The rise of online misogyny?

[Honeysp00n]

The other day there was an article on the BBC website about the spread of online misogyny essentially radicalising young and not so young men against women.

I certainly have noticed more and more content about dating, relationships and inter gender animosities in my feeds.

What I notice in videos by women is that mostly they are talking about having boundaries, knowing your worth as a person (i.e. that it doesn’t reside in what a man thinks of you), how to look after yourself when dating and on apps and what is and isn’t acceptable behaviour i.e. how to spot someone who is controlling and abusive. While some may warn against certain men or men with certain behaviours I haven’t noticed any that say all men are bad or that focus on the men at all.

When I see videos from men most are either pick up artist types supposedly teaching you how to charm a woman into bed with you or ones where men just sit there an rage against women in general. All women are immoral, women cannot love, women only use men for resources, women only want Chad, all western women are evil but it’s ok because they will all end up alone with a bunch of cats and that they are going crazy because now men are walking away from them and won’t pursue them anymore and they will all get to laugh at sad depressed women in their 30’s, 40’s and 50’s who ended up childless and alone and full of regret that she dumped a guy like him when she was young and hot. Also they brag about how they are going overseas to find traditional women to marry who are thin and young ( what forever?) to have their children and they encourage other men to go overseas to find a woman who will respect them as men and know their place. As if they don’t see these women from “overseas” as real people but just a utility that they can hopefully exploit.

I get that much of this is click bait, it plays into the worst impulses of people and earns the shameless creator a few dollars so they play up to it but the comments are also full of men who watch this stuff and agree with it.

If men are so happy with not dating women especially western women, if they are also happy and fulfilled with the passport bro lifestyle then why are they literally obsessed with the very women they seem to hate? Why is that all they talk about or make content about?

I personally know a couple of men who have non western wives (traditional women from ex Soviet countries) and they're expecting to be kept and not work (no children either). They won't even learn to drive. The men aren't well off. So these so called men might get a shock if they go down the trad wife route.

Most men are delusional and have very low EQs so they're often incapable of knowing how to sustain a proper relationship. They basically just want a mummy whom they can shag then send back into the kitchen. She also has to keep him financially as well of course and clean the house 😂 makes yer vag seal shut just thinking about it. At least cats are good company and don't leave dribble marks all over the toilet floor.

Poor men. They literally haven't got a clue.

Joking aside, this is a real problem. It was raised some years ago by some of the parent reps at my kids' school that we should be doing something in PHSE to counter these messages. Lots of boys of 11-15 spouting about how 'feminism has gone too far' etc.

@lawnseed it does seem like women are very clearly stating that they want an actual partner in life not an adult man they have to look after as and it’s like some men are totally affronted by this request, how dare women ask for such things and then they imagine women will be upset that men who think this way are taking themselves off the dating market as if they aren’t saving us an unpleasant task!

@SheRasBra This is true, it’s very scary that very young boys are taking this message in even before they have a chance to have their own experiences and relationships. It puts young women at real risk.

You see it so much how men expect the traditional woman who does everything at home, but they also expect the woman to bring in 50% of the household income, They don't want to be the traditional husband, They want their cake and eat it.

V true, they also fail to recognise that living life as a woman is physically harder, between monthly cycles, pregnancy and menopause and all of this impacts women's earning potential and quality of life and pension pot.

They want a compliant, complicit, complacent, baby producing wife and they ll resent her when she is not contributing financially. They are not confident enough to marry an equal and be an equal.

I read that a quarter of boys believe Andrew Tate type radicalisation and that kind of misogynist messaging, coupled with unfettered access to porn, is creating a lot of problems.

Perpetrators of violence against women and girls, are becoming younger, the average age is 15 and the highest amount of domestic violence is found in 16-19 year olds.

Another problem with porn is the violence associated with it such as strangulation which can have very serious consequences and girls being pressured into carrying out acts that have become normalised.

The internet is created by men, run by men, owned by men. For the most part. It's a global network of patriarchy. And the internet gets into your head in a way that no other media does. I don't know what the answer is.

This. My grandad was a wonderful, traditional man. He thanked my gran for cooking and cleaning and handed over his pay every week. He was a gruff, strong man but incredibly gentle.

He'd have been horrified at what's going on.

It's the difference between benign sexism, and hateful misogyny. These men and boys hate women and hate that they have to work at all to get their dicks sucked. And there are so many of them. DD says there are about 2 nice boys in her class. The rest say sexist/misogynist things and they are 13-14.

I guess in a patriarchal society, misogyny can weaponise anything for its own ends, including feminism. I see a lot of that - comments along the lines of "well you wanted equality, so you have to be prepared to be prepared to work like a man".

I mean these 'men' aren't men are they? Let's be honest. They're whining little scrotes no matter how many tattoos they get or how long they spend in the gym.

Women want men not little boys. They're now having massive tantrums by realising that women don't want scrappy scrag ends which belong in the bin. We have our own lives and our own ideas now. Jog on lads.

When women dislike men or a certain type of men they want them to leave them alone.

When men dislike women or women they don’t find attractive they have a need to taunt, bully, harass and abuse.

I blame society, mainly patriarchy and the women who make excuses up for them “boys will be boys” etc.

Men through history have had the upper hand with women being second class citizens. Some even believed they had bigger brains than women.
Now they are finding it hard to cope with today's women who can get by very well without men if they want. We can look after ourselves thank you very much and don't need to please misogynistic man to live happily.

Plenty of women already put up with unjust levels of shit and domestic inequality from ‘normal’ men. And these are the role models that ordinary boys are growing up with. Add in the online misogyny and it’s really scary.

I worry for the future generations of girls who don’t have pragmatic and protective parents.

It goes in circles. Periodically they like to tell us we're too big for our boots. It shows fear. They're scared of us becoming too powerful. Saddle up lads, it's happening anyway.

Getting this in before the men's rights bros find the thread. we can use it as a bingo card 😂

Interesting read and not something I’ve stumbled across in my feeds.

I work in a male industry and the sexism at work has increased a lot in the last year.

in fact, I’m almost 40 and hadn’t experienced it before 2023 :(

Also was minding my own business recently and a few Year 7’s or Year 8’s shouted abuse at me on their way home from school. Called me Karen and told me to go home and stay home where I belong.

I have young boys, so am a bit worried!

I wouldn't worry too much. High school boys were already disgusting in the 90s and I can see not much has changed. I never dated anyone from my high school.

The good men changed and found partners and the shitty ones either never did or only had very short relationships. People learn what works and a small minority remain stuck in their own ignorance.

The balance is currenly lost with a significant number of men being more openly disdainful of women again, but such extremes always get pushback and at some point the pendulum will swing back again.

It was on the news and they said 1 in 12 women will be a victim of male violence each year.
Misogyny I see online regularly is that if a man expresses an opinion that's fine, but if a woman expresses an opinion she's a Karen, or future Karen if a child. Sadly women often join in with this. It's all part of women being treated as inferior and worthy of derision and mistreatment by certain types.

And sadly I can almost guarantee someone will be along on this thread to justify women being derided as Karens for expressing an opinion.

The problem is men are making this work by forming unity and backing each other up as bros, kings etc and sadly a lot of women would rather stand with them than against them so they are turning men and woman against woman.

The more womens rights are codified and protected, the more male privilege is protected in other ways - it goes underground, or comes out in other ways. It is making me so afraid of the future - not for myself, I am too old to worry, but for all the young women who should be looking forward to wonderful futures, and instead are dealing with these horrible, horrible ideas.

Apart from me, how many of you have actually disowned your misogynistic sons?

It has been ever this, internalised misogyny oils the wheels of patriarchy.