Do you believe IVF is ok?

[Ididivfama]

I’ve been reading a lot of the surrogacy threads recently (and I know that is a different topic) but I was curious to mumsnet posters ideas of ethics and ivf. You can see from my name that we ended up doing it, but I won’t be horribly offended by different views. I’m more curious.

Obviously it’s ’unnatural’ as a process and there is the issue of what happens to any extra blastocysts (I use the term blastocyst as they are pre-embryo stage and calling them embryos makes people view it differently - at least I did!) Even so, would you count leaving blastocysts to decay as abortion? I never did but I’ve read that view now so I’m curious as to how many people view it like that.

As is pointed out on the surrogacy threads - no one is ‘entitled’ to have a child. Is that the same for us ivf parents?

In terms of IVF. If you can't have a child naturally then in my opinion that is natures way of saying there is something about your genetic make up that it doesn't want passed to the next generation.

What if you can have one child but not another naturally... please can you translate what Nature is saying there?

What if both parties had children with other partners but not together?

I'm with @Flopsythebunny

This is a fucking stupid thread.

My eldest is an IVF baby. Dh's sperm, my egg, my body. I don't really see how it can be unethical?

1. I’ll answer for my situation - we already have a child so adoption is not an option atm because our older child would need to be at least 4 years older than an adopted child (and there are very few babies in adoption so our child would need to be about 8 - also lots of very severe needs if you look into it). If we’d never had children before, perhaps. I actually always wanted to adopt until we looked into how it worked (not sure how much you know about it currently). Also the adoption websites/agencies make it VERY clear you shouldn’t adopt if you want a child of your own. It’s not how it works. It’s a very different avenue and lifestyle choice. You don’t adopt because you want your own baby and it’s not fair on the child if that’s how you’re viewing it.
2. I can sort of see this argument but also find it sad. We’re very lucky we self funded. I think the current situation of only offering 1-3 rounds is probably fair but I think there should be more and better self funding options with better loans, especially when you think of all the disgusting human beings who are able to have kids.
3. Hmm but then what is the root cause? We need to all have kids in our twenties? What does that do to cost of living crisis and overall feminism? My mums generation is full of divorced couples who settled down with the wrong person too young. Also in a lot of ivf cases the right embryo could come along at some point, it might just take 5-10 years. We’re speeding up the process and ensuring children are born into (hopefully) happy, suitable homes.

Lots of posts on here saying otherwise!

But often you can - it’s just there needs to be many things in place for it to happen. IVF works because you manage to get the right egg and sperm at the right time. So they are meant to be passed on, you could argue.

I don’t agree with ivf because there are too many unwanted babies and I think there should be more efforts to find parents for those kids. I’m also concerned about the raised levels of complications and defects at birth

@Scrantonicity2 but we did have one naturally - what then? And then one we’re currently pregnant with was apparently a perfect looking blastocyst, whereas for all we know my current child wasn’t! What does that mean?

Hey OP it is no less natural than giving someone chemo when they have cancer. No less natural than giving insulin to a diabetic who relies on it not to die.

The difference is I guess it could be argued as being a choice, as in you can choose a baby but you can’t choose cancer. However you can’t choose infertility or choose conditions that affect fertility. So in that way it’s not a “choice”

I have no problem with IVF medically because it is ultimately an health issue, and we have no ethical issues dealing with other health issues.

Good luck with it :)

I don’t think it’s been too emotive. I still don’t understand how one ivf baby is worse for the population than 5 natural ones?

I’m baffled why it is accepted that it is much more ethical to re home a dog rather than find a pedigree dog the same ethics don’t apply for a baby

With this argument, what do you think of the fact nearly one in four women now give birth by C-section? Should those women and babies not survive?

Also isn’t there a strong possibility you wouldn’t exist because of the interventions that kept you alive as a child?

What do you mean? In the uk at least you don’t sit there choosing a pedigree baby 😂

I have to disagree with this, because the standard for adoption is rightly very high. I will, through no fault of my own, be allowed to adopt. Still wanted a family though!

Re IVF, don't care and have no opinion- but i do not want to pay for people to have it 🤷🏼‍♀️and if it's free, the age limit should be lowered

@Youdontgivemeflowers I would adopt a pet over pedigree. And if I could have just gone and adopted a baby I would have. It’s not actually about genetics for me at all. I don’t think you know how it works.

I would not do it. For me is unnatural so would not like it. If the baby comes with a problem I would feel is because I forced the pregnancy so that is me.

I genuinely don't know where to start with this. You said up thread that there are 'too many unwanted babies' - we're not living in the 1960s where there are a plethora of healthy babies that are given up at birth by unmarried mothers.

I had pre eclampsia so I'd be dead with modern medicine. But that's not just around childbirth is it? Dh had a bone infection at 15 so he would be dead too.

That's why my mum.was one of five and dad was one of 15. You popped them out as 50% of the kids would die.

What's better? Have half your kids die in childhood or modern medicine?

Get on a plane or grow wings?

Walk or train?

Grow your own or waitrose?

Make your own fabric or go naked as God intended?

Get pg every fertile week you have sex or contraception?

Online dating or wait for Mr Perfect

Wheres your line?

Eh? Humans no longer evolve? Of course we do. Evolution didn't stop when humans came along. We're not the pinnacle. We're not the end product.

We may be interfering with the process but it's still going on.

This. We now have abortion (thankfully) which means there aren’t actually loads of unwanted babies.

I agree! (I’m assuming your post was aimed at the person I quoted)

The thing is I feel like there’s more chance of problems naturally?

I feel uncomfortable with the ethics attached to IVF, destroying viable embryos for eg.

I had babies naturally so maybe I have the privilege to be able to think that.