Follow to keep up with a loner

[lonersjargon]

That's it really. I'm a loner and will be diarising here - about little things I'm up to. Not sure anyone in the world would be interested. But it is what it is.

I have too but it's all I've ever known really. Growing up, my parents mostly ignored me and I was left to entertain myself. They didn't have any friends and we never had family visit so I had no blueprint for socialising and struggled to make friends at school. I had to learn to be happy in my own company, sink or swim pretty much. So I'm not sure if my introversion is innate or if it's more to do with my upbringing and then subsequent experiences of people letting me down/taking the piss.

Animals are indeed wonderful companions. My cat follows me everywhere.

Fortunately the camera up the nose thing isn't as torturous as an endoscopy. I had to be knocked out for one of those.

I think it's probably a mix of both. My mum was very introverted and my dad was most likely undiagnosed autistic. I spent most of my childhood alone due to stuff going on in the house. I also had very few friends at school as I was so withdrawn. I lived in my head. I'm still socially awkward and I'm in my 40s.

Hopefully the procedure will be over quickly. Not nice having a camera shoved anywhere!

@lonersjargon Well done decorating and exercising!

@voiceofastar Hope you're okay.

Thanks for such a pleasant thread! It's lovely to read and hear about others news.

Great to read everyone is self-accepting and creating their own kind of meaning!
Exercise this morning was light as I'm easing into the treadmill again. I did 3km in 18mins.
I did some work and then went cycling. Tomorrow, I'm going to the gym again and then will go to the spa.
I'm currently sitting by a lake watching the floating ducks and swans. Whoever or whatever created nature must be an artist! It's just beautiful to see :)

Oh how nice! Exercise whiles away the time and it's great to watch nature :)

Oh, here you are! My people 🥰 I love you already. Let's have a huge joint wedding and all go live in a commune...not! 😅

I'm an accidental hermit. Health reasons, not wanting to do the efforts of social media to stay in touch, jaded with people in general. I'm focusing on being me and seeing what happens.

This thread is different, obviously. IRL if I know someone and like their company, I want to meet up one to one and chat (not excessively) whilst doing quiet peaceful things. I don't want to scroll through the fake edited highlights on FB or Insta, pretending we still like each other whilst never meeting up. It feels vacuous and completely pointless.

This ⬆️ will be the problem OP. Red is the danger signal. Poisonous things are often red. Things that want to pretend they're poisonous so nothing eats them are bright colours like red too. Birds like old birdhouses that have faded in the weather and gone a bit mossy and don't look new and are colours such as green or brown like trees and bushes. Summer there's lots of food usually. They'll come in autumn/winter. Different birds like different seeds I believe. And fat balls, which are balls made of fat with seeds in.

Morning all, hope you have a good day.

Good morning allaloneandlost I feel awful but I'm going to the park this afternoon in the hope that some time in nature and sunbathing will make me feel better. I hope you have a good day too.

Morning @HermityHermitage and thanks for replying. Well done for going. Hope you feel better and have a good day :)

@HermityHermitage hope your week is going well. I'm sorry about your health and thank you for the bird advice. Very enlightening. Sending you hugs

@allaloneandlost Hello! Hope you enjoy the rest of the week.

This week has been intense.
My mum's was ill, so that was scary.
Also had work deadlines which I have to meet.
Next week, I'm going hiking so looking forward to putting the world to rights then.
What's everyone looking forward to?

Hello All!

@lonersjargon Sorry to hear about your mum, hope things are better. It's all or nothing isn't it? Hope you're looking after yourself and hope the weather stays nice for you. Thanks for replying.

Had some good news. I've studied aromatherapy at college and received the certificate today. It's for personal interest and a hobby but in future might turn into a career change or extra income. I'm qualified in massage and other therapies so it's useful.

Thank you, lovely. Mum's better now and I'm trying to recharge as well.
Congratulations on receiving your certificate! Well done you. You must be very proud. It's nice that you have the knowledge and skills now. Whatever you decide to do with it, you'll excel at it. Massage + aromatherapy? That's a good income stream.
I ordered some oil online last week and it's made such a difference in my flat's ambience.
Any plans for making/mixing anything soon?

Thanks loanersjargon I feel better today. I'm mostly looking forward to having a good tidy up, things have got a bit chaotic here and I need to clean off some mould too. Good luck with those deadlines.

Congratulations on passing the course allaloneandlost 😁

@lonersjargon Glad your mum's better. You can relax and enjoy hiking now without the worry. So many nice places to go! Hope you get those deadlines done. Scent improves mood and relaxes or invigorates depending.

Thanks very much and haven't mixed anything yet as looking to buy some oils. It's like being a chemist and is very interesting.

@HermityHermitage Hope you managed the cleaning. It's nice when it's done. Thanks very much!

