Ever met someone you later learned had done something really bad? **Content warning: thread contains mentions of child abuse**

[user2848502016]

Just asking because a few months ago someone I worked with suddenly stopped coming to work... then we found out he had been found guilty of possessing child porn 😬
He hadn't been working with us for long so didn't know him that well but he just seemed like a nice, slightly boring middle aged man! I know you can't ever tell by looking at someone but it just made me think anyone I know could be doing anything behind closed doors.....

Thread titled edited by MNHQ to add a content warning

I lived next door to a single man who seemed OK, possibly had a few learning difficulties but held down a job and was pleasant and polite if a bit of a loner. One day a car full of vigilantes knocked on his door and carried out a citizens arrest. They had entrapped him by pretending to be a 14 year old boy and he had sent them dick pics.

Upthread there were posters calling for everyone posting on the thread to call out the use of the word ‘porn’ in this context. Posts from hours before the discussion, and even last night, have been dragged up repeatedly to make the same points. And the few posters, including myself who have called this attitude out as repetitive and derailing to the OP have been lectured as if we are somehow supporting both the use of the word phrase and, by intimation, the act itself. If that isn’t virtue signalling l don’t know what is.

Yes. Rolf Harris!

Yes he did. He killed women from all walks of life. Some where sex workers and some where assumed to be (as they where out at night)

3 people. one did time for a murder they confessed to, the controversy being they weren't actually guilty, they just confessed to cover for someone else, everyone who knows them knows what really happened, but because they confessed, and there was enough circumstantial evidence and a lot of prejudice because of their religious leanings in the 80s, they were convicted.

One twat who's on the SO register for abusing his own daughter.

A friend who's serving time for killing someone during a car accident as they were deemed to be driving recklessly (they live in Arizona so not sure of the actual charge). They disappeared and i got a message from a stranger who said they were a mutual friend and they'd asked them to let online friends know they wouldn't be online for quite a while.

A couple of years ago I was working on a grant application with a team from a London university. I had to write bios of the team, so I googled the lead professor and the first results that came up were that he had been convicted for harassing and stalking a student he'd had an affair with!
Oddly I've just looked him up now and all those search results are gone from google. That's data protection laws for you!

I think we can all understand that anyone using the word 'porn' on this thread is not suggesting that the children involved consented. Come on.

I had no idea that the word shouldn't be used in this context, now I know.
It's fine to point it out but some posters are doing it in such a high-handed way, as if people who don't know are morally corrupt or something.

My affable neighbour had a conviction for child sexual abuse. I read in the local paper that when the police interviewed him to see if they should take him off the sex offender's register he proudly told them that a 9 year old girl was 'flirting' with him but he didn't take it further. He had a job playing the piano and singing on cruise ships, so of course he would get children sitting next to him and requesting Disney songs etc. In his sick mind he believes this meant that they had a sexual interest in him.

He's since changed his name and is doing a PhD in computer science. I can't help thinking that he wants this expertise so he can find different ways to contact other paedophiles and to keep his perversion under the radar. If you Google either of his names now, none of his dark past shows up but there's something about the good work he did for a local kid's charity. It shows that he's learned how to manipulate search engines.

We all need to be aware that a significant percentage of men are really dodgy and they go to surprisingly extreme lengths to get close to their 'targets' and to present a harmless front. All the more reason why we need single sex spaces.

A girl who went to my school who I knew of through friends took pictures and videos of her own children (sexually abusive ones) and sent them to her boyfriend - thank god both of them ended up in prison and her children were kept safe after that.

Discovered a neighbour had been convicted of GBH for choking his GF to the point of unconsciousness. He blamed alcohol in the court case 🙄. But the weirdest part was they were still together. Very glad he has since moved away.

I thought exactly the same!

We haven't though as pornography does still mean consensual. It just means explicit sexual content doesn't it?

Regardless of that child SA images is more appropriate but this thread is getting absolutely ridiculous now with these comments.

My DP served 4 years in prison over 30 years ago for manslaughter. There was a fight that got out of hand and someone died.
He told me before we dated so I could make my own mind up.
He deeply regrets what happened and it’s obviously affected him, we talk about it quite often.

Were they scientists? I remember reading about that 😯 I also watched a clip of him being interviewed by the police - so arrogant in his denial!

