Party - do I have to feed people?

[Dawevi]

I'm having a big party for an upcoming big birthday, hiring a venue and getting a band or DJ but that is quite expensive. I was looking at catering prices and realise that it will push the party into a price bracket that I'm really uncomfortable with. I was wondering if a party starts at 8:00 or 8: 30 do I really need to feed people?

If I was really clear on the invitations to eat before you come (I'm not sure how I would word this, suggestions are welcome please) then do you think people would be okay with that?

For previous big birthdays I have catered but things are different financially now.

Alternatively, I wondered about just providing bowls of nibbles on the tables.

What do you think? If you went to a party would you be cross if you had to you eat before you went?

I'd just buy 'finger food' so there'd be little to no prep (other than opening packets/ cutting).

Or you couid ask everyone to bring a dish - specify who does sweet or savoury, if you like. Parties like that usually get a good mix of food.

Or order large pizzas to be delivered part way through?

I've done all of the above. Got a discount for pre- ordering a large number of pizzas. It wasn't that expensive.

Nibbles are fine, I’d put that on the invitation just in case people are expecting a full blown meal. I wouldn’t expect it at at that time though…but clearly some people would.

Crisps, nuts, olives - can be cheap. Don’t exceed your budget but equally don’t serve nothing.

Costco? A big old cake?

We had a party a few years ago and they didn’t allow outside catering. However their catering costs were well outside of our budget and would have meant we couldn’t afford the party. We asked the majority of our guests if they minded not having food and they all said no and they were happy to eat before (so we said ‘no food’ on invites).
We got away with bowls of crisps and nuts on the tables and LOTS of cake as that was allowed!

I would go with this option. Honestly, you could spend £150 at Lidl and have loads of nibbles. I often do this for work related events and I can throw together an amazing spread that no one realises is DIY.
Baguettes, crackers, crisps, charcuterie, dips, bread sticks, cheese boards, mini sausage rolls, chicken wings, crudites, grapes. I love this kind of nibbly food and it's more than enough for an evening party.

Yes 100%. You can't invite people to a party and not offer food. It would be incredibly rude. A party isn't a party without a good feast!

It is very odd. How do people cope if they go to pub or to a gig that starts at 8.30-9. Do they need to eat sandwiches and sausage rolls at 10pm to keep them going?!

It’s not about scoring anything. It’s about making sure your guests are catered for. Blowing the whole budget on the cheapest bar you can find and a band that you like is not considering your guests at all. OP might as well save thousands and go to a pub night with a band on if she’s not going to even buy people a drink.

Disagree. They get the entertainment. They get to be with their friends. That's the offer. Obviously the ideal would be to offer something by way of refreshments, but if getting pissed and pigging out on someone else's £ is more important to them than celebrating with their friends, then they shouldn't go, quite frankly.

I wouldn't want any sort of big meal at 8/8.30. Personally a few triangle sandwiches/cocktail sausages would be well received - you could make the sandwiches yourself and get a takeaway (eg in Ireland supermacs) to do some party buckets of cocktail sausages etc - take them out of the takeaway boxes and throw them in a few bowls.
Main thing is to enjoy the night 😊

I would provide nibbles and them organise a burger van to drop by for any guests that get the munchies later, paid for by the guests themselves.

YES FOOD- don’t want to appear like a tight arse!

If 'no food' wasn't specified on the invitation I would expect there to be something to eat and would be bloody starving by 9pm if there wasn't! I'd be ordering something from Deliveroo!

A good DJ playing all night to all tastes
cheaper than a band to

I think for a party starting at eight or 8:30 pm it would be perfectly reasonable just to provide snacks. One thought though, for my 50th birthday each couple bought a platter of fairly substantial sweet or savoury hors d’oeuvre type food. It went down an absolute treat and there was a fantastic variety. Really good friends enjoy being able to contribute this way. It means a little bit of organisation before the event but well worth it.

You haven’t said how many people are going. You def need something - even if it’s sausage rolls/sandwiches etc. what if you got everyone to bring a dish - like a pot luck? Failing that just make 2 vats of chilli - one veg, one reg, bake some potatoes, and get loads of cheeseboards and French sticks.

This why not just have pre recorded music and offer some food to soak up the booze. Are you providing free booze or a bar where guests buy their own drinks? If you're proving free booze it would be better to let guests buy their own booze and provide a buffet. Sandwiches, cheese and crackers/crusty bread, pate, maybe chicken dippers, crisps, slices of pizza, mi I sausage rolls etc would be good.

I think I’d knock it on the head tbh! Despite all the suggestions regarding different venues/different music/different catering, it still sounds like the party belongs in the ‘too difficult’ pile. Just spend the money on an even better holiday instead.

Food for a party more important than professional DJ. I think you would need to provide this even if they eat before.

Can you make your own sandwiches, perhaps cut up some large pizza etc to keep down costs?

Something a bit more substantial than just crisps and nuts.

People go to see live music without having to stop after an hour and have a meal. I can't see the huge fuss.

We had a party for my DD 21st and she didn't want a buffet and apparently lots of parties of her friends didn't have food!

We compromised on lots of boxed pizzas so there wasn't a buffet table. People could grab a box and it was so simple and didn't cost much

There are usually options to buy food though and a private function/party also has different expectations and would include some sort of basic buffet at least

The venue would never be held responsible if you’d provided your own food!

Nope surely people can go from 8.30

• 11 without a sandwich. Come on!

Ditch the DJ (very old fashioned these days) and instead buy a light show music sensored box (approx £20) and hook up a device to play music on their system. People prefer to do own music. Or get a friend to be in charge of music and get some food in. If you need caterers it wil be expensive. If you cater it yourself much cheaper

I think you need some food especially if you’re not offering free drinks. Without, it’s just a come celebrate me at your own expense affair.

For £1500 why not pick up the cheque for your friends at a pub with live music?