I hate myself and my size. Shock of my life. I'm a lard arse.

[BigKnickersSize18]

I got weighed last night. I'm 14stones 11pounds and 5feet 1 and a half. I should be just below 9stones. I'm embarrassed and ashamed of myself. I've had my head in the sand over this for a long time.

I have aches and pains and get breathless going uphill and flights of stairs. I look like a teletubby.

I'm doing the giving up for lent thing seriously this year. No sweets cakes fizzy drinks or rubbish for 40 days then I'll address it seriously.

I'm terrified it's going to be so tough.

Why not focus on "adding in" to your diet rather than taking things away and depriving yourself. It's much kinder and sustainable in the long term.

Add in extra veg, a bowl of salad, lean protein of choice, some nuts and seeds, berries, Greek yogurt, whatever movement or exercise you can and 2 litres of water. Then eat what you want of your regular food. Chances are with the increase of protein and fibre you'll have fewer sugar cravings and your energy will be more stable. Over time, hopefully your well-being will improve and you'll be able to make nourishing choices more regularly.

Good luck - I know how hard it is

Why wait until lent?

Op, I felt exactly the same as you after summer. Totally embarrassed by photos of myself and so down about myself. I've done WW and slimming world so many times in the past, I didn't want to pay for that again as I'm trying to watch what I spend. I downloaded the nhs weight loss app, didn't tell anyone apart from dh and then just did it. It was tough (and still is sometimes) but it really makes you accountable. I've lost 2st since September (I put at least half a stone back on, maybe more, over Christmas, but have since lost it again). You log your food so you know exactly how many calories you're having. I've now started using my fitness pal as I've started running and it logs your fitness on there too. I feel so much better for it. Give yourself small, manageable challenges, like half a stone at a time and it won't feel so overwhelming. You can do it op!

Also, don't deprive yourself of things, that'll just make you resentful. Make the right choices with your food and allow yourself the things you like, just switch them up. I have Pepsi max, I've changed crisps for quavers or Pom bears and I have skinny whip bars. I still have what I want but in moderation. Once you start to count your calories then it'll become second nature to you and instinctively know what you should and shouldn't have

You definitely don't need weight loss surgery if you're only 14st 11lbs OP.
I started at 17st 4lbs (same height as you) and I'm now 14st 1lb. I've been keeping an eye on calories, upping my exercise slightly but nothing crazy, cut out alcohol, dairy, pizza and pasta. That's it. It has actually been way easier than I expected and I'm feeling so much healthier already. I don't get out of puff on stairs etc like you describe and I am well on target to reach 9ish stone by the end of the year. I've worked hard to educate myself on nutrition and maintaining the healthy lifestyle so I don't pile it back on. Slow and steady OP, you will get there before you know it. Good luck and don't be so harsh on yourself.

You do not sound like a wanker. I'm losing weight following a major health scare too and agree it focuses you like nothing else.

Why would that be the first suggestion?

Firstly, it doesn't always work long term, I know two people who've had it and put the weight back on.

Secondly, why undergo surgery and the associated risks before even trying to change your lifestyle?

As you can see from the responses on the thread there are many different ways you can tackle this. I think the first thing you need to do though is to have a good think about how and why you got overweight. Because it can be different for us all.

Did you gain weight recently or has it been a gradual increase over a few years?

Do you boredom eat? Emotional eat? Do you eat a lot of sugar? What are your portions like? Do you snack? Do you eat a lot of processed foods?

Figure all of that out first. Then try to work out what approach will work for you.

I wouldn’t try anything like meal replacements or dropping calories too low. You want something you can stick with long term. Because it has to be a lifestyle change.

My Fitness Pal is great for tracking calories. Try tracking your intake without any changes now to see what it looks like. Then maybe make some easy small gradual swaps.

Don’t try to do too much too quickly.

Give yourself a month of a new healthy eating plan and see how it goes.

I really would caution against a 'big bang' approach either with diet or exercise. You want slow, gradual changes so that it feels doable and not like you are punishing yourself. By making lots of changes at once you risk making yourself miserable and it'll take ironclad willpower not to crack. Once you crack you will binge and the self hatred cycle will begin anew.

You’ve got this OP.

