Do they really "only get more expensive?"

[nanodyne]

I see this mentioned a lot in relation to kids, is it actually true? At their most expensive (so far) we've paid ~£1.5k for 4 days a week in a nursery and this takes into account the available funded hours and "tax-free" (🙄) allocation. Do teenagers seriously cost more than this per month..?! This is only the childcare component obviously, not including the clothes they're getting through at a rate of knots, the vast amounts of fruit/food they both consume/throw on the floor/smear on the cat, day trips at the weekends, classes on my day off with them etc..

Is this just something people who had kids before childcare became more than a mortgage say? I'm partly incredulous, partly panicking!

Not if you count childcare IMO. And then it really depends what you provide for them.

Yes it's true that childcare used to be a lot cheaper - I can't remember what I used to pay for DS1 but I'm sure it was less than my rent, which was £600. He didn't go to nursery full time.

In clothes/shoes/transport pass/phone/school stuff/pocket money/clubs/birthdays - probably around €250 per month - counting share of bills like food/electricity/internet/hot water - probably more like €450.

The food and clothes are pretty killer It was a bit of a jump when he went into adult clothing sizes. And I don't cover designer stuff, maybe a few sports branded items a year. Majority is H&M/Primark/Next type of thing.

We are not at driving age yet and not sure if we could cover lessons. He is desperate to get a Saturday job when he turns 16 so maybe he'll pay for them himself. At the moment he does want a bike, which we will try to get him when we move to a flatter place.

Nursery costs me £24k a year per child.

I assume university costs less than that - unless paying their fees too?

@MidnightPatrol Nursery didn't cost me that much 20+ years ago,

I'm paying £530 a month for university accommodation, alone. Before mobile phone and car insurance cost etc.

My personal nursery costs were similar.

nursery costs near me are 2k per dc for a f/t place, I don’t think most spend close to that on a teenager even at uni.

Why is uni cited as expensive?

Because the maintenance loan is means tested. To get the full maintenance grant loan of £10,227 (England outside London) parental income must be less than £25k.

where parents earn more than £25k the amount a student can borrow is reduced on a sliding scale with an expectation that parents too up to the £10, 227.

parents earning over £62k will need to top ip by £5460 per year.

on top of that the £10,227 doesn’t cover accommodation in many university towns. See my post about halls at £8900 and private accommodation at £9,600 plus bills so reality is you will top up to above the £10, 227.

Obviously your DC can live at home, get a job (if their course/uni permits it) and there are degrees of frugality that can be applied but I’m horrified at the number of parents with small DC who genuinely have no idea what university might cost.

This. And uni housing.

Exactly this, DD's maintenance loan doesn't even cover accommodation, so I pay her accommodation and she lives off the maintenance loan. Most parents of Uni students I know do it that way so their costs are fixed for the year.

The parents I know top up between £400-600 a month which I thought was pretty average.

When I went uni 20 yrs ago my accommodation was more than my loan amount.

Seriously if you aren't aware of how expensive Uni is then I suggest you do some research. Parents are expected to contribute and those contributions can be very very ££

My DC’s maintenance loan covers approx half their rent. Yes they can work and many do but it isn’t easy finding work that fits in around term dates and so topping up by parents of around £500 a month is needed by most.

Driving lessons and insurance aren’t cheap either, yes they can work but mine have found it hard finding work that fits in around 6th form as many employesr want more than the 10 hours a week max that college recommends and there are a lot more options if you can drive so many parents pay for they to learn as soon as they turn 17.

Things have changed since most of us went to uni and there are fewer jobs you can do in term-time.

Exactly this.

We will have 3 at uni for one year, and they only get the minimum maintenance loan (they are taking out tuition loans). We currently put £1000-£1500 a month aside, which is then spent on their accommodation X3 a year, and they live on the loan plus anything they earn in the holidays. Luckily one is v cheap as he is at Cambridge and will live in college for 4 yrs so it is much cheaper than DD at Notts - her uni accommodation was c£9k last year, but that was fully catered.

It depends, but as a generalisation:

If you are paying for full-time childcare, then no, they don't get more expensive.

If you are NOT paying for full-time childcare, then yes, they do get more expensive.

Probably not as expensive as full time nursery.

But general spending is much more - they eat loads, their clothes and shoes are bigger, so even if you're not buying the brand names they want it still costs more. Activities are dearer - by their nature and because you pay full price for everyone. Eating out is £££ as are holidays because you need more space and more activities. Presents are smaller but also more expensive.

If they do continue with hobbies that can be expensive, and driving lessons are now £45-£50 an hour where we live and once they pass their test you face ridiculous insurance cost, even if they just want to be able to drive the family car, not run their own.
If they go to uni, most families will be expected to top-up to cover rent and expenses but they'll still come home in the holidays and eat all the snacks!

Most will have jobs which will help but generally the parents end up financing a lot of these things.

All of this ^. I was a SAHM when DD was little so didn't need childcare so teenage years are definitely more expensive for us. Plus waiting list for orthodontist is 2+ years round here so add £2000 + for braces plus £600+ a year for subsidised 6th form college bus. Plus visits to Uni open days...

I also don’t think you have to pay for driving lessons, car etc. My parents didn’t & I won’t be but as I was a Londoner as are dc it’s not needed. I did it post uni when I had a job & lived at home.

I have two teens. It cost us over £1500 a month for three days a week when they were both in nursery. We got 12 hours free a week when oldest was three.

So it was a bit cheaper but I would t go as far to say as that was a walk in the park - we had to take money out of savings every month to cover it as my salary wasn’t enough.

Yes, also paying adult prices for air travel, holidays, entry into attractions - despite not being an adult.

I also don’t think you have to pay for driving lessons, car etc. My parents didn’t & I won’t be but as I was a Londoner as are dc it’s not needed. I did it post uni when I had a job & lived at home.

I live quite rurally and round here most of us consider driving a basic life skill. If you can't drive I think you're limiting your choices regarding future work opportunities. Your children might not be able to afford to live in London (or anywhere with decent public transport).

Have you not looked into what uni fees involve? The amount the student gets loaned is based on parents topping up the difference. Very different to early 2000s.

They do and they don’t, it’s great not paying childcare fees but weekly food shop goes up considerably, sports, clubs, clothes, electronics it all adds up.

tbh the food shop is the worst of it for me, you can say no to the other stuff! (Well not clothes) 😂

@Panicmode1

i feel your pain! I will have two periods with three at university (4DC) with a brief respite in between.

We’re fortunate that it’s affordable but I do get nervous for parents that seem to have no idea of potential costs.

@Sweetpeasaremadeforbees hence why I said I was a Londoner as are my dc…. Far more economical to use public transport for getting to jobs in London too. They may not want to live in London but they will be able too.

There is no way university is going to get cheaper. It will almost certainly be more expensive, quite soon I expect.