AIBU: sex offender at my social gathering

[HoppyFish]

Hi folks. Not sure this is the best place to post this but I value your advice. I have been going to a nice life drawing session for years. Nothing sexual about it, it's more of a social gathering, with music, a cuppa, bit of food, and drawing/painting with fellow artists. However, there's a man, in his sixties, not a professional artist, who makes me uneasy. He is always quick to befriend any young female attendees or models, and invites them to his studio or home for photoshoots (for portrait work) and possibly painting. I suppose some people would describe him as a 'creep'. He never asks males, middle-aged or older women. He also sometimes stops drawing early, moves position, and sits staring at the model (when female) as if in a trance. Now, I suppose there is nothing wrong in any of this - an amateur artist wanting to paint portraits maybe wants to specialise in young females. And maybe when staring at the model without drawing he is simply studying anatomy or light and shadow. Anyway, my uneasiness led me to do a little online research on him, and I have discovered that he was jailed for downloading indecent images and mainly videos of children, levels 1 (most serious) to 5, involving men having sex with girls, aged between 2 and 9. He was jailed for a year and spent 10 years on the register. I expect he came off the register around four years ago. I think I am the only one who knows this, and it makes me feel even more uneasy about him. But is there anything to be concerned about? All the models and attendees at the life drawing session are over eighteen. I suppose I should just let him get on with his hobby, but I can't help continuing to feel uneasy, especially when I see him swapping numbers with every new young woman who he encounters. I expect they are impressed by the 'portrait artist' wanting to paint them, but I wonder if they would be keen to pose for him if they knew what I knew, and if they knew he never seems to produce any finished paintings? Am I being unreasonable? Thanks for your time.

You've got to be kidding?? The man is a pervert, and is into videos of child rape do you seriously think people will think op is gossiping if she warns them? Bloody hell!
What if he's trying to get access to kids through people in the group They don't change these people whether he's done his time or not people have a right to know.
Op please let them know, he could be trying to gain access to children he's as dodgy as hell.

I would be very worried if the women have young children. I would report your concerns to the organiser. Very worrying OP.

I suppose it depends what you said to the neighbour, but absolutely nobody would get to tell me that I couldn't notify peoplle about something like this, providing I stuck to the known facts

Also agree with everyone who's said to have a discreet word with the class leader and take it from there

I am glad you are going to tell the organiser. He is a convicted paedophile, images and videos are often described as "just pics/vids" but someones child is in those videos and pictures, someones childs life is ruined so these sick fucks can watch and share these pictures and videos.
The sentencing of these nonces is a joke!

sex offenders never change they are always looking for the vulnerable regardless of them no longer being on the register or under probation etc

there is simply too many of them about for services to manage

agree reporting to the organiser of the best way forward

Just because he served his time doesn't mean he now deserves an easy life where he can, and likely will, continue to have these feelings and perhaps even act on them as he has done in the past. He's a piece of shit and he deserves to feel uncomfortable, awkward, unsure, nervous, never settled for the rest of his miserable life.

@AngryLikeHades I'm so sorry.

Rapists and paedos should either be locked away for life or burned. They can't be rehabilitated nor do they deserve to be.

Serving a shitty little amount of time doesn't fix or undo or rehabilitate anything.

Report me but I'd gladly vote for lethal injection for paedophiles.

Glad you've decided to let the organisers know about this pervert. However, if they choose not to take any action, please find a way to spread the word.
My young niece is an aspiring art student who attends a life drawing class and I would 100% want to know if someone like this was also attending. Fucking creep.

Have a word with yourself.

@MrsSunshine2b I twitched when I saw that ‘low self esteem ‘ remark. The models I have had the privilege of drawing have been professional and confident - able to make their own suggestions for poses, for comfort, to indicate if they need a break or a drink of water or heat if the leader has been dilatory in checking etc.

I think some posters on here who haven’t been in a class or group session have a mental image of something that is sleazy, almost sub soft porn. Models are very careful re their genital area - no legs akimbo and I’ve never seen an erection on a male model. It’s a distinctly un sexually charged atmosphere.

The first time I attended a session, years ago, there was a moment of ‘oh, that’s naked totally undressed nude person there ‘ but it was over quickly and on to work.

Thank you to you and your fellow models.

Have you read the thread?

Yes. Have you? You don't seem to have??

HTH

The one concern I have here is the possibility of mistaken identity. If you end up ruin the public reputation of completely the wrong guy, the consequences for you and him could be devastating. So by all means go to the organisers and tell them your suspicions, but it has to be up to them to do the diligence to establish that this is in fact the same person before taking action. They may have his home address, DoB, etc to corroborate with other records. I'm sure it's probably him, but we are all fallible and the stakes are too high for this to be done on the say-so of one person. (If he's called Zebediah Farquhar-Cholmondleigh or something then that's pretty good odds, but there are lots of Barry Roberts out there.)

They wouldn’t be accusing him of anything. They would be informing their colleagues of the facts regarding his prior convictions, so that they could then decide for themselves whether they feel comfortable associating with him.

Women in their twenties and thirties often have young children. Though of course this could be of no interest to a person convicted of online child sex abuse………

Tell the person in charge. It's then up to the to decide how to handle it.

I'm relieved to read that. What he's doing is at best, creepy, at worst predatory & grooming.

Thanks @PCBabies.
The police are mainly rubbish. They don't make it easy for vulnerable people to report cases. I've had to go and find help myself mainly and it takes considerable effort and bravery to acquire it. I get help from a charity that help those with sexual violence, but I've had to mainly research it myself and make appointments and such. The sexual abuse is almost all within my family but my dad's friend used to talk to me sexually from when I was 12 years old. I reported it to the police recently and they looked a bit fucking nonplussed. I've had to really push for more support and I've got awful mental health issues.
OP, if you can report it, do because it will make it easier for people like me. Thanks xxx

I would expect them to kick him out of the class.

And I would expect you to find a different hobby than defending pedophiles on the internet.

All these people saying he's done his time, he's an adult in an adult environment, etc. what would you say if you found out that someone in your hobby group, workplace or anywhere close to you was found to be a convicted paedophile? Would you want to still have him around you? Would you still be fine around him? I know I wouldn't so I would want to know. These vile men ruin so many lives, yet they are allowed to just carry on doing whatever they want and have loads of people defending them it's crazy!

People massively overestimate a woman's ability to defend herself. A man in his 60s would still easily overpower a woman in her 30s. Especially while alone in his home.

The teacher.

And not every one reacts the same way. When talking like this we all say that we would fight our way out. But some people freeze in fear, and cannot help them selves. Its better to avoid such an event before it happens.

These people should never be taken off the register. Is he trying to befriend these women in the hope that they might have young children?

I would absolutely alert the course leader to what you’ve discovered. He’s not wired up right so while his conviction might be ‘spent’, he is and always will be a disgusting paedophile.

Really? You appear to not even have read the OP:

"He was jailed for a year and spent 10 years on the register. I expect he came off the register around four years ago."

and you then said:

"I would inform the police and they will intervene. He must be breaking bail conditions"

So, having been sentenced to 12 months he would have spent 6 months in prison and then 6 months on licence (while on licence he would have had a Probation Officer).

So, Probation have had no interest or contact with him for the last 13.5 years and the police have had no contact with him for around the last four years.

Did you really not bother to read the OP?