I am five feet one and went from 13 stone 11 pounds to 11 stone between July and November last year. I drastically reduced my carb intake and ditched my daily can of diet soda. Honestly it wasn’t difficult once the first couple of weeks were out of the way.
I didn’t increase my exercise until about a month ago.
Good luck and update us.

@bahhamburgers you definitely do not sound like a wanker, you sound like you should be writing a book about what you’ve faced up to and how you achieved that level of weight loss. Amazing. 👏

You'll hit a wall at some point and be ready and inspired to lose the weight.

I've been overweight since my teens, but reached a point last October when I'd topped the scales at my fattest and I'd had enough. I was 100% committed and ready to lose the weight. My plan was to have a glow up (I hate that term but you know what i mean) when the clocks changed from October last year to this March. I joined a WL clinic and seriously revamped my diet, increased my steps, reduced alcohol intake and started weight training. 3 months in and I'm 22lbs down, dropped a couple dress sizes and feel stronger than ever. I'm looking forward to how 2024 is looking for me. I have instagram accounts that I follow for inspiration.

I don’t think you should wait until lent, nor do I think you should cut out entire foods. You should be changing your lifestyle so it should be maintainable otherwise you’ll just pile it back on. Personally I could never do without chocolate/crisps. They’re my greatest pleasure in life 😅

If I were you I’d keep a diary of my food intake, work out the calories and then deduct 500 cals a day and that should be your new daily calorie intake. I would also try and aim for 8-10k steps per day. For weight loss, it’s all about calories. Obviously if you want to be healthy, not just skinny, you’ll need to make better choices about what you eat and not just how much. I’d still keep some treats in there though but that’s just me

Dear lord, is this really necessary? OP already feels like shit.

OP I agree with the posters suggesting moving more, lower carb, adding in more healthy foods. Slow and steady wins the race here.

Ignore the suggestion of weight loss surgery!

Similar weight and height when I started my weight loss journey doing Weight Watchers and now I have overall won the battle with my weight. I still have bad days etc but I know I can get back to it. I wish I had started sooner in all honesty. It’s worth considering and you can do it entirely at home using your own bathroom scales and the app so no need to go to any classes etc.

I’ve lost 4 stone since June with just sticking to a calorie deficit. Sometimes I go long walks, not all the time though.

I have lost 65lb since April doing fasting and low carb (look at Mindy Pelz and Jason Fung). It's totally doable. No need to jump onto the medication/surgery train.

I agree. I've lost over 3.5 stones last year ,never been hungry and eat bread and potatoes. I feel much better for it.

I've found getting at least 8-10 portions of fruit , veg and salad every day works really well for me. They are very filling so I don't have room for junk. I stick to 2 meals a day. If I'm hungry I snack on protein rich things like a hard boiled egg or homemade hummus or Greek yoghurt.

The weight dropped off me. I'm a similar height to you and I lost nearly 3 stone over about 6 months. So far it's stayed off for over 2 years.

Very low carb is the thing that works for me. I have to keep at it. Otherwise the pounds pile on again.

It’s so fucked up that people would rather inject themselves with poison or remove part of their stomach than … eat less. And yes this is coming from someone who is in the same position. 3 stone down from calorie deficit. Would like to lose another 2 stone I think.. and I’ll get there. And have a damn better chance of keeping it off afterwards!

With all due respect, I'm not sure it's your business to decided what OP calls herself.

I’m about the same as you. I am very down but trying hard to be kind to myself.
I had a breakdown recently and have been referred to my local gym for my well-being. I’m doing Pilates which is agony and I spend time in the pool. I’m on a wellness programme and lost 3 lb last week. Drop in ocean but it’s just a start. Ask the gp of any similar referrals in your area. And write a journal of all the lovely things you do every day and how much you are special. It’s just the start that’s difficult but once there you will achieve. Xx good luck

I could have written your original post, except I am taller and weigh more. I have known for ages, years that I need to change and lose weight but I just like sugar and food so much. I get a real dopamine hit from unhealthy food.

So this week on Tuesday for some reason I just started. I downloaded the NHS lose weight app which is a calorie tracker, I am liking it. I also downloaded the NHS brisk 10 which says you need to walk briskly for at least ten mins a day. I also downloaded a coach to 5k but I haven't managed to open that or start anything yet!

I have taken a lot of strength from the comments from other posters. I hope to be able to continue, I tend to lose heart quite quickly and sticking with it will be my main challenge!

Thank you for all the inspirational comments.