It's an unfortunate fact that child abusers are particularly hard to spot as I found in my own experience.
I worked in a social security setting and was tasked to deal with a 16 yr old girl who'd run away from home due to csa from male relatives. I worked so hard securing benefits, accommodation, clothing, furniture etc for her and she was charmingly grateful. I was asked by my manager to arrange for her to come in to go through everything which I did. Before she arrived my manager said that it was going to be a difficult interview as the police were coming to give her bad news but I wasn't to say a thing to her - which I didn't. The police arrived and confirmed who she was with her and promptly arrested her. It turned out that she was the abuser and had sexually abused every single sibling at home and there were no male abusers in the home - it was just her.
She was holding my hand at the time of arrest and I couldn't let go quick enough so she gripped my hand and brightly told me that she was grateful for everything that I'd done - all while smiling widely. Not a shred of guilt or fear or anything really. It was chilling.

The other one that sticks with me was a woman wanting to claim a funeral grant as her child had died but she couldn't remember which one. It was odd but I'd been dealing with her for a few years and she'd always been a lovely caring mother so I assumed that she'd had a breakdown or was in shock etc due to an unexpected tragedy.
She had killed her child and left the others disabled for life when she crashed her car while so high on drugs that she apparently couldn't keep her eyes open. All the kids were unsecured in the back of the car and the one who died went through the front windscreen. She been on her way to a dealer to buy more drugs.

She had run off after the crash and was hiding from the police and still high. She wanted us to process the funeral claim immediately for the money...so she could buy more drugs.

Well the main point about all of this - and there's a very good documentary on it - is that he DID single out women that he believed to be prostitutes because he said he had heard voices that ordered him to kill prostitutes while working as a gravedigger. Whether that is true or just part of his "I'm mad, me" defence, it doesn't change the fact that he targeted women whom he thought were prostitutes. What makes it especially heartbreaking is that because of the prevailing prejudice of the police (and frankly society) at the time, that these women's deaths weren't properly investigated until it became clear that there was a serial killer on the loose, because they were seen as 'less than' or 'unfortunate, but what do you expect' victims.

I think the question which is interesting is if you knew someone who later it transpired had committed an offence but when you knew them you liked them does it then mean that everything they did was wrong.
I once worked with someone for this was true and many people then talking as if everything they did was dreadful but some including myself actually did not say anything negative about the time they worked with them and still view positively the time they worked with them.

That should say doesn't mean its consensual.

One of the things this thread shows is just how important it is for all the sub postmasters to get justice and have their convictions overturned.

Just imagine being one of the wrongfully convicted people trying to get on with their life only to find their conviction for false accounting or fraud comes up every time their name gets googled.

I’ve only read the first page of these posts and I’m stunned how many are about paedophiles. I know it’s not really rare - but my god, for it to come up so frequently from what is a small group of women, how common is it FFS?

I’d like to tell myself that the posters live near each other and are talking about the same people, but they’re not are they? Absolutely fucking awful.

This is a common fallacy.

You should watch some of the many documentaries and read the literature about this monster.
Utter evil.

I worked for a few years with a man who was subsequently jailed for incredibly weird stalking offences against a celebrity. To be fair, though, I wasn't in the least bit surprised, as to me he'd always seemed completely fucking nuts.

I also used to have a lot of dealings with a woman who I was fully aware had been in prison (she worked for a charity getting women ex-prisoners back on their feet). She seemed like a fairly jolly sort of type and from conversations with her I kind of assumed that her offences had been something related to theft/fraud/embezzlement. But after I'd been meeting with her regularly in a work context for about two years she breezily admitted that she'd actually murdered her best friend's husband.

Yes, 2. First is the mother of a childhood friend. She is apparently in jail for child trafficking. I was gobsmacked and tbh still think it can't be true. She was a teacher and seemed so lovely. I can't quite believe she could really be part of some big child trafficking ring. I am unable to reconcile that with my memories of her.
The relative who told us said she won't be getting out of prison ever.
But I've been unable to find any information on her under either of the names I know her by so I can't help thinking it's rubbish

But then why on earth would your own flesh and blood make up such a horrifying lie?

The second is a bloke who groomed young teens over the internet and got caught in a sting. Twice. Those vigilante groups. That one I have no trouble believing. He is a creepy little bastard.

@bluebluetoon I stand corrected.

Someone without their full mental faculties is not a reliable witness to things that may or may not have happened.

stop making this about you. It’s about the poor man you used to try and get points and feel good on social media. Lots of other people have said the exact same thing I did…