What is the ballpark for a cash wedding gift for a couple these days?

[Allshallbewell2021]

Just wondering the range of what people give these days.

Thanks, it's for a relative.

A surprising number of people give nothing so I wouldn't sweat over it.

For close family £500-1000 depending on much I like them. Everyone else £250 for a couple. You need to at least cover your plate.

The meal they provide you with will cost £50 each so if you are invited as a couple I'd give £150. If it's close family like a niece then £250. If you are invited as a family of say 4 I'd gift £50 per person plus an extra £50. Otherwise it's costing them to host you. When my niece got married it was £75 per head so we gifted £250 as a couple.

Please don't worry and give whatever you can afford .

Everybody has different financial circumstances - both their own and also norms within their family/friends circle .

Consider the Christmas threads where some posters spend £150 on their siblings and others have a £10 secret Santa . Different families, different circumstances .

Can I ask on here whether people usually get a thank you for gifts for a wedding?

My friend's son got married and I gave them £75. I couldn't go to the wedding. Never heard a word from them.

My other friend's daughter got married. I went to the wedding on my own and contributed £100 to the honeymoon fund and chose a £20 bottle of wine to be sent to their home. Not a word.

But it is the couple's choice on how much they are spending to 'host'. People should not have to put themselves out of pocket or feel they cannot afford to attend the celebration of a friend's wedding .

For a full-day wedding, we'd give £50 each as a couple, so £100 total. As evening guests we'd probably give £40 or a nice bottle of something.

By that logic, if a low income couple have a modest wedding party in the local pub, you'd give them less than a wealthy couple having fancy wedding package in a country house hotel at ten times the cost.

There's no sense in using other people's choices or budgets as a guide to how much you give as a gift. Why on earth would you do that? They're choosing to have a party, of course they should expect it to cost them to host people

But at least no-one's said they'd give a 'nice' photo frame to make a point about how tacky they think giving cash as a gift is.

We gave £250 to DCous. They had booked us into the wedding venue accommodation overnight, which we would have paid for ourselves, except that it was part of their package, so we were partly giving back for that.

Bjorkdidit
I'm asking to get a sense of the ball park, the range of gifts with all the variables included.
These replies have been very useful.
Obviously I will then make my own decision.
The couple have asked for cash from those who are happy to do so.
It is a low key, low cost wedding but I very fond/close to the couple.
Hearing how other people make their gift decisions is very helpful - I don't go to many weddings these days so this is a useful way to get a sense of a sort of average. That's all.

I'd say about £50.

Otherwise it's costing them to host you.

Why wouldn’t it cost them? It’s their wedding. We celebrate our silver wedding next year, of course it’s going to cost us to host a celebration. What a bizarre way to view it.

Exactly, it's their choice to have a wedding and of course there will be a cost.

£50.

I also always obey 'don't give any presents' instructions.

Anyone who can't find something nice to do with £50 can give it to charity.

I might think differently if I went to the wedding of someone who actually earned less than me (as a couple) but so far I don't think that has ever happened.

I bought an engagement and then wedding present for my best friends daughter last year. I got a lovely personal hand written thank you.

We do £200 as a blanket gift, doesn’t matter if it’s just dh and j that are invited or all 5 of us, if it’s local or we’ve had to travel and stay over, whether it’s daytime and all day or just evening.

£100 for whole day, £50 for evening do. If it's close friends or family then we'd do £200.

£100-£150 per couple, depending on how close you are. If you're just invited to the wedding party (i.e. not the ceremony and meal), then £50 per couple.

We give £100 if both invited for full day and £50 if both invited to evening - amount is halved if just one of us.

We got married just as the cost of living crisis kicked in and found most people in good financial positions gave similar whereas those who were struggling with increased costs gave anything from a card to £30 (we had said no gifts were needed as we wanted people to attend without worrying about costs). I don’t think there is a set rule really, what is reasonable from your own budget.

I have found it really varies. We sent out cards to thank everyone for coming and included a special message for each person rather than specifically tying it to their gift and I’ve seen lots of other people do similar but other people you hear nothing after the wedding.

We have a wedding of the daughter of a close friend coming up. I will be going along with my DH, DD and her BF. I was thinking about £250 was appropriate so am interested in others responses.

£100pp is what I give

Otherwise it's costing them to host you

Of course it is, it's their own wedding!! If couples can't afford to host, scale it right back!

The concept of "paying for your plate" is common overseas though. I was already married (Tony wedding in a third country) and had a wedding party in DH's country. We got lots of cash gifts which paid for the party. Different culture.

Tiny not Tony!