What one-pot buffet dish can I make for extremely fussy guests

[unconditional83]

Got family coming over and there are 8 of them. They are all very conservative / unhealthy in what they usually eat, and so I've no idea what to make. It will need to be buffet style / lap food due to lack of space.

Was thinking of making one pot of something hot with salads. But every time I think of something I feel like they won't like it. We eat very healthy and fresh food often spicy and lots of plants. They usually eat really bland and UHP stuff, basically the very worst of "British" food and the reason NHS is on its knees but don't get me started freezer food, virtually no veg, and for special occasions Christmas they have things like Iceland "party food", crisps, pork pies etc.

What can I make that's healthy and tasty which they don't turn their nose up. I don't want to buy the crappy UHP they would choose as I don't ever eat that stuff and nor do my DC, but at the same time I want to make something everyone enjoys.

So braise or slow roast some brisket? The principle remains the same.

What's UHP? Do you mean UPF?

I think there are a lot of posts on this thread that are less serious than they appear on the surface.

I still maintain that serving anything other than lamb for an Easter lunch would be disappointing. I'd eat a spiced one pot, and wonder why I'd been invited to lunch with someone too lazy to host properly. Have them over for (instant) coffee and (ultraprocessed) Easter eggs, instead.

I can’t fathom how you think you can devise a one ot meal that you’ll all enjoy given the growing list of things you say they won’t eat 🤷🏻‍♀️

Make pizzas, bake potatoes and use the flesh for a salad and crisp up the skins, make coleslaw with yoghurt but buy them their own pot and do a bowl of salad.

You can have roasted veg on your pizzas and a bowl of options for them.

You got me. Warburton's is the scourge of loaves.

...anything other than lamb for an Easter lunch would be disappointing. I'd eat a spiced one pot, and wonder why I'd been invited...
Likewise. Why does it need to be lap food - if you haven't the space why invite so many?

What sort of food do they have round at theirs ? Surely most people would enjoy some chicken drumsticks ,french bread and coleslaw .Or a big old Shepherds pie?

You sound like Hyacinth Bucket hosting Onslow et al.

I think I would do a cold buffet. You could then have lots of variety to suit all tastes. Maybe make (as you won’t want to buy) some pizzas as well for the teenagers (and I’m sure some adults).

It's not for Easter lunch, it's for bank holiday Monday so wasn't factoring in roast lamb.

Aww, look at all these lovely posters who are actually trying to help you when all you actually wanted was a upf bun fight.

We didn't invite so many but they all added themselves on! Including girlfriends of two of the boys. We don't have the space to seat everyone unfortunately.

Just make pasties with the leftover lamb then.

That bank holiday would be “Easter Monday”. No?

I also think this

Surely I've made that clear enough? And been criticised for being snobby about it. Frozen ready meals, chicken nuggets type stuff, dominoes.

That doesn't make you a snob. Very clearly looking down on people does.

That bank holiday would be “Easter Monday”. No?

I just mean it's not the day one would expect a roast lamb dinner.

I feel like you're making this unnecessarily hard. Do a buffet that includes some beige freezer tapas for your guest and make some of the food that you like too. The upfs won't leap off the plates into your mouths or infect your healthy food.

Why not make home made chicken / fish goujons, home made wedges etc. Then add the salads etc you will eat.

You’re coming across as sneering though, it feels like you’ve started a thread to bitch about the visitors. I think that’s why you’re being challenged.

If it causes you this much angst, I probably wouldn’t invite them again, why not meet for a meal out or a picnic. Much less work for you.

I’d make sausage barms and chips. Genuinely. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t love a sausage sarnie and if you want good quality you can get them from a local butcher.

Or a chilli with nachos/rice/chips options.

Yeah I think you're right and I'll have to do that in the end. I was trying to avoid having loads of different plates and attempting to go for a one-pot / tray solution with simple sides, but I won't be able to please everybody if I do that.

OP hasn't said when these people are coming. It may not be Easter.

As an aside, it's really standing out who's read the OP's posts and who hasn't. Her guests, (who I assume are her family or her partner's, or why else are they coming) don't eat veg, fish or cheeseboard cheese, don't eat anything spicy, don't eat pork except in the form of bacon (what about sausages, sausage rolls, pork pie?), don't like berries, and (I'm guessing) much prefer everything to be coated in breadcrumbs or batter. Stews, soup, salad, paella, smoked salmon, strawberries and cream etc aren't going to cut it.

I wouldn't go to the effort of making pizza as your home-made pizza isn't going to be anything like what they eat by choice.

Go to Waitrose or M&S and buy some of their premium buffet stuff. Salad on the side for you and your family. Job done.

So just order everyone some pizza and wedges to share and cook whatever you want for yourself. It won't hurt you to spend some of your money on a takeaway.

Actually I don’t understand why you wouldn’t just get something in for your guests that the guests will enjoy. You don’t have to eat it!

I don’t drink (dairy) milk. I still manage to get some in when I have visitors who do, rather than expecting them to drink the plant-based stuff.

There are people who don't have lamb or chocolate for EVERY meal all Easter weekend? :s

I've had such a sheltered life. :)

(Though I think the person that suggested a "high tea" - or rather - sandwiches and cake, might have been on to something.)