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Original poster

toddler...newborn...and a puppy ?

77 replies

AnxietyLevelMax · 22/07/2024 14:42

Hi All,

So my husband and I have been thinking about getting a puppy for over a year now. We didn't want to rush it when he was working away from 5am till 8pm. but he has much better job now for almost a year (no crazy hours) and currently are going through a vetting for a different position which could lead up to even better hours than now.

We have decided this is it. we will be getting a puppy, we will take some time off each from work for a training etc. we have told our 3.5yr old toddler who is over the moon...and BOOM...I am pregnant again :)

Has anyone dealt with a newborn, toddler, new puppy and found it all manageable? We are thinking of getting one but before or right after baby is due, not now as we would not like to take any unnecessary holidays.

Are we crazy to even think about it ?

just to add...both of us always had dogs, grew up with dogs, and having a dog is nothing new to us, but it was all before we became a family. in my case I had my grandmom living with us (my parents and siblings) so we did not have any issues with separation anxiety or leaving it with someone during holidays..

OP posts:
Hugesunflower · 22/07/2024 14:44

I think you’re crazy to get a puppy with a toddler as it’s unfair on both of them, never mind with a new born thrown in the mix

OutdatedOutrage · 22/07/2024 14:45

Crazy.
Our dog was a very well trained 2.5 years old when our first was born and we actually contemplated rehoming her because of the amount of work a baby was when the dog needed 2/3 walks a day, playing with, poop scooping the garden, feeding etc etc.

MumChp · 22/07/2024 14:45

Wouldn't do it. Not a puppy. An older dog maybe.

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Comedycook · 22/07/2024 14:45

That's sounds like a terrible idea. Why do some people seem so keen to make their life as hard as possible?

Babychewtoy · 22/07/2024 14:48

Don’t do it. I have a super chilled baby, but combined with toddler it’s hard work and occasionally hell on earth.

Mrsjayy · 22/07/2024 14:49

So pregnancy a toddler and a puppy? How are you going to manage if say puppy wants out toddlers nappy needs changed and you have an urgency to pee . That's 1 of the many ways in how this is a terrible idea .

FatmanandKnobbin · 22/07/2024 14:50

That sounds like a nightmare.

You'll be distracted by the baby, and have a toddler and a teething bitey puppy, being up through the night and having to be constantly training a pup and dealing with a toddler who's world has just been turned on its head.

I waited until my youngest was 6 and fairly sensible, and it's still been bloody hard work.

LER83 · 22/07/2024 14:51

Nope, terrible idea! Having a puppy is like having a baby, except they poo and wee all over the house, and try and chew everything insight! Whose going to stand outside in the middle of the night getting puppy to toilet when you've already been up half the night with a baby? And not to mention taking puppy outside every 30 mins to toilet. Wait until the baby is at least in preschool/nursery. And i say this as someone who has a 5 month old puppy! My youngest is 8 and it's still been a struggle!

Vaccinationqueries · 22/07/2024 14:51

Don’t get the puppy. Wait a few years 100%

user1471538275 · 22/07/2024 14:53

No. You need to prioritise managing a newborn, your toddler and their relationship.

You do not need to be distracted by another baby dog who will have their own profound needs.

Someone will get left out - and that is not fair.

HurdyGurdy19 · 22/07/2024 14:54

Nope, because that poor dog will be dumped in a rehoming centre within six months, through no fault of its own.

I don't think people realise how much work is involved in looking after a puppy, let alone when the dog hits adolescence at about three years of age.

Please don't do it.

Mrsjayy · 22/07/2024 14:56

Your 3 year old won't really understand time scale so you can absolutely wait to get a dog.

Allthehorsesintheworld · 22/07/2024 14:58

You’ll be spreading yourself very thin. Puppies are hard work. Housetraining then training and socialisation. Daily exercise, vet visits, ( lots in the early days for vaccinations) you need to cater for holidays. And the fact that your dog could easily live to be 16 years old.
I’ve always had dogs and I’m very realistic about how tying they are.

MidnightPatrol · 22/07/2024 14:58

I wouldn’t do this.

I have an older dog which we had for years pre-kids, and trying to fit in kids routines around baby and toddler routines is difficult. Especially when alone.

Just so many demands on your time.

I’d wait.

circular2478 · 22/07/2024 15:02

Awful idea. A puppy is hard work and can take a long time to train. I think taking 'some time off work' is unrealistic. You need a lot of time off work. Add in a newborn and a toddler, no way.

Original poster
AnxietyLevelMax · 22/07/2024 15:04

thank you all. I have posted a similar on Facebook at a dog group for a breed we are thinking of getting and 95% answers were completely opposite. Crazy!

fyi - i also have a husband so its not only on my shoulders :)

we will definitely think little more before committing to this change

OP posts:
BeingATwatItsABingThing · 22/07/2024 15:07

We considered getting a dog when I was pregnant with DD2. We came to our senses and I have never been more grateful for that!

We have dog sat for a friend a few times. The first time was a week in the summer and it was great. We took the dog everywhere and had a lovely time on long walks. The second time was two weeks in October and it rained the whole time. That was not fun and all of the dog friendly places were outside! It made us realise that, whilst we like dogs, we don’t really want our own.

Look after a friend’s puppy for a week and see just how much hard work they are. Then x1000 and you will understand the toddler/baby/puppy dynamic!

Babychewtoy · 22/07/2024 15:08

Even if you do decide you want to go ahead I would definitely wait to see what kind of baby you get. I’m making an assumption that you didn’t get a screamy colicky one first time round if you’re even contemplating this!

longdistanceclaraclara · 22/07/2024 15:09

We got our puppy when I was 8 weeks pregnant with DTs. I would not have wanted to do it the other way around!

JumpstartMondays · 22/07/2024 15:12

So you'll have newborn nappies to change, new puppy to toilet train and a 3.5 toilet regression (when new sibling arrives) all at the same time?

I hope you don't have carpets!

But no, I wouldn't do it.

Original poster
AnxietyLevelMax · 22/07/2024 15:20

@Babychewtoy oh very clingy, always in my arms, reflux and colic all day long...second one must be easier, its only fair 😂

i am little bit shocked at the replies (also grateful) but how other families have puppies and dogs if it is that impossible 🙄

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 22/07/2024 15:22

Just wait!
For the love of god, just wait a couple of years.
Somebody is going to is out in this equation. The dog, baby, the toddler, you…
A friend has recently done something similar. They are both regretting it. There is talk of rehoming.
Just wait.

Original poster
AnxietyLevelMax · 22/07/2024 15:22

maybe a rabbit then? any experience? 😝 it would be lovely to have an animal!

OP posts:
Original poster
AnxietyLevelMax · 22/07/2024 15:23

i guess i might have a crying toddler and a husband if i decide against it now..😄

OP posts:
JumpstartMondays · 22/07/2024 15:25

I guess it depends how much help you have.

Does 3.5 yo go to nursery every day?
Is DH around all the time/WFH?
Do you have a garden?
Puppy trainer?
Cleaner?
Kindly grandparent to help out occasionally?

And similar related situations.