Help me get over being so short

[BodyHate78999]

Name changed because I'm aware how ridiculous I am.
I'm 4'11 and hate it. I mean really hate it and it's taking over my life. When I was younger I played up the 'cute' which I can't do as a 40 something. I'm otherwise healthy, solvent, succsessful.... but I can't get over the 'short'. I haven't dated in years because I worry about being such a disappointment when I turn up. I'm getting a bit obsessive about it, to the point I get to client meetings etc early so I'm already sitting down.
This isn't something I can admit in real life because I'm fully aware I'm ridiculous. I'm otherwise objectively attractive but I hide away because I'm so unhappy with my height.

I'm 5 foot and have never felt short .. I mean I know I am but I maintain ( and it's hard! ) my figure and I have an hourglass shape which helps but I'm often shocked when I see pictures of myself next to. Normal heightens people 🤣

I have a lovely successful kind husband so it never stopped me having a nice life

I will add my dh is 6.1 . I actually don't overly find short men attractive ( ironic I know ) !

You sounds like you could be straying into dysmorphia honestly. I would look to see if you could get some counselling.

I'm a bit taller at 5' 1" but I've generally always been happy being small. Small people are tough!

I am 5 foot 0 and love being small and petite! Loads of men like short ladies. I'm age 40 and buy children's shoes and clothes which are much cheaper and also more colourful/interesting 😆 Really the only drawback is not being able to see at gigs.

@BodyHate78999 I'm almost exactly the same height and body shape as you, and totally get where you're coming from. I've hated it all my life, and feel it has held me back in lots of ways. However, what is interesting, is reading the experiences of short women on here who say it genuinely doesn't bother them. Which says to me it really is all about attitude and acceptance. I'm now 50, and have stopped wearing heels, and am finally learning to own my 'short'. I would still much rather be 5 inches taller, and HATE when people make jokes about my height (which they do, more often than you would think), treat me like a child, or worse, just ignore me, but I suppose the sooner we accept our lot, the happier we'll be. You're perfect as you are. Big hugs. X

It's the proportions. You can be short and still have comparatively long legs, Kylie Minogue for example who I think is 5 feet tall.
No, I don't think men go for tall women necessarily.

I don't think Kylie Minogue (having looked) has long legs. She's too short.

I disagree. You'd have to have an **extremely short body at 5ft and below and legs still wouldn't look long because of your diminutive height.

I think because on these short women threads many usually say they are mistaken for children, or younger, because of their lack of height.

Come to Scotland you definitely won't be out of place..I'm 5,4 ,Dw 5,1..
Joking aside try not to give it a second thought.

I don't think Kylie is particularly long-legged either but she, along with Kim Kardashian & others mentioned upthread, prove that you don't have to be willowy and long-legged to be attractive to the opposite sex.
Maybe the curves are emphasised more on a shorter body?!

A list of famous shorties here for anyone interested

www.sheknows.com/entertainment/slideshow/7932/short-celebrity-women/25/

I saw this on Instagram the other day Same height party in Germany I thought it was really interesting - looking at how we'd treat each other if we were all at the same eye level!

I can't help you OP, I'm tall. I was with a short colleague the other day in a crowd and she was saying she really wished she could see over everyone's heads like I can.

On the other hand, like others on this thread, I have found that men like shorter women so they feel protective or something.

I think really all that this means is that we have to come to terms with things we can't change.

I am 4 feet 10 3/4 inches. Doesnt bother me that I am short. Can't do anything about it. Can't wear heels since I broke my leg 6 years ago.
Accept it and let it go...

I'm 5ft 3in and wish I was more petite as whilst I'm fairly short, I'm solidly built. Not fat, but dumpy maybe, buy I have big hands and big legs so I do feel uncomfortable.

My 12yo, 13yo and 15yo kids are all taller than me, and I have to get my eldest daughter to get stuff off the top shelves for me 😄 which gives her much hilarity.

I do like being able to buy cheap shoes, but god trouser/jumpsuit shopping is a PIA.

The way I see it, you've got to own it and realise that most people really won't care as long as you are good at your job. If you're shit at your job, it won't be your height they worry about.

