Do you view registry office weddings as equal?

[Inyourwildestdreams]

Just wondering what people’s thoughts are on this tbh. If you’re invited to a registry office wedding (reg office then a meal out fully paid for) do you view it as equal to being invited to a “big” wedding in a church/wedding venue etc?

Do you put the same effort in to attending/outfits/a gift?

Just to note, registry office weddings can also be big!

Yes of course it's equal and I certainly put as much effort in!

I went to a wedding at Liverpool Town Hall a beautiful Grade I listed building in a fabulous location - a gorgeous venue that more than matches the splendour of any church.
Weddings - Liverpool Town Hall

The photo is not the wedding I attended!

Yes, 100%. Incidentally every registry office wedding I have ever been to is of a couple who are still together.

They're absolutely equal to me. Your wedding sounds lovely and you don't have to have a stately home and formal dinner to have a good wedding day. Most of my favourite weddings as a guest have been less formal ones.

I actually find it more annoying when people choose to have a fancy day, spend thousands and have the idea that their choice for Prince and Princess fairytale day obliges their friends and family to give bigger gifts / gift giving should depend on where the couple chose to have their wedding rather than people generously giving what they can.

Of course! Better than people having a sham church wedding when they’re not Christian, I’d think less of that.

And our wedding was still big, just went to town hall first then full meal, party etc at a hotel afterwards.

Yes equal to church or historic house in terms of whether real wedding or worth a nice outfit.

However there is a big variety in terms of how grand different registry offices are - perhaps that might sway people's opinion as to how formal they want to be outfit wise

This. Obviously it's equal.

This exactly

I think secular weddings are equal regardless of where they’re held. As a Christian I have a sacramental / transformational belief around Christian weddings (and unfortunately in England you can’t have legal religious weddings outside of a church). Legally they’re equal. But spiritually totally different.

I’ll be honest, I like a fuss; flowers/bridesmaids/speeches etc. I sort of home my dds will ant to do the frilly stuff when the time comes and I’ll enjoy hearing about the planning and seeing it come together. That does not mean I have any less respect for marriages in registry offices. I would be honoured to be invited as a guest, want to choose an appropriate outfit and give a gift.

I'd actually be really chuffed to be invited to a registry office wedding, as they are usually smaller and I'd assume the couple thought a lot of me to include me in their day. Also, a lot less hassle and faffing about, so it would seem more relaxed than a big grand event.

Yes!

Ugh people are annoying!! I'd agree it's the same thing, it's still your big day that you've spent time and effort on planning!

Unless stated on the invitation I would expect exactly the same thing, of course everyone's wedding day is different and is what they want so you can have the dress, bridesmaids, flowers, readings etc etc just because it's in a registry office it doesn't mean it has to be in and out! There's some amazing registry office buildings out there!

Some of your guests sound rude! Glad it's not bothering you.

I have never been to one so I might need some direction in what I should wear but I would be thinking regular wedding outfit unless I was told otherwise.

Absolutely

Yes, of course! I'd just assume the couple are not religious and true enough to themselves not to pretend to be so they could have a church wedding. I'd make equal effort to a church wedding.

I’ve never thought of this before, I had a medium sized registry office wedding as I’m not religious. This was before you could get married in hotels etc.
I like to think my 27 year marriage is as real as someone who got married in a church.

We married in a registry office 23 years ago and every one made a huge effort to look their best. Fabulous day and I definitely didn't feel it was inferior to a church service.

We had flowers, speeches, first dance, friend had bridesmaids (I chose not to)... The registry office had lovely flowers.

I am sometimes confused about what do people think weddings outside of church or stately home look like 🙈

Only maybe in terms of outfit - but only in the way that I would also vary outfit depending on any other relevant elements to any individual wedding -e.g. weather, how posh the venue is etc. I would still wear something nice and "weddingy" (and definitely a suit if I was a man as per your example) not jeans or anything. I might not go full hat and fancy dress but I also wouldn't do that if it was an outdoors/barn type/unfussy wedding either.

But yes in all other aspects would consider it to be exactly the same!

We had our wedding at a registry office and had some people query the dress code, which might have happened anyway. I would say there's more a range with a registry office wedding. We expected people to dress to the nines, had a photographer etc, whereas we've had friends who wanted a far more low key event and not to have people at the restaurant after realise that it was a wedding celebration.

Definitely equal. And I would breathe a sigh of relief at avoiding a sermon, prayers and hymns.

Of my friends and family about a quarter have had religious ceremonies, about a quarter register office and about half a civil ceremony in a "venue". The latter are my favourite as you can usually have the whole event in one place and not have to faff about with transport but they are all equal in terms of the marriage that comes out of them.

Registry weddings can be big or small, religious ceremonies can also be big or small. I had a friend who had a church wedding with just immediate family.

Honestly I would probably assume a very small wedding with just immediate family was more casual - not less important, I would still want to be there and would get a gift but I probably wouldn't dress as formally for example