Bedwetting

[Curlywurly78]

Hello, my 6.5yr old really wants to stop wearing a nappy. We’ve been trying at night but she just doesn’t wake up and wees. I know it might take till 7yr old to produce hormone. But she really wants to stop and would like to support her. Just shelled out £100 on a bed wetting alarm and wanted to know what people’s experiences have been?

thank you!

Our DC is 5 and we lift him around of bed around 22:30 and take him to pee in a half asleep state. At some point we will stop but I’d rather do it when it’s warmer and it’s easier to do the washing. Hes just not able to hold it for the whole night.

Could that work? Obviously it depends on whether you can carry her.

Take a look at ERIC.org.uk lots of helpful advice to get you started

https://www.bedwettingandaccidents.com/blog

Ahh thankyou for these replies - I looked at the Eric site and that’s where I thought alarm might work as she is such a deep sleeper. I tried taking her when I went to bed later in the night but there was no budging her she was sleeping so soundly! Well… we’ve talked about the bed wet alarm tonight and she is pretty excited about it! Just hope she doesn’t keep fiddling about with it and gets to sleep! Must feel a bit strange having a small plastic thing down there. It’s a wireless one so no wires. Will see how that goes - wish me luck! Thankyou

Hi @Curlywurly78 how did it go with the alarm? Our DD is similar- incredibly deep sleeper and just doesnt ever wake up to wee. I’ve considered using the alarm but I can well imagine her sleeping through that too!

Hi there! Well, first night we heard the alarm go off at about 6am she was upset/shocked by the whole thing as was fast asleep. She didn’t want to get up as we’d practised as she was weeing and couldn’t stop. After a cuddle and calm down and reassurance etc she was happy to let us change her and the bed and got back to sleep.
She said in the morning she didn’t want the alarm again but then by evening she was open to the idea - she had a choice of alarm or pull up so she chose the alarm. So then last night I woke up about 4am and was snoozing from then on as wondering if the alarm will go off again. Well, it didn’t and she woke in a dry bed, happy girl! I guess will see how things go each night, I’ll give it 2 weeks with the alarm - as long as she is happy to use it. She definitely doesn’t want pull ups anymore so hoping this will help.
from the info I read it looked like an alarm is best for kids that aren’t waking but if you hear or read about anything else - please do let me know - I might need a plan b!

I used an alarm with DD1 at 6.5, it was a great success. It took a couple of weeks though, no results for first few nights so good to manage her expectations so she isn’t disappointed. I said the machine would help teach her brain to wake up but it takes a while. Once she was dry though, she continued to wake at night to pee, for a long time. This led me to conclude that there’s little you can do about the hormone but that the wetting without waking can be trained. DD1 is 8.5 now and still does have regressions sometimes when she has a cold, she had a long regression last year after a uti. She wouldn’t use the alarm after that and was prescribed desmopressin by Gp - that helped. I’m not convinced she makes the hormone even now.

DD2 is 5.5 in the same position and wants to try the alarm. I’m just bracing myself for a few weeks of disrupted sleep beside her - it’s a thought. Your DD may be different but mine needed a lot of help to even wake with the alarm! I’m going on but feel free to ask anything.

We had the same problem with my daughter, only ever at night and used an alarm when she was about 4. (She’s now 18!! ) She slept so very deeply. I really wasn’t expecting it to do much but it worked like absolute witchcraft. Not sure how or why it worked so well but it did. We only had to use it for a very short time (probably a couple of weeks at the very most) and she never had a single accident afterwards. Still can’t fathom how it worked or maybe it was just a fluke, but definitely worth a try.

Thanks all. Sounds like you’re making progress already @Curlywurly78!

im interested in what you say re still waking to wee @Beginningless as I’m pretty sure our DD is still weeing more than once a night - and for that reason too I’m a bit cautious about using rhe alarm. What if she ends up waking multiple times a night and getting terribly tired as a result? Ho hum. Might give it a go over the summer hols and see.

Night number 3 and another dry one! Never had 2 dry nights in a row before ….. she is happy and pleased with herself. I’m wondering if it works on some level of conditioning as the loudness of the alarm and weeing at the same time was really awful for her first night - perhaps her body is trying to avoid that happening again! Anyway, early days so will see how it goes ….