I get jealous of small petite women and Kylie is stunning. I guess there's less of you to break or mutate from a medical point of view. Annoyingly there's lots of petite people in my family except me. I've got really long legs that are in no way in proportion to the rest of me. It makes me look like a funny mr man character. Sigh.

Through images in news and the media, we are made to believe women are actually a lot taller than they seem. The average height of an American women is 5”3, and there are many many famous actresses and superstars under that height.

https://www.sheknows.com/entertainment/slideshow/7932/short-celebrity-women/9/

Look here (link above) at many incredibly beautiful and talented women, all 5’2 and under. List includes:
Simone Biles
Ariana Grande
Kristen Bell
Shakira
Olsen Twins
Kylie Minogue
Any Kardashian (minus Khloe)

Salma Hayek
Lady Gaga

I totally understand you as I used to be the same, but I literally do not give a shit now. It never crossed my mind and I would rather be this height than taller than average.

xxx

Oh sorry, I think I just posted the same link. ❤️

Shorter then u and happily married :)

It's fine to resent having to ask people to fetch you things from supermarket shelves, it's fine to resent that you can't get clothes to fit (even petite ranges are for women 5' 3" tall) and it's fine to resent the fact you are too small for Lime bikes or for some cars' driving positions. But please do not resent the way you were made.

Most people know you are short, but they do not know how short and they don't care. Yes, I too have a bit of a complex about my short stature (about 4' 10") and I often wonder if I would be a different person if I were taller, but you mustn't dwell on it because you can't change it. Make the most of yourself and make height irrelevant.

I am not as tall as you are.

consider getting some counselling to work on increasing your self confidence. You can't change your height but you can change your view of it.

I’ve only had a problem with being short since entering middle age and only then in some situations. It’s because I feel like my lack of height compounds the whole invisibility thing. I actively avoid public transport at really busy times as I’ve experienced one too many times groups of young men crowding in around me like there’s nothing there. Had two passing a drink back and forth milimetres from my face once - totally dehumanising.

Didn’t happen when I was younger, and I feel like I’d own the space around me a bit more now if I wasn’t at their armpit height or lower when standing.

We have a student uni girl in my job who is really quite short. But she does her job, when she speaks, there is confidence and normality. This is what makes a life goes round, not your looks only

I am 5.3 and still heard plenty of times from both men and women and even my mother in law, how omg, if I was a bit taller, how the whole world would be in my feet. What?

I'm 4'8 and it's just part of being me, I even introduce myself as wee J316. This is really outing so I'll name change after but my dad is only 5'1, his mum, my wee nana, was 4'6, his sisters are maybe 4'10 as are my female cousins. My sister is 4'11 and her daughter is the same height as me with a partner that's 6'10! 😁 People do mention it but it doesn't really bother me. It's a struggle to get clothes to fit as I have a 23.5 inch inside leg and since I've put a lot of weight on everything looks a bit frumpy. I would like lower worktops in my kitchen like my nana had put in. I also more often than not have to ask someone to reach someone in the supermarket or worse have to go look for someone. Cheaper kids trainers, walking boots are a bonus. I draw the line at people leaning on my head 🙄 I was still getting asked for ID in my 30's but I just took that as a compliment. My 10 year old grandson is now taller than me 😁

But what you're experiencing is something very different and it's really impacting your life so I suggest some counselling. 💛

Tall men do seem to like petite women. I've always seen it as an advantage

that’s because you can give a blowjob standing up

Short people live longer, I believe.

Oh, of course, there must be disgusting pervs out there who think/like to imagine that they've hit on a child.

But just because a short adult woman may sometimes be mistaken for a child, that obviously doesn't mean that she must act like she IS a child and not seek a romantic partner in her life.

A great many men do find short women attractive - whether specifically because they are short or, far more commonly I would think, because they find a woman attractive as a whole person and she just happens to be short - and I'm sure the vast majority are not under any illusions that a petite woman they approach is a child; nor are they in any way seeking a relationship with a child.

What about the two blokes on the left at the back, and the woman on the right - why are they not part of the same-height contingent?

Also, why does the already-tallest person have blocks to stand on as well?!