One of the saddest stories in a long time TW: Neglect/child death

[Perjo]

I read this this morning and it has to be one of the saddest, most avoidable child deaths I've read about in a long time. Especially where it says he was still alive on January 2nd.

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/47b4c6b2-673d-4c43-8ef0-b8ba05c47f0a?shareToken=39b0f7f8b3c90882aca021214db91159

I imagine if I was a single parent this story would worry me as I have young children. I wonder if there is something that could alert family and friends in situations like this. I was thinking something like an app that contacts people if you haven’t been active on your phone in a day. Obviously would only work for people who regularly use it but that’s something many do.

The social worker went above and beyond IMO and she is in no way at fault whatsoever.

The mother/wider family are most definitely at fault. It is primarily the parents job to ensure their child is safe and well, but if this family were on SS radar it was known the parents were somewhat incapable. Because of this, agencies become culpable too, but in this instance, it is not SS who were at fault, but the police.

The police should have undertaken a welfare check and are at fault for not doing so.

Of course the child's mother is also mainly to blame, but if agencies are involved and the police KNOW the child is at risk, then they should have undertaken a welfare visit.

Tragic as it is I think the mother has some fucking nerve saying 'if social services had done their job he'd still be alive'. I'm hoping it's just her grief reacting because she needs to take a long, hard look at herself in the mirror.

It’s everyone politely giving the benefit of the doubt and buying into the mystery “circumstances” of these types of things that means that these parents then feel they can absolve themselves of responsibility and blame social services.

If some detailed account comes out about how the mother was absolutely powerless to do anything more than she did (nothing) then I’ll eat my hat and apologise, but more than likely she’s a POS who basically just didn’t care.

This.
Utterly heartbreaking. That poor child.
How dare the mother blame the social worker.
Yes there were official failings but surely you would check in with your toddler every day.
It was Christmas fgs.
Were there no neighbours who noticed ?

Nobody knows the full history of the reasons why this little boy was in his fathers care - all the reports state is that there was an argument before xmas and that was the last time she saw him - nobody knows what the contact arrangements or restrictions were. She may have had video calls with him at a pre arranged time over xmas, or this may not have been possible - but the full information is not there to blame this mother for not being in contact with the child.

All the people that are making out that he was incapable of caring for his own child because he was 60 years old are incredible - how many of these same people use grandparents age 60+ to care for their own children?

The Dad was in poor health but so are many other single parents with little to no support - I don't see posts stating that single mothers should not have care of their children, or the child's dad should be checking up on her all the time. Under normal circumstances this would be seen as controlling and invasive.

Sadly this Dad's health failed him and the poor child was left alone and passed in tragic circumstances, it cannot be the fault of anyone. The police should have carried out the welfare check on 2 Jan but there is no guarantee that this poor child would have still been alive then.

The social worker that found them must be going through hell, this is something that will stay with her for life, affect her career and decision making in the future and will impact on her mental health.

Tragic for all concerned - but not really predictable or preventable.

Yet again lessons aren't being learnt by SS and yet another poor child has to die.

I am so glad that most people on this post have a more realistic view of SS here - I feel for the Social Worker who may well never work again. The police lack of response when asked for welfare checks is increasingly problematic - as can be seen here. But again, with less funding, they dont have the resources to do everything they are asked to do. That poor little boy - this was such a preventable tragedy.

This thread makes very uncomfortable reading, we don't know anything about the mother. Maybe she was in hospital, maybe she couldn't get in touch. It's not fair to judge when we know nothing yet. People grieving always say irrational things, they shouldn't be quoted in the media, it's just disrespectful sensationalist BS to make a profit.

I can't believe people are saying people with health conditions should not be allowed mind children, should we be removing children from single mothers once they get a diagnosis??

I keep thinking of that poor man in the last moments of his life, probably panicking about his baby and praying someone came. Knowing he let the little fella down. Its absolutely tragic.

I think that would be a really good idea, I used to worry about the same when my DC was a baby and DH worked away.

Definitely think it’s unfair when schools and agencies or neighbours get the blame (although would of thought the police be round the day SW had highlighted a concern) Its really not uncommon for people not to be in at a prearranged time or not to turn up for appointments etc, never answer their phones, let alone have a working phone, change address or even go back to their home country without telling anyone.

Agree with this

We know enough about the mother, she’s gone to The Sun whining about how it’s social services fault that she didn’t bother her arse with her kid for over a week. Poor wee thing had no chance at a happy life

Age UK promote wristworn alarms for elderly people living alone. I wonder whether the same should be available to individuals with a serious diagnosis plus sole care of very young DC?

A desperately, desperately sad series of events here.

All the comments I saw on the DM article were along the lines of 'where was the mother or any other family? Don't blame SS', with which I agree.

The police are partly culpable, as is the family. The social worker is not, as far as I'm concerned.

The mother has a flipping nerve to blame SS for this when they were the only ones trying to do something. They can't just go round breaking doors down. Why were ss involved in the first place if she was such a good mother? He looks filthy in those photos from the article so clearly not well looked after to start with. Tragic.

This thread makes very uncomfortable reading, we don't know anything about the mother. Maybe she was in hospital, maybe she couldn't get in touch.

I think it's safe to say that if the mother had been so sick that she was unable to contact the man who was caring for her two-year-old (or ask someone else to contact him for her), she would have mentioned it when she spoke to the press. And if she tried to contact the father and couldn't, that's even worse - she should have gone round there personally to check he and her son were okay, not just shrugged and said "oh well".

If the roles were reversed, I doubt MN would be worrying about the fairness of judging the father.

I can't believe the mother had the nerve to judge social services. I honestly think some people believe social workers, nannies and teachers are supposed to parent their children for them.

Couldn't the police have told the SW they didn't have the manpower to do a welfare check? Then she could have taken more assertive action earlier.

Exactly this.

Did you search her on FB? That's a bit weird

Reading between the lines, this poor little boy was born into hopeless circumstances and it's a wonder his life wasn't cut short even sooner. Yet another example of the fact that if services weren't so stretch to the limits then more could have been done to protect him and many others like him who have no stability or safety net in their lives.

If the mum was not allowed contact with Bronson, or only allowed with social services involvement, I think we can safely assume that she had persistently demonstrated an inability to meet his needs.

Too physically or mentally ill to check on her child's welfare three weeks ago? But well enough now to chat cogently with the press? Give over.

Heartbreaking. I am sure in the next few weeks more of the tragic story will unfold but from what it reads the SW did everything she could. What about the mum. What mum leaves a two year old over Christmas without any contact. ! Such a sad sad story.

I work in Social work and these type of responses grind on my gears. Social workers get blamed time and time again for errors sometimes rightly sometimes wrongly but in our line of work, using the excuse of not having enough manpower would never be acceptable? Why is it acceptable for police to not do their job due to not having enough manpower? Why should Social workers be doing the job of the police?

I'm not sure what sort of decisive action you have in mind as it seems the poor Social worker did all she could? They had contacted friends and relatives it appears and got a key from a landlord. Social workers believe it or not, don't have legal powers to be breaking doors down of houses.

This is such a tragic story absolutely heartbreaking, but my anger is directed at the police and mother, not at Social work.

Poor lad. I don't see how social services or the mother are to blame here. I'm assuming the mum thought he was safe with his dad, mothers are allowed a break.

You can't break a door down assuming someone's dead just because they don't answer the door once or twice.

The SS did no wrong.

This.