if you were still with your first love...what would your life be like?

[BigDahliaFan]

My very first love was an eco warrior type, who camped out in the woods and didn't really drink.

I've changed and I'm sure he has too, but none of that is me!

Got together aged 15, still together (and happy) 22 years later!

Living in Australia after living in various places abroad. Possibly not with children as he and his wife adopted late in life, although I don't know if it was him who had fertility problems. At 60 he does look alarmingly like his late father though.

Fine but a bit meh, he was a nice guy and I got on with his family but we just drifted when we went to different unis.

Pretty miserable. Obviously people change quite a lot in 25 years, but at 22 there were no extremes of discomfort he wouldn’t tolerate in the interest of avoiding a decent day’s work.

Celibate. A few years later he came out 😁

I’d be in a sexless marriage after realising I was gay well into my 20s! I could have maybe made allowances on special occasions but the poor bloke would have been miserable with me. He was lovely too!

I would be living in an Italian village. Would definitely have been a better choice than the looser I spent 25 years of my life with. We reconnected last year when we were both going through acrimonious divorces, but decided the distance would be difficult. He has since met someone, but I will always hold a place in my heart for him.

It would be complicated, considering he’s now married to a man.

Similar here - although I haven't seen him for 30 years so no idea whether he still is or what he's doing. Strangely though he still pops up in my dreams sometimes.

I would’ve been a military wife probably living in Europe.

im still sad that it didn’t turn out that way, maybe cause 30 years later I’ve never had a long term relationship that lasted or was right for me. 😢

That's a thought! I'd most likely be dead. He's world famous now so I never stop hearing about him and how wonderful he is, etc. But he would not have been good for me at all. Chronic cheater, hot and cold, narcissistic.

I would probably be dead, he was violent, controlling and emotionally abusive. His wife he went on to marry died unexpectedly with a verdict of ‘misadventure’, after she died he tried to get in touch with me again. I worry about what happened to her.

A farmer's wife with five kids!!! Lucky escape for someone who has never wanted children... 😅 The fields and sheep and Aga looked romantic to me as a gormless young women, but with age I can see how hard-worked and taken for granted farmers' wives can be...

But worse, I would have lived within a mile of my narc mother and never got away... it took 20 years abroad to break that pattern, and I can see what havoc she's wreaked on the 'control group' of my siblings... grateful every day... 🙏

I love how you express that... 😄

I’d be extremely sexually unsatisfied.

Not seen him for decades though so no idea where he lives or what sort of job he has.

Bonus points - he was a good cook 😁.

I would be miserable, he was/still is an alcoholic who regularly cheated on me and was addicted to porn and used to do things sexually to me that I didn’t consent to, we were in debt due to his drinking and I have never in the twenty odd years since it ended wondered what if.

Predictable and I'd have been bored senseless I think after a decade or two. Poor guy ended up having severe mental health issues in his 50's and now lives permanently in a MH facility.

My first boyfriend I had when I was 14 sadly died in a car accident when he was 22. I hadn't seen him for years, we only went out for a few months, but I was still sad to hear.

There are some funny stories here, but gosh, there are some sad ones too... I hope everyone who escaped a bad situation has gone on to thrive... 🤗

I would probably still be being regularly slapped about, controlled and isolated from friends and family.

Not me but DH - his first girlfriend is now a transman serving life for murder 😳 so God knows how his life would have turned out if he'd stayed with her/him!

Think we both had lucky escapes...

I am. 30yrs+ together 3 kids & now a granddaughter
Life is good

Great. I married him 45 years ago next week. Happy days!