Traditions we have lost?

[Lydara22]

Brought on by family circumstance currently, I remembered that when I was a child, my mother always closed all of the curtains in the house as a respectful sign of mourning.
We don't do that anymore do we?

What other respectful traditions have we lost?

Pen pals. And people wearing hats. When I look at old photos from the 1950s/60s,I'm always struck by how many people are wearing hats. Seems to be pretty rare these days.

There are two yarn shops in the town I live.

It's called yarn because it's not made from wool anymore - mostly acryllic. Very difficult to buy 100% wool yarn without going online.

Wait, is that why the name of the pram company is Silver Cross?! I never knew that!

Whitsuntide. I’ve photos of me, my mum and sister all in our new Whitsun outfits (spoilt by 1 yr old me leaning over and biting mum on her arm), the whitsunday services and processions through the parks in Sheffield with bands and banners. Even when we moved in 95 to the north east I remember there being whitsun processions.

Sorry Tootytoot, missed your post.
I grew up in Australia, and on sundays we went for a Drive. Usually to see my parents best friends, no phones, so just popped in unannounced, if they weren’t in, oh well, we’ll go and see Auntie x and uncle y on the way back. Or they would do the same. How they co ordinated I do not know.
Calling friends of family Auntie and Uncle (once they weren’t mr and Mrs)

I’m from Sheffield. I don’t remember any of this. I’m 60. How old are you?

This is called hanselling in Scotland, I think. I would not give a gift if an empty purse or bag, although I don’t feel the need to find actual cash, I’d put anything at all in there. Cash good though if there’s nothing to hand that recipient might enjoy receiving.

I still do this though…I’m not sure it’s died out completely

We have a sunday roast every week (we're late 50's) and my parents come every Sunday and we play cards afterwards. Luckily my DH does all the shopping, cooking and clearing up!

Still plenty of milkmen around; mine delivers 3 times a week. Strange how the sound of clanking bottles in the middle of the night is so soothing.

I used to do this, but now worry in case the deceased/family are not Christian and it could be offensive. It’s a tricky one

Also, when we called for our friends at their houses, we'd ring the doorbell then step off the doorstep and wait for them to answer. I was taught it was rude to be standing on the doorstep when they answered the door. Not sure if that's a thing anymore these days.

Oh, I always do it! Automatically, really. I don’t think I’ve ever been told to do it, it just feels more respectful to me.

Honorary aunties and uncles - friends of your parents and grandparents who were not directly related, so were given the Auntie/Uncle title as a way of showing respect (so you didn't call them by just their first name).

I another person who dislikes visible underwear. I know that I'm old-fashioned in thta respect.

I'm from NE England and I'm 52. I don't remember this at all either. I'm pretty clued up on all the other traditions that have been mentioned, but drawing a blank on this.

We still close curtains for respect of the dead.

When we were following the hearse for my grandad’s funeral a guy overtook us all in his bright red, very noisy sports car, he just couldn’t wait the few minutes it took us to travel down the road. That’s was 20 years ago but I still can’t get over how disrespectful that was.

My dh works outside and says he still takes his hat off when a funeral procession passes him. Hardly anyone does that now.

Getting new clothes at Whitsuntide and wearing them for a family outing on Whit Sunday.
I remember our whole extended family going to the local park for a picnic. We’d go on the boats, play in the playground, play cricket and there was usually a funfair.

Also getting a whip and top at a particular time of the year. Can’t remember if it was Easter or pancake day.

Dressing smart, everyone dresses grey tracks bottoms where I live these days.

I love watching archive clips of every day people going about their days in towns and cities on YouTube/Tik Tok and even amongst everyday working class folk, they were always dressed smart, may not be new or the best quality clothing but still smart. People have lost the art of dressing nicely unless it’s for a special occasion.

When DS was a baby we were on the bus and a very old man leaned over and put a pound in his buggy. He said 'there's a penny for the bairn'. I immediately said oh no that's so kind but we don't need it, but the man just nodded and got off the bus. I was honestly moved to tears.

I told my mum about it and she said that old man will remember only too well when another mouth to feed was a real hardship. I still well up at the thought of it. His generation will all be gone soon and we will lose something we can't replace. DS is growing up in another world entirely.

Mil died in 2019, people stopped and took hats off.

Dm died in 2006. Everyone did the same then.

Most people don’t wear hats most of the time now so things like taking it off for a funeral procession will die away. You do see people pausing and bowing their heads slightly still though.

I’ve never been taught to step back off a doorstep, its just what people do so they are not right in the face of the person opening it, I have not noticed a decline in people doing it. Most doorsteps are too small to stand on anyway.

I’m in my 50s, we were never allowed to call anyone aunty or uncle unless they actually were. I think we were a bit ahead of our time TBH in that I have always called my parents friends by their first name and their DCs used my parents first names. My DCs friends have always used my first name, I’d have hated it if they had felt they had to say Ms Surname, I’m glad things have changed in this respect.

Maypole (I was a dancer in the 90s)
Morris dancing
Putting horse shoes the right way up
I called my parents best friends auntie/uncle
No new shoes on the table (still do this)

@aliceinanwonderland maybe I’m oblivious, but I can’t imagine anyone taking offence at saying a prayer for a deceased person… it’s just an extended version of “rest in peace”. I also pray for the person in an ambulance if it goes past.

My neighbours were also aunty and uncle. DH’s neighbours were Mr and Mrs but he grew up in a posher neighbourhood.

We were made to call everyone aunt and uncle or brother and sister (in our language) as a sign of respect for their age and wisdom.