Adult telling 12 year olds to leave playground

[Wrenbird27]

This happened to my friends daughter. She was with her friends and an older man (~65ish) approached them and told them they were too old to be in the playground. He demanded that they leave before they broke equipment 'with their weight'. He was very persistent and a few of the girls were upset.

The playground was very quiet at the time - just a few other kids.

None of the parents of the 12 year olds were close by - a few of the girls phoned their Mums who arrived quickly but he was gone by then. He didn't have a child himself which the girls noted and thought was odd.

My friend says her daughter won't go there anymore. I think this is a pity as it was a safe area (I thought!) for them to hang out. If there had been more children in the playground they would have moved to the side but the girls said nobody was waiting to go on equipment. The equipment is very sturdy - I've seen adults sitting on swings in there before!

What should they have done?

FFS what is your problem ?!!

Nope, I'll keep telling my 4yo that the park is a shared space and if someone is using one piece of equipment then she can use another one.

Other people can make all the TikTok videos they like. You can be known as the old woman who goes around yelling at 12 yos for having the audacity to use communal spaces, and lecturing them about what you consider to be more constructive (quite ironic considering that you're currently arguing about tweens in parks on Mumsnet) if you like. Doubtless you'll be horrified if they shout right back at you and use it to back up your assertion that they are a menace to society.

It's only batshit if you actually think 12 year olds should be spending their days playing on swings and roundabouts. That's batshit to me.

What's yours? Don't know why you'd want to let your children roam and do useless things designed to enrich much younger children instead of encouraging them to find ways to enrich their 12 year old life.

I do think it's interesting that the OO hadn't clarified the age thing. There is a section in ours which is for under 8s, and teenagers are drawn to it like moths to a flame. They often gave to be asked to move because little children can find them quite intimidating. If that's the case here, then I'm absolutely with the man. Usual tedious Mumsnet ageism by the way.......

And when your 4 year old can't actually access the playground because a group of teenagers have taken it over, I supposed you won't complain to the council, and point out that you pay tax.

Almost a millon NEETS, but the problem are people who don't support this ridiculous let my kid roam anywhere style of parenting of course.

Sure when UK becomes a mega rich country, your kids will have all that, not when government is planning to increase taxing to fund basic expenditure and is worried about heating homes in the winter.

Newsflash, 12 year olds aren’t teenagers. They’re children.

They should go to the park but not use playground equipment to sit and make tic toc videos or if they are designed for younger kids.

Well, in that case the 12yos will have to continue sharing the play equipment we do have (hopefully considerately) with the younger ones, won't they?

I think it would be much healthier for us all if 12yos in general were spending more of their days playing on swings and roundabouts than they presently do.

There's nothing worse than a gang of teenagers, or unsupervised 12 year olds, hanging around a playground preventing small children from using it. I know of one that closed completely as parents were reluctant to go in there with so many teenagers sitting on swings smoking. Not a chance they were going to move off them.

Why am I suddenly getting horrible adverts on here for things that aren't even true??

Why should my 4yo not be able to access the park because older children are there too? There's plenty of things to play on. I don't see what connection being allowed to go to the park at 12 has on future employment prospects. Maybe you think keeping children locked in their bedroom outside of school hours, with a designated hour to attend an organised sports activity, is the best preparation for independent living?

This thread is divided between people who have had their small child unable to use the age appropriate play equipment because of older kids and those that haven't. And never the twain shall meet.

I disagree. My children are both under 8. We have teenage "swing-hoggers" in our local playground (a nice but firm word usually does the trick) and occasionally the playground is mobbed by older kids just sitting and having a gossip, but it's not a huge problem. It's annoying, but usually it's a few older ones who come out of the woodwork when most of the younger ones are heading home for dinner and bed.

I get it - they need to stretch and move and climb and swing too. Most secondary schools don't have playgrounds with any play equipment so it's not like they're getting this at school. And school PE is pathetic. It must been really frustrating for them that their need for free movement and to stretch themselves physically (just like younger kids have to do) isn't really being recognised.

The 12 year olds who go to the park, to some kind of bat or ball or running/exercise related activity, are self sufficient, keen to challenge themselves, and generally do quite well educationally and in other aspects of their lives.

The ones who go to sit on playground equipment do not. They have no direction in life and no drive to discover their own abilities.

It's fairly obvious isn't it. And people need to stop suggesting kids need more "things", when they need more parental input to teach them how to keep themselves challenged and occupied with the large plethora of activities already available to them. Unfortunately the attitudes of many on here show that they themselves do not understand this and aren't self sufficient in this regard.

Blimey

There aren't only two options for 12 year olds, play on the swings and roundabouts or stay indoors.

I think it would be much healthier for all of us if 12yos in general were taught to come up with ways to challenge themselves physically and mentally without coming up with excuses regarding available facilities. Particularly involving group sports. Just need some jumpers down as goal posts and a ball, or a stick and a ball. Much healthier than sitting down on a roundabout.

What's the excuse?

The facilities are there. They're using them. So long as the playground in question is not specifically for u-12s, then I don't see what the problem is.

And there is a value in free, unstructured, creative play, including for the over-12s, that extends far beyond the benefits of organised structured sports and exercise classes and sessions.

There is an increasing school of thought that even adults could benefit from greater opportunities for unstructured play. Revolutionary, I know!

I suppose you'd call all of this "time-wasting" though 🙄.

Newsflash, 12 years olds that sit around on playground equipment making tik tok videos, grow into teenagers sitting around on playground equipment making tik tok videos.

Also newflash 12 year olds that go to the park for a run, kick a ball around etc. turn into well adjusted adults.

Absolutely bizarre. Kids don't always need to be doing something, sometimes they need some time to just "be".

Strange you seem to think 12 year olds need a fixed piece of equipment designed for children much younger, that gives them far less creative freedom to express themselves than park sports to have "free unstructured creative play"

Chucking a frisbee about or inventing a new game with a ball in a park isn't an "organised structured sport".

And 12 year olds on the whole these day don't go and sit on swings and roundabouts to have free unstructured creative play.

Oh don’t be daft

12 year old kids don't need a roundabout to "be"