Do I pull DC from school party to attend family members now booked on same day

[HereWeGoAroundAgain]

Just curious as not been in this position before. One of my DC has been invited to their first school party and is super excited. It's now been announced a toddler cousin is having a party the same day. What's the right thing to do..

but surely your partner was able to tell you this? or were you both so unsure?

Prioritise school party it's a good way to build friendships and meet other parent plus you have already committed so it's only fair.

Dd had a friend whose dm prioritised family events over school friendships.
Her dd never had such solid friends as the others because she had little shared experiences .
In years to come your dd may rarely see her cousins but she needs friends.

Good lord. I hope you told them they were being ridiculous.

@WaitingForMojo

Cousin relationships are lifelong, school friendships are transient and there’s a school party every weekend at that age.

School friendships are hugely important, it's very odd to minimise the positives they can bring to a child's life just because they may not last forever.

Children learn so much from friendship dynamics and enjoying celebrations together such as birthdays are really special moments for little friends as well as cousins.

Cousins relationships may be lifelong but they aren't always stronger than all friendships, as you seem to think they are.

It's very odd to suggest school friendships aren't important just because they might not be forever friendships.

I have seen this happen to for the same reasons.

That awkward adult sounds like they might be the one to ditch the first invite for one that sounds better when toddler gets to school age (and, in this case, sounds like the OPs DC has identified their favourite anyway (luckily, the 1st!)

That’s a bit weird. Most children get very excited about parties with their friends.

Go to the school party!! It’s not nice to drop out of someone’s party at short notice and you have to know this school mum for years to come.

It’s a much more plausible excuse to say ‘so sorry, but we have already accepted a party invite for that day!’

It can be very upsetting for the birthday child if several children don’t turn up. I’ve heard some awful stories of parties where no one, or hardly anyone came.

In one story on here, the birthday child was delighted to get excellent weather for the day of his party, only to find that most of his guests didn’t turn up as their parents had decided to take them on family trips to the beach instead 😢. I bet each parent justified this to themselves by thinking, “it won’t hurt to have one child missing”.

@WaitingForMojo

Not one of my four children had ever been remotely fussed by school parties.

I don’t know your 4 children but they either had a rather isolated experience throughout their entire school years, not forming any close friendships OR you’ve forgotten because all your children have left school OR you’re bull shitting 🤷‍♀️

Next time maybe they should check everyone can make the date.... I've already started telling my DD's friends' parents to save the date for her party in July!

It's unreasonable to expect you to let others down just because they were not as organised as they should have been.

Stick to your guns, your little one shouldn't miss out on something she's exited about because someone else is making a fuss.

I would do school party as youve RSVPd and he's excited, although I would feel awkward as I know a lot of people think family comes first.

I wouldn't have thought a toddler would be that bothered about their cousin...more their grandparents at that age. At a bit older though, my DS would be gutted to not have his cousin there...but then I would prioritise his availability and would have checked the date first.

If I was in your situation though, whoever is the relative on the sibling's side would still be going with the other children. I would never use one child's party as an excuse for everyone not to go and I think that would be unreasonable.

I've already started telling my DD's friends' parents to save the date for her party in July!

seriously?

how old is your daughter?

@SpongeBob2022