My 7yo is still wet most nights. The most annoying bit is we can't find a pull up that works so every night I'm changing the sheets. We did the bedwetting alarm about a year ago and it worked short term but then he slept through it and reverted back. He's a deep sleeper. We've recently been referred by dr so see how long that takes. I was hoping the hormone would've kicked in by now but not the case for us. I have heard success stories with the alarm though so fingers crossed it works for you.

This is what happened when we used an alarm all those years ago, my husband reminded me like you after one or two nights, she just became dry and that was that. No idea how/why it works. So glad you’re having a positive result too x

Yeh I’ve been reading that too from 7yrs the hormone is meant to start. It maybe takes a while for it to start and to build up? Also I’m not sure if there are gender differences or if it’s the same for girls and boys. My friend’s 7.5yr old daughter wets and she has to have two pull ups as she produces quite a bit in the night. I think she was waiting till they could seek medical advice as I think different areas might have different criteria. Either way I think there are some methods to try to support. The school nurses wanted GP to rule anything out before accepting any referral.
Hope you and your son get some good helpful advice - even if it’s reassurance to wait for nature to take its course! Take care x

Following with interest as my 5 year old is desperate to be dry (his two year old brother stopped wearing a nappy nearly a year ago at night and he’s now adament he doesn’t need one). I rang Eric to discuss the best type of alarm but their phone line isn’t manned and i missed their call back several days later.

My son is the same - a wee doesn’t wake him. We wake him up for a wee around 10 and 4-5am. He still sometimes has little accidents.

My heartbreaks for him as he finds it really embarrassing and will change his pants and pretend he’s been dry.

We use the mats on the bed and they’re brilliant. I have 3 that I just switch so it’s less hassle than a full bed change. Unless of course the duvet gets wet too 😩

@QueenApple1 thanks. We do have the mats but it tends to spread further than they cover and somehow always manages to wet the duvet too. It just irritates me that he has a pull up and it doesn't work properly!

I had a phone call with the paediatric continence team yesterday regarding my 9y/o and they advised that the alarm can take up to three months to have the desired effect. It's not just about waking them when they're wet, it's about creating the association between their brain and the feeling of "needing to go/waking up" so I'd consider giving it more than two weeks before deciding whether it's successful for your LO

Ahh great - thankyou for letting me know this, good to have a longer view in mind.
Hope you’re able to get some good help for your 9yr old

@Curlywurly78 thank you! You too. I'd be interested to know how you get on with the alarm longer term too. My daughter is at the stage where the bed wetting is becoming quite distressing and embarrassing for her and it feels we've been going round in circles to try and get her adequate support.

Hi - it’s difficult isn’t it when they are insistent to not wear a pull up! My one told me tonight if we can sell/give away her bag of pull ups!
I tried calling ERIC too and yeh it’s not a manned line. I read some bits on website. I paid out for the wireless alarm as didn’t like the idea of wires. My daughter is a deep sleeper too - seems to be doing something, not sure what but it’s day 4 tonight!

A great bit of advice I read on here years ago - layer up to the bed so you have waterproof sheet, normal sheet, waterproof sheet, normal sheet etc. That way if they have an accident you just strip the top layer off and there's already a fresh set ready to go. We're training a 5yo and a 9yo atm and that has been a godsend in the early hours!

Yes no problem I’ll post again with an update. It’s awful when they feel upset about it too isn’t it. I’ve been so surprised at how poor the support channels are for parents and perhaps there are regional differences too. I also don’t think it’s something talked about much in groups of parents - apart from on here where it’s good to share with some honesty.

My now 9yr old was over 7 when she became dry at night. We tried twice with a bed wetting alarm. The first time it worked, but only in that it was waking her mid wee, or she was so conscious of the potential of it going off that she wasn't sleeping as deeply. It was making her tired and I couldn't be doing with the laundry so we stopped and had a break. The second time she cracked it after a couple of nights and has never had an accident since. So my advice is to wait until she's ready rather than trying to force it. I remember how aware of it she was, and how sad it made her, especially with a younger sister who has been dry at night since the age of 3.

Alarms won’t work if the child is producing lots of urine overnight as the body’s hormone vasopressin hasn’t kicked in to reduce urine production. If your child is soaking the bed then desmopressin medication is often the answer. I know this after my son got dry at aged 10. 6 months on medication and then he was dry.

Yes - I’ve been doing this with mine with the sheets and it’s great! I read this in Sarah Ockwell Smith book ‘the gentle potty training book’ it’s got a section on night training. However again, if u have a deep sleeper or a child that produces a lot of urine the methods might need a bit more support