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Original poster

Are you selfish with food?

96 replies

Dollenganger333 · 23/05/2024 08:23

In my household, we will all give away our last rolo, so to speak. Except for dd2. Ever since she was a toddler, she does not like sharing food with anyone and did things like take the box of Christmas chocolates to school and hide them in her locker 🤣. She’s a lovely girl in other ways and nobody is perfect.

But, she’s the only NT person in our household. Which got me thinking that ime most people don’t like sharing food do they? Or am I wrong?

OP posts:
soupfiend · 23/05/2024 08:24

No Im not a natural sharer

soupfiend · 23/05/2024 08:25

Not sure what being NT has to do with anything though

InheritedClock · 23/05/2024 08:27

Some people do, some people don’t. I grew up in a household where there was never quite enough food to go round, so mealtimes were stressful and competitive with my siblings. To this day, I don’t like ‘sharing plates’ scenarios where I don’t know how much food is mine.

MWNA · 23/05/2024 08:27

I hate sharing anything. I'm neurodivergent to the max.

Original poster
Dollenganger333 · 23/05/2024 08:29

soupfiend · 23/05/2024 08:25

Not sure what being NT has to do with anything though

It might not have anything to do with it at all - I was making an observation about my household.

OP posts:
JosiePosey · 23/05/2024 08:30

Depends what it is and who wants it 😂

SomePosters · 23/05/2024 08:31

soupfiend · 23/05/2024 08:25

Not sure what being NT has to do with anything though

Neither is the op… that’s why they asked

RubySloth · 23/05/2024 08:32

I will share my husband but not my last rolo 😂

mondaytosunday · 23/05/2024 08:34

Im happy to give my DD (only family member I live with) the bigger slice/portion, and yes my last Rolo too. But no one else.

KohlaParasaurus · 23/05/2024 08:46

Not at all, but if food became a limited resource I expect I'd become very selfish with it.

Sunnyandsilly · 23/05/2024 08:48

Isn’t the question why she does it? Clearly she thinks she’s not going to get her share, that someone will have it, so she needs to do this. That’s what to address.

MaryBethMayfair · 23/05/2024 08:49

Because the rest of your household is happy to share, has it possibly become a bit of a free for all? People just take what they fancy without any consideration for who it belonged to or whether they had plans for it. Maybe that doesn't bother the rest but bothers your DD.

Original poster
Dollenganger333 · 23/05/2024 08:50

MaryBethMayfair · 23/05/2024 08:49

Because the rest of your household is happy to share, has it possibly become a bit of a free for all? People just take what they fancy without any consideration for who it belonged to or whether they had plans for it. Maybe that doesn't bother the rest but bothers your DD.

No, that doesn’t happen at all.

OP posts:
Chickenuggetsticks · 23/05/2024 08:51

Yes all share (Dd a bit more cagey and expects to asked first, which is fair enough) all NT as well.

minipie · 23/05/2024 08:51

In our family I would say the main thing is fairness

If someone wants to be generous and give away their rolo that’s very nice, but never expected

What is absolutely expected is sharing treats equally. No taking more than your fair share. I was horrified by the 8 biscuit-snaffling husband on the recent thread 😆

Sunnyandsilly · 23/05/2024 08:54

Dollenganger333 · 23/05/2024 08:50

No, that doesn’t happen at all.

Show quote history

Then you need to address why she thinks it does. As logically she’s not be doing this if she thought her food would be left alone for her,

Original poster
Dollenganger333 · 23/05/2024 08:56

Sunnyandsilly · 23/05/2024 08:54

Then you need to address why she thinks it does. As logically she’s not be doing this if she thought her food would be left alone for her,

Show quote history

I think you’re wrong because we don’t live in a household where food is ever not freely available and the behaviour is specifically around things like chocolates and cake etc.

OP posts:
CocoapuffPuff · 23/05/2024 08:57

I'm from a large family and fair shares is very important to me. As a kid, I hid my share of treats if I didn't want to eat it immediately, as otherwise one of my siblings would scoff it. Fairness is essential but if I choose to give away my share, I'm very happy to do so.
Has your dds share been snaffled by a sibling a few times? Or has she had her lunch nicked at school? I suspect she's had a lesson like that at one time or another, and chooses now to hide her treats till she actually wants them.

Original poster
Dollenganger333 · 23/05/2024 08:57

CocoapuffPuff · 23/05/2024 08:57

I'm from a large family and fair shares is very important to me. As a kid, I hid my share of treats if I didn't want to eat it immediately, as otherwise one of my siblings would scoff it. Fairness is essential but if I choose to give away my share, I'm very happy to do so.
Has your dds share been snaffled by a sibling a few times? Or has she had her lunch nicked at school? I suspect she's had a lesson like that at one time or another, and chooses now to hide her treats till she actually wants them.

But she has been like this since she was about 2 lol.

OP posts:
CocoapuffPuff · 23/05/2024 08:58

Do you think older kids won't nick chocolate from a baby?

CocoapuffPuff · 23/05/2024 09:00

Anyway, putting the search for reasons aside, if she's just hiding her own share and not stashing away treats belonging to anyone else, or stealing, I don't think there's much of a problem.

NowYouSee · 23/05/2024 09:00

When you say “the box of Christmas chocolates” was this a communal food source or was this a box of chocs she had been given as a present? Because I think those two situations are pretty different in terms of appropriateness of what she did.

Revelatio · 23/05/2024 09:01

We all share, even the 3yr old. The 3yr old is a bit of a feeder actually, will try and force things on you even if you don’t want it!!

Momstermunch · 23/05/2024 09:04

I don't think most people are like your dd, no. My kids vary in how much they will share but none of them hide or lock away their food. That's pretty unusual. We are a NT household by the way.

DavidRosesEyebrows · 23/05/2024 09:10

CocoapuffPuff · 23/05/2024 08:57

I'm from a large family and fair shares is very important to me. As a kid, I hid my share of treats if I didn't want to eat it immediately, as otherwise one of my siblings would scoff it. Fairness is essential but if I choose to give away my share, I'm very happy to do so.
Has your dds share been snaffled by a sibling a few times? Or has she had her lunch nicked at school? I suspect she's had a lesson like that at one time or another, and chooses now to hide her treats till she actually wants them.

My dad is the youngest of seven and it took him until about his mid fifties to stop gobbling down his dinner at record speed or hiding any nice chocolates/biscuits he got 😂

Since grandkids came along I think he's learnt how to actually enjoy sharing food though.