Husband has never seen me totally naked?

[Lemonmiracle]

So it is exactly what it is. Been with DH 12 years and married half that time (we met very young) and I've always had body image issues. I was very slim when we met, 5'5 and 8.5 stone and am now 13.5 LOL (I just had a baby). But it's just hit me he has never ever seen me naked. I've always had a vest top on, or some lingerie that covers my belly or did the deed in the dark. He is AMAZING and showers me with love and compliments and affe tion daily, the spark is very much there. I just cannot bare to be naked infront of him (or anyone haha). I've never changed clothes infront of my sisters, mum, best friend etc. Anyone else relate or am I the only weirdo

@AlohaOptima my husband is honestly the male fitness standard haha. He looks GREAT, he plays football semi pro for our town and is in extremely good shape. Even if he wasn't I could never see him as anything other than the most handsome man I ever met but he actually is 😂
I will most definitely consider some form of therapy because this has been an issue for me before I could remember. Like I said I've never changed infront of anyone. At school for p.e I'd go change in a toilet cubicle and never infront of my friends/the other girls

Lemon thanks. They did say the face is hormonal. But thinking that money could be spent elsewhere. Laser not cheap..

Sorry to be pernickety OP - I wouldn't normally - but the contradiction make me laugh..... you can't bear to be naked, not can't bare to be naked!

@TammytheFaceGhost thank you! I will most definitely try the lighting lamp. Gentle lighting will make me feel less out there

I've never been completely naked with any of my exs. It's just the way it is. I'm utterly appalled by the sight of my body and extremely uncomfortable naked. They didn't seem to mind. It didn't stop anything from happening, or intimacy.

Haha agree 😂 although with my now long term partner he hates showering with me as I like the water a LOT hotter than him, so we tried it once early on, he said he felt like he was scalded, and never wanted to try it again. I hate cold/lukewarm water!

I do find it odd OP that your partner never sees you completely naked. We sleep naked and are very regularly around each other naked, see each other in the shower often (even if not showering together!). However, if it’s something that is normal to you and your relationship, then it’s perfectly fine and doesn’t make you a weirdo, we’re all different and have varying norms.

I can't advise on the issue itself but the comment about our friend feeling bad for your husband drew my attention. I don't think you should discuss anything so personal with this friend again.

@NosyNorahsNeighbour she's known us since we were all kids and brought it up . She mentioned she can't believe we met so young and are still together, but knows I'm shy as I would never change infront of her as teens etc. Then it went towards the topic of if I let my husband see me undress etc. I did find it weird tbh

I could be completely wrong but from the little you have said it sounds as though your friend either wants you to feel bad, or she wants your husband to feel he is missing out on something. Neither of these outcomes are things a true friend would want to bring about.

@NosyNorahsNeighbour i agree with you there about the friend!

OP, may l ask you how attitudes were about bodies at home when growing up?

l came from a household where parents were relaxed about nudity. Growing up we were taught there was nothing wrong or rude about bodies, but beware of bad people. When sister and l were in our teens (l’m 40s now) mum used to go topless at the beach; l was brought up in France. Friends would regularly change in front of each other. Have you never encountered a communal changing room?

l would have thought not being seen must carry with it some intimacy challenges, sometimes you really do need to see.

l think the best approach is not therapy, treat it like the best way to get into a cold swimming pool. Don’t ease your way down the steps, just dive or jump.

ln other words take a big deep breath and drop that dressing gown!

@StarlightLady I grew up in a home the complete opposite to you!!! Nudity was not welcome and I always saw my mum get dressed as quick as possible after a shower etc

OP, l suspected this might have been the case. Home was relaxed about nudity, to be quite candid, in the mornings when getting ready for the day, tits and bums used to hang out all over the place. Don’t run away with the image of a trendy liberal family though. In school days, if you didn’t do your homework there was trouble.

That said, my mum (now deceased) was the person my teenage friends would turn to, when they had issues that they would/could not discuss with their own parents.

l still think the best way forward is to take a deep breath and drop the lot. Try not to get hung up about body image. Last summer l saw someone on the beach topless and she had a mastectomy! I take my my hat off to her!

The strangest thing about this thread is that your mate is sitting around lamenting that your OH hasn't seen a naked woman. That is extremely weird. I can't imagine even getting close to that train of thought about any of my friends' partners.

Surprise him in the shower one day (on his birthday maybe)?
Even better, start with a shower with him in a (wet) tee shirt, I reckon he will be delighted to pull it off 😉

This is interesting, I only read an article yesterday that Patsy Kensit has issues about being seen naked, and over the years she’s looked lovely.

I think even if plastic surgery was involved it probably wouldn’t solve the feelings, it’s deep rooted, psychological. I’m the same, after my daughters birth I got super fit. My husband was amazed at what I’d achieved, but I still didn’t like to see myself naked. Why I feel like this I don’t know, and I’m 57 now, still not bad for my age, but still have the same hang ups 🤷‍♀️

I’m not sure we can assume the husband has never seen a woman naked either. Lot of men have seen me naked that l haven’t gone on to have sex with.

@StarlightLady we're 28 and have been together since we were young teenagers. Eachothers first partner etc. We have spent almost all our time together since aside from work/hobbies like football/tennis. I'm not sure when he would have seen another butt naked woman! Lol

@YogaLite 🙌 a lot of ppl on this thread or underestimating shower fun/sex…I’m all for it 😂

My husband told me that a pregnant woman was the ugliest sight on earth.
How I wish I’d left him then….

It isn't about @Lemonmiracle not trusting her husband. Why did you post? I can't see anything in your post that would help or support @Lemonmiracle.

I grew with you @NosyNorahsNeighbour

@Cointreacoffee you deserve so much better than a manchild !!!!

@BirthdayRainbow thank you. Found that post very irrelevant lol where does me having my bellybutton out for him link with trust