Uncle Billy lost his willy

[ThreeLocusts]

Jingle bells, Batman smells/Robin flew away/uncle Billy lost his willy/on the motorway...
(sung to the tune of the Xmas song)

it's one of a handful of rude rhymes my children learned early on in primary school. This was in the Southeast in the 2010s, but a friend who grew up in Manchester in the 1970s said he knew this rhyme too.

I'd just like to get a sense of how widespread and how old it is. Has it been around since the first Batman TV series of the late 50s (I think)? And do you have other examples of disrespectful children's rhymes featuring pop cultural references? Or rude rhymes full stop? I find this one oddly joyful....

Some of mine are too rude to repeat.

One particularly ridiculous one was (sung to the theme tune of the Adam's Family)....

The Adam's Family started
When Uncle Fester farted,
He farted through the keyhole
And paralysed the cats...duh duh duh duh click click

Doesn't even make sense lol

Same in Waterford and Galway.

One banana, two banana, three banana, four
All lined up for the second world war
One with a Tommy gun
One with a stick
And one with an atom bomb tied to his la la la la la la la.....

Jesus Christ superstar
came down from heaven on a yamaha
did a skid, killed a kid
caught his willy on a dustbin lid

And my Jingle bells version is the same as OP’s.

SE, 80s

@insidenumber9
I love that!

oh my god yes!!!!!!!

That one was definitely around in Derbyshire in the 60s. Donald is my uncle's middle name, but my grandparents started using it because Mum couldn't pronounce his first name and they didn't want her mispronunciation to stick. He used to get that rhyme at school (well, that and Donald Where's Your Troosers, which came out when he was 5) and eventually went back to his first name in high school because of it.

Thanks, love both the variations and the outliers. Interesting how Billy travelled while Kojak for example didn't much.

The transgressiveness is the point, isn't it? I vaguely remember the excitement of saying forbidden words as a child.

I remember reading somewhere that (for adults) cursing can work as a kind of pain relief, the transgression has a physiological effect. I can believe it, but no idea how it works.

I remember singing
Under the bram Bush under the tree ,bum,bum ,bum
True love for you my darling true love for me
When we gey married we ,ll raise a family
A girl for me a boy for you
Um tiddler,um sexy
And then I think we pulled our skirts up to show our underwear

Flanders and Swann had something to say on the subject:

Flanders, Swann - P* P B B D** lyrics | Musixmatch

The Batmobile lost a front right wheel on the M1 motorway. Hey!
1970s East Yorkshire

We also had “Jesus Christ! Superstar! Wears frilly knickers and a see through bra.”

We also used to strut around the playground singing “If you like my body, and you think I’m sexy, come on …”. Thanks Rod Stewart.

I've looked all over my hairy bum and I can't find my willy 🥴

This is a PhD research topic right here, Opies.

It's interesting how the rhymes travelled, there was no internet, people were less mobile and they certainly weren't on TV, Auntie Val would have been appalled, yet the same gems of literacy appeared all over the country and even abroad, with local variations, e.g. different motorways.

Our version was:

"We are the Avon girls (don't know why Avon)
We're wear our hair in curls
We wear our dungarees
Down to our sexy knees.
You know the boy next door
He got me on the floor
I charged him 20p
To have it off with me.

My mummy was surprised
To see my belly rise.
My daddy jumped for joy
It was a baby boy.

Then I'm sure there was a line about "my granny" as well but I can't remember it.

I suspect a lot arose more or less at the same time… “Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin flew away” having rhythm, rhyme and logic as a first line. Then different second lines, but rhyming with “away”

This just popped into my head while I was in the shower. Another Batman one - said if someone did something naughty and you were threatening to tell:

I'm telling, you're smelling, your went to Batman's wedding!

And those with the farting through the keys. Our version didn't involve the Addams Family.

My old man's a dustman
He wears a dustman's hat
He farted through the keyhole
And paralysed the cat.
The chair couldn't stand it
The table fell apart
All because of my old man's supersonic fart.

Another gem!

It is quite funny. I guess it was passed down the generations and maybe across families.

We four Beatles of Liverpool are, John in a taxi, Paul in a car, George on a scooter blowing his hooter following Ringo Starr. I learnt that in the North West of England in the 1990s.

Found this on facebook:

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I just remembered, from about the same time (early 80s) as 'Uncle Billy':

Batman and Robin in a Batmobile.
Robin did a fart and paralyzed the wheel.
The engine wouldn't start; the brakes all fell apart.
Robin killed off Batman with his supersonic fart.

not saying this at all to offend anyone so hope this doesnt!.. but just wondering if anyone heard of this as dont think this one has been mentioned yet but its just came into my head as it something we use to sing in primary school...

Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
So Jack could touch Jill's faannyyyy
Jack got a shock
Jill had a cock
Cos Jill's a fucking tranny

🤦🏻‍♀️

@ToWhitToWhoo - lovely to find another Flanders and Swann fan! I have a version where one of the verses started:
"Disney is planning a double bill
Pee, po, belly, bum, drawers.
Christopher Robin meets Fanny Hill
Pooh Bear, belly, bum, drawers!"

And to lower the tone a bit:

"To fart, to fart, it is no crime,
It gives the stomach ease.
It warms the bed in wintertime,
And suffocates the fleas!"