Anyone know any quintessentially middle class families? Are their lives really that perfect?

[Bridgetjoneski]

We have two who got the bill in the dc's school. The fathers have big jobs in the city, one of the mums is a sahm the other works very part time.
Always busy doing something impressive with their kids, hiking, sea swimming, skiing at half term etc..
Their dc are very bright & they seemed to have chosen their extracurriculars wisely with a view towards the red bricks & one child wants to apply to an American ivy for a scholarship in her chosen sport (rowing)
They just seem so clued in & have know how or inside knowledge! Beautiful, huge, spotless houses too. Hosted coffee mornings for the PTA.
Would love a life like that! DH says it's simply down to money but it's more imo.. Their kids are also much more confident & eloquent than mine!

I like striples 'plan'

Imagine if you're some disaffected kid from a rough sinkhole estate?

Even if you work your friggin ass off, you've no chance

I think its sad we still herd people into social classes

I agree. I live in a country which isn't obsessed with what class people belong in, and the families OP is writing about just sound like a normal family to me, with a bit more money than some others. I've literally never heard anyone here refer to someone else's class. Isn't it time this was moved on from in the UK?

It would be nice, but working class people don't have the luxury of forgetting what class they are.

But what does that even mean? I grew up when working class meant manual labour. My dad worked in an office and we considered ourselves to be middle class. We didn't have much money. My cousins were working class. Their dad was a builder. They had more money than us though! Class doesn't really correlate with wealth (although obviously related). Lots of people who now describe themselves as working class would previously have been middle class.

I have a luxury of not falling into any of the class characteristics due to being a foreigner although ticking all of the boxes mentioned by OP. And I find it impossible to socialise with parents from our private school. They are so class conscious that right from the start they cut me from their cosy little circle.

Ha ha yes but I could be talking absolute shite! You'll never know.

Tell me more about the evil overlord teens

I agree. I live in a country which isn't obsessed with what class people belong in, and the families OP is writing about just sound like a normal family to me, with a bit more money than some others. I've literally never heard anyone here refer to someone else's class. Isn't it time this was moved on from in the UK?

How can people move on when class is so prevalent? Much of the land is still owned by the monarchy & aristocracy given to them yrs ago by William the Conqueror. Politics, media, business jobs are still much more likely to go those privately educated. For young people today their chances of becoming a home owner can depend more on whether their parents did. I don’t see what purpose it serves to pretend it isn’t a thing.

I'd say we're middle class. Mortgage free, two holidays a year - one educational one leisure - kids have several hobbies, wife is sahm whilst I'm on 140k. But - state schooled. My dad went to a private school and taught me a lot. The difference is education on softer skills not taught in state schools. I educate my kids on various topics not taught at school - they make the difference across your life:

The drive and want to succeed. Just find a way, research, trial and error, ask for help etc.

Attitude over grades. Be competitive. Not with your peers, but yourself - if you got 7/10 last time , analyse why , look at weaknesses that you can improve, then try and beat your last score. Don't give a shit what others are doing and don't buy into the school "everyone wins" mantra because it's not true. At work , valued assets that get promoted are the ones that deliver. Attitude.

Economics- how to save, how to prioritise spending. How to invest, why you should start snd prioritise your pension, etc etc

Hobbies and staying off social media. The latter is a waste of time and mental health minefield. Our kids have hockey, swimming and theatre clubs, the more active they are the less they bother with tech and stay mentally healthy. Those hobbies also promote social skills, competitive attitude and fitness.

Pay yourself first. Work before play. Muscles are made in the kitchen etc etc.

Class doesn't correlate with wealth, I agree. But working class people tend to have fewer opportunities growing up and that mindset never really goes away. In general they have to work a lot harder/longer than middle classes to achieve wealth. Not always true of course, but often.

I thought I did. House worth over a million, SAHM, expensive cars and holidays, loving supportive family, all very physically attractive and popular locally.
Except suddenly she's diagnosed with cancer, and a surprising divorce reveals he's been controlling and abusive for years, is now estranged from the older teen DC and they've all actually been in counselling for some time.

I am v suspicious of people with spotless houses.
It is quite often a mask.
Please don’t buy into all you see on social media etc.
things are never as they seem…

Class doesn't correlate with wealth

I think it does for the most part.

To me working class means manual work or unskilled office roles. Basically anything you can do without qualifications, just some training.

Middle class is your nurses and estate agents (at the lower end), lawyers/doctors/accountants in the middle, and hospital consultants/hedge fund types/CEOs of medium to large companies at the top.

Upper class is titled landowners, minor royals, ancient wealthy families in large country houses and so on.

And it’s not hard and fast, a large inheritance etc can push you about a bit from one category to another. The only one you can’t move into is upper class as it’s dependent on background, upbringing and ancestry.

Most of them have that 'dirty little secret' and are hiding behind the facade of being a happy, wealthy, loving family.
I know a few and they all have some sort of issue.
Affairs or being desperately unhappy in their marriage seem to be the elephant in the room for most of these families.

The only class I get is the people who just get on with it and don't have chips on their shoulders and dont spend time worrying about other classes, that is real class no matter what label you stick before it

The most sensible post on here .

Yes ! So much bloody chippiness on here. And in real life ! Sick of it.

Weird people you know. Most MC people I know are like anyone else I know. Just normal people but without the financial stress.

People love to want to believe people with money are somehow secretly struggling with something awful

You can marry into the UC. After a few years and popping out some dc you are considered part of the UC.

No one is going to suggest Kate or Sophie are still MC

I find this thread a bit depressing. Surely here is more to aspire to in life then being a management consultant with a big house.

Not in the UK it doesn't. Wealthy builders who have built up an empire or the women who started Stagecoach and BetFred (or is it the other betting company ) etc are phenomenally rich but they are firmly WC

The current incumbents of crumbling manors with no money to fix the plumbing are still UC

Middle class spans teachers to investment bankers who earn hundreds of times more

Not in the UK it doesn't. Wealthy builders who have built up an empire or the women who started Stagecoach and BetFred (or is it the other betting company ) etc are phenomenally rich but they are firmly WC

I don’t understand your point? Of course some of the wealthiest people came from nothing & are WC but is that the majority?

@IloveAslan I live in a country which isn't obsessed with what class people belong in, and the families OP is writing about just sound like a normal family to me, with a bit more money than some others. I've literally never heard anyone here refer to someone else's class. Isn't it time this was moved on from in the UK?

Ironically it is often WC and lower MC who perpetuate the class divide. They bang on about 'new money' in scathing terms and love to suggest that 'old money' is somehow more worthy and with more class.

It's such a strange assertion that someone who did nothing to obtain their wealth is somehow seen as being of a higher standard than people who gained wealth through intelligence, hard work, entrepreneurial skill etc.

it's because the snarling masses hate to see one of their own doing better than them. They can accept the aristocracy as they know they could never be in that social group but if people with the same opportunities as themselves do phenomenally well it marks them out as having failed. Not succeed the way the rich MC did. So they feebly mutter 'new money' under their breath to try to make themselves seem better. Its very very embarrassing