Share the worst cake recipe you ever tasted

[SisterAgatha]

Someone I know copies everything I do and tries to pass it off as her own work. I can’t cut them out, I’m stuck with them blah blah blah.

finally after years of this, my friend said to start having some fun with it and share the worst Christmas cake recipe I can find. But I can’t find one sufficiently bad 🤣

Help me.

A few years ago there was the most bloody awful scan bran cake recipe at slimming world .. 🤢

Im sorry to say that any really shit recipe is bound to be american and that is american, am I right?

They might have just, just, got away with it, if it wasnt for that pesky coffee

You could just about manage to enable a sort of sweet savory mince 'roast' type affair, like where North African or West Indian flavours are very much raisins and meat with sweet, salty, meaty flavours all together

But coffee, what is that about, why?

Also, to add, we need a new thread called shit recipes. In food/recipes

It should become a classic

Start it off with sausage cake.

The Delia Smith chocolate Christmas cake is pretty bad.
As is anything made using olive oil.
And the gluten-free victoria sponge with Elmlea filling, which I was once served at a party. I managed to leave my plate somewhere........

You should try my trifle

Layer of ladyfingers
Jelly
Custard
Beef sautéed with peas and onions
Whipped cream
Banana

Et voila!

Pumpkin pie

I think the banana ruins it

@soupfiend

I am a baker and don't rate Jane's Patisserie recipes at all, I'm not sure why she's got such a following tbh

I do one like that and everyone loves it BUT you have to get unwaxed oranges and use ones that are quite sweet. I think its a Portuguese recipe

Interesting that theres another reference to her on this thread!!

She might find adding Asafoetida interesting...( also known as "Devil's Dung).
I added it once to a savoury recipe...as recommended in the recipe...never again!

Not Christmas but very disgusting:
www.vegetariantimes.com/recipes/lemon-tofu-cheesecake-recipe/

oh god I cant stand that stuff. It comes so highly recommended, mainly in Indian dishes. Replusive.

Not a recipe but years ago when my children were at school I won the guess the weight Christmas cake and it was honestly the worst cake I have ever eaten it was dry tasteless and overall yuk

My auntie makes “savoury cake” which is just wrong. The outside looks like a cake, it has a normal cakey texture, except it’s salty and there are olives and other bits and pieces in there like tomato and onion. Everyone else keeps saying how nice it is so I feel like the odd one out not being able to eat it!

Does cheesecake count as cake? Does cheesecake with tomato and kiwi count as cake? What about tomato and kiwi cheesecake served as a starter?

Because that is the most disgusting 'cake' I have ever, ever made. The only thing I can say in my defence it was the 80s.

Honestly, it was in the Mail on Sunday magazine several years (10?) ago now.
It was a 'reader recipe' and if I recall correctly it was a bloke who had sent it in.
I have posted about it before and i think it was once voted 'most awful recipe' on an online food chat forum.

I once made a basic birthday cake which tasted okay and I decided immediately that I was a genius baker. So I improvised a banana cake from my basic cake recipe, which just involved adding a shit tonne of bananas. The fact that the cake was extremely heavy and dripping with grease was apparently not a strong enough indicator that the cake should not have been served up to family.

My husbands relative went to Ballymloe cookery school and came back and gave us the absolutely most disgusting cake you could ever imagine, I’m pretty sure there was lavender in it.

It is the fanciest school I know of, and so expensive, so I think it was like emperors new clothes that they were all trying to pretend it was nice but for the first time in my life, I spat cake out. It was disgusting!!! My mouth went a bit numb like after being in the dentist it was so awful! I think it had lemon icing and some flowers on it.

She is actually a great baker usually though, it was just this one recipe.

Surreal. I'd have voted they use it to poison rats.

My sister made lavender scones once. I think she thought they would evoke an English summer afternoon. Unfortunately most of us were mentally transported to the last time we cleaned the bathroom.

I know American bakers use trex they call it trixo I think, and salt in their butter creams , I tried it once omg it was disgusting like eating pure lard, try that

Ive googled and cant find reference to it

So you need to come up with the goods!!

This might win over sausage cake.

Anything with caraway seeds in it 😱