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Original poster

Were you attracted to your partner or husband at first sight?

130 replies

ChipsCheeseAndGravey · 20/09/2024 13:38

I was taking to a friend the other day who was saying how when she met her partner she was taken a back by how handsome he was (can’t say I see if I’m honest but I kept that to myself). It got me thinking - when I first saw my partner I didn’t think he was that attractive. He had and still does have a great face but he had this fucking awful haircut. He had a mullet with a rat tail I shit you not. My original plan was to leave after one drink, but about half way through the first pint I knew he was the one for me, rat tail and all. Now the haircut is a distant memory and we both laugh about it. But I want to know:

Were you attracted to your DP or DH at first sight?

If not, how long before you were physically attracted to them and what changed?

OP posts:
GingerPirate · 20/09/2024 16:11

Not at all - lots of reservations.
It came gradually, we both earned each other's love and respect and have been married for 20 years.
😁

OuterSpaceCadet · 20/09/2024 16:13

God yes. I'd had very classically good looking boyfriends but this guy was actually beautiful.

The first time we met up again (after I pulled him on a night out) I had to keep glancing at his face to reassure myself I hadn't imagined it, I couldn't believe how gorgeous he was.

But.... My friend talks similarly about her partner who really isn't all that, to me. it's funny, and lovely, how we can all have such different tastes.

cherrysonata · 20/09/2024 16:15

God no.

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LightDrizzle · 20/09/2024 16:15

No. He’s not my type at all. I’ve never shagged or gone out with my type although I have been out with a couple of very good looking blokes.

My type is tall, dark, brown eyes, slim , big nose, lovely smile with crinkles round the eye. A sort of fit professor look.

Fluffyc1ouds · 20/09/2024 16:16

We actually didn't like each other! We met through friends and then ended up hanging out together more as part of a big group but I found him really irritating and he thought the same of me. We had a full on argument once as we annoyed each other so much and it's very funny to look back on now!

Then we ended up chatting more and getting to know each other. It turned into talking and laughing for hours together in the pub. Something switched for both of us and I realised I was absolutely head over heels for him. We're now married, have a child, been together for years and we're each other's favourite person.

NPET · 20/09/2024 16:16

Always fall in love with their smiles - then look for more.
In many ways.

BG2015 · 20/09/2024 16:17

Yes totally

SanMarzano · 20/09/2024 16:17

Yes, but I was drunk to be fair 🤪

StealthilyEmbraceTheSilkyBeans · 20/09/2024 16:23

This reply has been withdrawn

Removed at poster's request

ILoveToCleanSaidNooneEver · 20/09/2024 16:25

Yes. I found him extremely good looking and actually wondered why he was interested in me. Together 24 years and he's still handsome, but boy can he be a grumpy bastard nowadays 🤣. Still love him though.

MinervaMcGonagallsCat · 20/09/2024 16:26

I disliked him when we first met. Took a number of years (5) to win me round.

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 20/09/2024 16:27

@ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley

I’m so sorry.

But… my one and only had a devastating diagnosis in 2014. A genius surgeon saved his life a year later. He is not the man he was before, but he is still here and still well worth being beloved. I do so hope you may yet find a similar stay of execution.

RuggedHairyTortoise · 20/09/2024 16:27

Oh yes. I was in a taxi going down the street and I saw him walking in the opposite direction and I had a thunderbolt. I thought; 'That is my husband'.

He;s exactly my type- he is a dead ringer for a young Charles Dance. I was bowled over.

I did not actually meet him in person for a good 6 months and we met at a work event. i spent that work event watching him covertly. Right at the end he came over and asked me for a drink. We went for a drink. The next day we went for another drink and I moved in that night.

24 years now.

DramaAlpaca · 20/09/2024 16:29

No, but he was Irish and I thought his accent was gorgeous. He grew on me, and we've been together 36 years now.

Princesswhatever · 20/09/2024 16:29

No not at all really. I liked him enough, thought he was a nice looking man, tall, big so definitely my type. But I certainly didn't think wow. In the way I fancied boys when I was a teenager.

But then I'm not exactly stunning myself so...

Realistically when you look at most people around you, most are average looking at best aren't they? So we can't all be/be with the best looking ones.