Long post so I apologise in advance ❤️

@allaloneandlost Sorry for the late reply. My mum's health threw me off and I've been so overwhelmed by it and everything else but thank goodness she has recovered pretty well. Hope you are well.

So, I went hiking and it was amazing. I was at one with nature. Has anyone experienced this feeling before?

Some other updates-- I'm still waiting for birds to spot my bird house although I should repaint it earthy like someone kindly advised.

Remember I was at the Lake sometime ago? Well, a man came up to speak to me then. I'll call him Mr Big. We've since been on two dates and he is in touch with me everyday. I have never had that in my life. Again, has anyone experienced this before? I have also been very overwhelmed by this but I have managed to not freak out and now I'm getting used to it and I actually appreciate that there is someone who checks in with me.

Also, went on the hike with some friends. Hike was led by one whom I'll call Miss Sunshine. I think of Miss Sunshine as a social rescue for neurodivergents. She's very outgoing and I have noticed that all her friends are special like me and she is very protective of us all but also helps us with relating to the world better.

Miss Sunshine thinks that Mr Big likes me. I did not realise that. So, that was an eye opener and that helped me in dealing with the overwhelming feeling when he used to text me regularly when I just met him.
Miss Sunshine also spruced up my dating profile - took nice photos and rewrote the bio. Apparently, my old photos looked serious. So, in the new profile I have photos where Miss sunshine made me smile while doing various things such as cycling and smiling, hiking and smiling, being with the hiking group and smiling. I am now showing more teeth when smiling. Don't know what I'm doing half the time, just following Miss Sunshine's directives. 😂
To my surprise, my dating profile went on fire. Over 250 likes!
I matched with a few because that's all I can handle and have filtered them to three that I'm now talking to. And I now have two set up dates. Can you believe that? I've not been on a date in a long time. I've been single for a decade at this point.

On the house front, things are looking better. I bought a sofa. I invited Mr Big round for tea and thought he may need somewhere to sit and I only had one arm chair in my living room. My previous thinking was why have more than one chair if no one comes to my house? So far, this has been a huge change in my setup.
I've also had to buy an extra mug and cutlery. Previously I had one plate, one fork, one mug, one tea spoon etc. You sort of get the picture. I designed my life for one.
Still anxious about Mr Big visiting for tea. But I am psyching myself up to do it.

Hope everyone has had a great week. Sending you lots of ❤️

I'm a loner. Apart from my husband and kids, I don't have a social network.
However I work in a people facing role, which is ironic considering I'm not a fan of people

Greetings, wishing you a good day.

Hello fellow loner
I'd like to get away from the idea that all loners are weirdos or unhappy. Nothing wrong with liking your own company and being independent. Am interested in your day. There's a lovely breeze blowing through the bedroom window after a night of rain, smells fresh. The rest of the world is still asleep so it's just me and the birds chirping at the moment. Bliss!

The lake guy definitely likes you OP 😁. Congratulations on your dating profile going crazy. You must look like a fun loving, fit and healthy, outdoorsy type. I guess that must be popular right now! Hopefully you meet someone suitable. You could ask lake guy on a date too, unless you want to see how it goes with the others first.

I love being in nature too. Feel all the worries of the world melt away and get rejuvenated. I don't do it as much as I ought to.

I got a bird box this spring but nobody nested in it yet.

Hi miss I'm a bit weird but not unhappy. Weird is fine, as is not weird, too. I'm only weird in some people's eyes. Some people do things I think are weird and I wouldn't want their lifestyle even though they seem to like it. Best we all be ourselves. It depends where you live anyway, what's usual in your country isn't necessarily what's usual in someone else's country. So weirdness is subjective.

You seem to have the best network for you - the husband and kids!

Yes, I think loners can be alone but not lonely. And being able to be okay in one's own company is a life skill. Glad to hear you are having a great morning. And the birds chirping... sounds perfect.

So I realised! And now I like him back. Haha. Although he has not told me explicitly that he likes me and I have not told him either. Yes, I am fun loving and active although I prefer to do my activities on my own but I am open to now doing bits with good people here and there. Maybe I'll ask Mr Big on a date next time and still see how it goes with the others. Mr Big has kids whilst the others do not, but Mr Big is more mature and communicative I think.

Pleased to hear you experience that at-one-with-nature feeling too. And I agree, weirdness is subjective. Have a great day, lovely.

@lonersjargon Thanks so much for replying and glad your mum's better! Well that sounds like a great holiday, nature is thrilling. You deserved it after all that work. Sorry for the late reply, been away as well.

It's all or nothing. You've been alone for years now a few romantic interests! Mr Big sounds intriguing. Did he come around? Don't know if you believe in Feng Shui but your flat with solitary items is supposed to keep you solitary, whereas you're designing your life to include somebody.

Any news on the birds? How's your week been?

Loads of love to all :)