Would you let your 10 and 13 year old on London to Leeds train alone?

[Secondtonaan]

Dds 10 (nearly 11!) and 13 are staying with family in London for a couple of days in the summer hols.

We live in Leeds and an option is them getting the train from Kings X together if my mum sees them on the train at the station and I meet them off the train at Leeds.

They're both v sensible and have phones with trackers on. Would you do this?! I think so but seems a long way.

PoliteCritic
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You would then ring station staff and get them to help you”

🤣🤣🤣🤣

When was the last time that you actually “rang station staff and got them to help you”?

No, suspected not.

Just be aware that although you might book them on reserved seats if a train is cancelled the reservations are often removed and it's a total bunfight for seats.

Also the east coast mainline can be prone to issues with lines down & the like. What if it was a very delayed journey or the train finished at Doncaster & they couldn't find the connecting train in time & we're stuck in Donny for ages?

All unlikely but it happens x

It's tempting. Two 13 year olds or a 13 and 15 year old I think I would do it. But it's the 13 year old having to be responsible for the 10 year old that is too much in this case OP.
Too many things could go wrong - a falling out, reserved seats being cancelled, train being cancelled/delayed/diverted and I think that is too much for the 13 year old.to have to deal with.

A friend did similar with her 14 and 12 year olds - a shorter journey than London-Leeds but probably more complex with a change at major station, though a.commuter route. It was fine.

Yes I would if they are seen onto the train and being met at the end.
Your mum can ask to be let through the ticket barrier to put them on the train. I do this often to put my elderly mum onto a train - I make sure she has a seat and put her bag on the luggage rack then I get off.
If they have a drink and snack with them and their phone they'll be fine.

Yes, I would do this, absolutely.

I regularly travelled via intercity train to see my grandparents from about 10, with my little sister in tow, and this was long before the days of mobile phones.

13 and 10 is plenty old enough if they're sensible. If something goes wrong they can call you, surely?

I've just had to have a conversation with my 10yo who wanted to go on the bus to and from school for hlf an hour to an hour each way, on their own.

We worked out together that they aren't ready. We discussed what would you do if somebody sat next to you who made you feel uncomfortable, what if somebody tried to steal your phone, what if you missed your stop, or the bus broke down, a fight happened on the bus? All of these have happened on buses we have been on together.

We decided they weren't ready (I was already aware of this obviously)

So I would say no for the 10 year old. But 13 maybe. But I wouldn't leave the 13 in charge of the 10. I don't think that's fair.

I had to dig into this (concern for a relative) and the rail company were fairly clear that they wouldn't be happy to have children around that age travelling unaccompanied by an adult.

The guard located the relatives child and kept an eye on them (they had already been put on the train by their dad at this point).

Yes and I have sent my kids on similar journeys around those ages. I sent my son and his friend (both 11) on a 2 hour train journey from London to grandparents.

My daughter has been doing the same journey alone since around 11 years old every summer holidays.

But they know the train journey well, it only stops twice on the way and they are put on the train and picked up from the platform at the other end. Also track them on Life360 and talk to them several times during their journey.

Absolutely not.

Obviously if children have SEND it’s a completely different ball game and will vary wildly depending on their needs/condition and how it affects them. My AuDHD DS would not have panicked in this scenario, certainly by 13. My worry would him would have been more around an inability to spot danger. We are not taking about children with SEND here though unless the OP is intending on a massive drip feed!

Children of 11 travel unaccompanied on trains all the time so that’s a weird response from the train company.

Yes I would. As long as they stay together I really don't see an issue. Children these days are over protected and never get the opportunity to learn safety boundaries. Id say a train where they get on and off with supervision is a good start of their safe independence.

Blimey yes.
I'm surprised at the number of noes.

Don't do it. I was travelling on train from Gatwick to Victoria- a man in his late 30 / possibly early 40 sat in front of me and started making indecent facial expressions( with his tongue out), staring at me. It was just us sitting at the table and I was thinking WTF is happening , is he mentally unwell. I moved seats and he followed me. I had to move to the busier carriage. He made me feel extremely uncomfortable. I didn't challenge him because I was so shocked. There are some really sick people out. You never know. For context - I'm 5'2 , female. Nothing like that happened to me before.

100% no

@dontcryformeargentina horrible. But you can't avoid doing things because something happened once to you.

@PoliteCritic We are talking about children here. I'm definitely not avoiding trains or public transport after that incident.

I always wanted my children to be adventurous and brave. Nit to grow up into some of the adults I know who are frightened to do anything outside their comfort zone. I think that bravery has to be practised.

I'm surprised at so many 'No!''s

Maybe your mother could speak to train staff explaining as they get on. I'd do that, then I can't imagine there should be too much of a problem, as long as they're trustworthy which I'm sure they must be.

...and of course stay together no matter what- even go to the loo together. Stay in sight of each other at all times.

I got interconnecting flights in a brand new country at age 13 when my parents sent me off to stay with a friend so I would think sitting in a seat for 2 hours would be doable for these kids

Yes, provided they were taken to the train and met at the other end.

Not a chance. They are far too young.

When my DS was 17 he was on a train and an odd older man sat next to him and made him feel uncomfortable. D's said this mad clearly had an erection and kept putting his hand on his crotch. DS moved to another carriage. You can get some odd people on trains.

I used to commute by train (only 35 mins) I would estimate there were serious delays about once a month (reasonablyreguarly shorter delays). This could be all sorts of issues from lights, people on track, a jumper, technical, train breakdown etc. Some which meant you would disembark at a station that was not your start/end point. This would be hard to navigate for a young teen. Many stations are unmanned and the train guard is dealing with the issue plus will often have several hundred passengers. You would also sometimes get other passengers who were drunk, rowdy etc which could be scary for a child.

My children are similar ages (14/11) and I would allow local train travel where we would be able to be there quickly for an issue. I wouldn't allow such a long journey. There is more potential for an issue and would not be able to get to them quickly if needed.