Things I simply don't understand- "proud to be married"

[TheNameIsDickDarlington]

I've seen this statement on a thread today which has prompted this thread.

There are many elements of life that I don't seem to understand. I don't do it on purpose or to be rude but there's some things I've come across in life that I simply don't understand. One of these things is people saying they are "proud to be married" maybe I'm not understanding what is meant by the pride in the statement but to me I just can't understand what's to be proud of? If I got a PHD I'd proud be pretty proud of myself, or climbed everest, or wrote a novel... but I just can't seem to derive any pride from a marriage. Am I getting it all wrong?

Other things I don't understand are:
-Adults "meeting" Disney characters at the Disney theme parks. Because you know its just someone in a suit being paid to wave at you and possibly wee themselves. I got or a bit more when they roamed the parks as it was like you'd spotted them so I guess it was like a game. When I went a few years ago you had to queue up, sometimes for hours, to see them. Why?

• worrying what strangers will think of... pretty much anything (something my mother seems to concern herself with a lot). Why does it matter if someone you don't know thinks, inside their own brain, something about you... you'll never even know?

So AIBU to not "get" these things? Also I'd be interested if there's any other things like this that just baffle some people, what are yours?

Brilliant

Depends how many other Davids there are in his family.
Every single male in DH’s family has the same first name by tradition for generations hence why he’s known by his middle name to stop confusion

Another thing about marriages - why does everyone clap and cheer at the end of the ceremony? It's not like the couple have put on a show that involves magic tricks or a complicated juggling routine that they've been practising for weeks.

I wouldn't say having a child is an accomplishment, but there at least I understand looking at your child and having a sense of "Wow! I made you! A human!" especially when it's still a baby and new to you. I don't understand having the same sense of pride in the fact of being married. I get feeling happy to be with your partner and happy in the fact that you're making a life together generally and even happy with the fact that you've formed this legal relationship that's a sort of external and solid recognition of that relationship - but pride?

I totally get you OP. There are many things people seem to value that I don't understand. Wearing make up, saying socially accepted clichés rather than what you're actually thinking, etc. Being married itself isn't something I feel proud of especially but I am proud to be married to my DH, as in, I'm proud of him and pleased we got married. I'm more proud of my DC.

Yeah that's true there the name is common in our family both as a first and middle name, but then I guess I'm wondering why bother carrying on the tradition? I remember having a boyfriend who had the same name as his father, grandfather, great grandfather and so on all the first sons had that name and I remember him saying to me that if we ever had children the first son would have that name and I just told him that it's not a name I'd choose for my child as I don't really like it so... no.

So I guess I can add to my list:

• doing things just because it's a tradition or "the done thing".

I hear you regarding the Disney characters.
Can I also add the Coca Cola Christmas lorry?

People queued to see it.
It's a lorry?

No, my DH says it all the time.

Ooh and...Santa's grottos. Everyone knows it's not real, even the three year old waiting to see him in the garden centre. And some kids go to multiple.
It's not magical.

People queued to see a lorry? When? Where? WHY?

I've never heard of this.

Re Disney characters they still do ones that you spot! And I guess it’s just fun? It’s ok to find things not fun that other people like though. I don’t get board games for example, but some of my friends think that’s great fun. I’m bored to tears when other people talk about their garden, but they enjoy that. That’s ok. Takes all sorts

But whhhhyyyy is it fun? I can understand people getting joy out of gardening, you plant stuff it grows, you nurture and then it looks nice. I might not enjoy it but I can see where fun could be. Same with sports, which I hate, I can see how some insane people might enjoy an afternoon of competition, doing something physical with their friends. I don't but as you say it takes all sorts.

I simply can't see where the joy comes from with the Disney.

P.s: I have been to Disney thrice, once as a child where I didn't understand the character thing but kins of went along with it as I thought it was like "the game" of the place. Once as a teen with friends where I don't think any of us paid any attention and once as an adult where I found it deeply perplexing.

Ok. Why?

Experience the iconic Coca-Cola Christmas truck firsthand

Yes, it's a lorry. The 'holidays are coming' one from the advert. Or at least, it's a lorry toted up to look like it.

The lorry isn't even a person! You can't even feel obliged to do it because of politeness (like when I had to have my photo taken with a Disney character as a child even though I didn't want to, but did it anyway as I didn't want to offend the person being paid a little more than minimum wage to wear the face of a cartoon candlestick of whatever it was.)

Also any lorry could be the coca cola lorry, it's just been painted red with a logo on it, it's not even like... got artistic merit.

Likewise banking. The branch I once worked at had the equivalent of JT Smith, his wife JT Smith, their two sons - both JT Smith, their daughter JT Smith and an elderly maiden aunt, also a JT Smith. All at the same address, and all of the accounts, bank cards and cheque books just showing the details JT Smith (because that was how they wanted it). They couldn't remember their own bank account number half the time. The confusion it caused. Ye Gods.

Ten pin bowling. It's very popular. I've been. It's underwhelming to say the least.

Considering how many people get divorced or live in miserable marriages and the effort it takes, a long and happy marriage is something worth being proud of. It’s not something everyone is capable of even if they have the opportunity.

Yes! I do not understand grown men and women talking endlessly about a ball game and the players involved. They are so invested in the players it’s really very weird and child like. I secretly judge these people as being a bit dim.

Ummm, because he’s proud to be married to me.

It's even weirder when they talk about the team as if they are on the team. "We've had a really good season"/ "Aren't you playing arsenal next week?" Etc

Yes 😅

I like meeting Disney characters because unless you've been to Disney world, you can never fully appreciate how realistic they are and how much attention to detail Disney puts in. We've just been and so many of the princesses absolutely nailed the voice and mannerisms of that character. Worth queuing up just to see that (our 4 year old princess mad DD aside).

They're putting on a show. It's no different to seeing a show of something that isn't the 'real thing', which plenty of people happily do, because they like the story and want to see it acted out.

I've heard men people who play on a football team say 'I won last week'. Surely you were in a team that won?

It's obvious there's a God but most religions are ridiculous.

I have a colleague who not only went to Disneyland on his honeymoon (no kids), he and his wife are going back for their 25th anniversary this year.

This I do not get.