I think you e got to have some attraction, but there's got to be much more. Plus some people age badly, others get better.

There are people I fancied in my teens and early 20s who were imo stunning, but look terrible now.

RuggedHairyTortoise · 20/09/2024 16:31

RuggedHairyTortoise · 20/09/2024 16:27

Oh yes. I was in a taxi going down the street and I saw him walking in the opposite direction and I had a thunderbolt. I thought; 'That is my husband'.

He;s exactly my type- he is a dead ringer for a young Charles Dance. I was bowled over.

I did not actually meet him in person for a good 6 months and we met at a work event. i spent that work event watching him covertly. Right at the end he came over and asked me for a drink. We went for a drink. The next day we went for another drink and I moved in that night.

24 years now.

Oh and last weekend I was making coffee on the Saturday morning and he walked into the kitchen all bleary eyed. My breath was taken away from me because he is such a beautiful looking man.

He's in his 70s now and I am in my 50s. He takes my breath away very often. My favourite thing is holding his hand as we drift off to sleep.

MotherOfVizslas · 20/09/2024 16:33

Not at all🤣 We were friends first and then feelings developed.

ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley · 20/09/2024 16:33

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 20/09/2024 16:27

@ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley

I’m so sorry.

But… my one and only had a devastating diagnosis in 2014. A genius surgeon saved his life a year later. He is not the man he was before, but he is still here and still well worth being beloved. I do so hope you may yet find a similar stay of execution.

Thanks for this. I am going to fight tooth and nail to get him treatment.

Runskiyoga · 20/09/2024 16:34

We talked and laughed non stop for hours as soon as we properly met.

ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley · 20/09/2024 16:34

Sourisblanche · 20/09/2024 15:59

@ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley I’m so sorry.

I was very attracted to future DH. Super tall with wide shoulders and a strong jawline. Then he started speaking and was obviously Dutch. It was a done deal at that point even though I wasn’t looking for a long relationship. Been together 22 years.

Thanks. It means a lot.

user86345625434 · 20/09/2024 16:38

Yes - 30 years on still feel the same.
It was like something from a crappy mills and boon novel, absolutely like a lightening strike. If anyone else told me the same story I’d be rolling my eyes so hard, but it really was love at first sight!

deflatedbirthday · 20/09/2024 16:39

Yes. Not something I'd admit at the time. We were both in other relationships and worked together. But the first time I saw him I thought he was beautiful. We re-met a few years after leaving that workplace, both now single and the rest is history. Turns out he felt the same way too when we first met. Married 2.5 years.

JadeSeahorse · 20/09/2024 16:48

Definitely not! (Although strangely when first introduced and shook hands I just knew I would end up marrying him. Seriously weird 🥺)

I knew he definitely liked me as we worked together at the same hotel - he was one of the bosses - as it was common knowledge amongst the staff. I was a part time receptionist but had a ft position too as a p.a.

He was nothing like my previous bfs who were dark haired with dark eyes, slim and not too tall but very good looking, (and pigs to boot.☹️)

The hotel GM gave me some excuse one night about the transport to take me home had a problem but soon to be DH had offered to give me a lift. Little choice but to accept. We ended up talking in his car for 3 hours, went out for a drink the following night, he asked me to marry him 6 weeks later and we were married within 22 months of meeting.

All this was 47 years ago. I still say he blackmailed me into marriage - said we were finished if I didn't say yes - and he says it was the best days work I ever did.
Must admit he was right the irritating bugger.😂

Honeytutu · 20/09/2024 16:52

Yes . Even though he was on the dole , didn't have a car and everyone laughed at us and said we would have nothing .

40 years later we have our own home and good pension pots , two good kids and both drive .

SerenityNowInsanityLater · 20/09/2024 16:57

My first husband, absolutely! I’ll never forget the moment we met. It was a real, once in a lifetime feeling for us both. Electrifying!
We’ve been divorced for 23 years (you were expecting me to say married! 😆) but honestly, he remains one of my dearest friends. Our feelings are totally platonic. He’s remarried. I’m divorced for the second time (there won’t be a third marriage, given my bad record), but he’s on my shortlist of favourite people on the planet and I really love him. We had a terrible marriage but our friendship is an extraordinary gift.