they’re fully incontinent but just think it’s an unavoidable age thing that can’t be avoided. but in fact if they had had low-dose oestrogen from late 40s onwards, they probably wouldn’t have become incontinent. This all came from my menopause Doctor who I have seen privately.

Yes, I just use the topical oestrogen cream on my nether regions. Was for vaginal atrophy but has also sorted out the weak bladder that I had for many years. That's definitely worth knowing.

Apart from the obvious hot flushes, I didn’t join the dots about symptoms until afterwards, such as a period when I was more anxious about things.

Also, some people sail through it, others don’t.

Nothing. It really wasn't an issue at all.

The daily headaches. Really starting to get me down! I wake up with one every single day

That you can still have periods AND all the other stuff... sounds daft, but I did not know that.

Take care of your teeth.

Get to the weight and fitness you want to be before menopause because after... not only is it harder to lose weight (or increase muscle) your skin contains less "bounce" so will be a wrinkly covering - ALL over.

And importantly- NOT EVERY SYMPTOM IS THE MENOPAUSE.

I had palpitations and hot flushes/night sweats at 52... thought "finally, menopause is coming"
I had a heart attack at 53... those symptoms were not menopause. I was not menopausal til 58. Last period at 57. Get checked.

That I wouldn't always have lovely thick hair because menopause can get rid of a lot of it regardless of what supplements you take (can't comment on hrt as medical history meant I couldn't take it).

And watch your weight. You may not always be able to eat whatever you want and remain really slim.

and what did that show?

and any other health issues that would would have co tribute to periods stopping at 41?

That the night sweats just go on and on and on............... Although not sure I would like to have known to be honest.

Have been on HRT since a radical hysterectomy 18 years ago and each time I lower the dose or stop HRT the night sweats just return. There is something particularly unpleasant about waking up at 3.00 am and the sheets are soaked.

You've probably tried everything but I found a wool duvet really helped. The night sweats were one of my worst symptoms - DH said it was like sleeping next to Gollum. HRT really helped once I got the right one. Also they have pretty much stopped now - I'm 56 and stopped HRT last year after 10 years on it.

@BigDahliaFan yes, I think I have tried everything, but every time I reduce HRT the night sweats just return, so annoying. I do have a wool duvet during winter but too hot here (NZ) for spring to autumn.

I am 68 and amazed my body still refuses to behave!😁