Present issue - am I being horrible

[lazyalias]

My phone has been misbehaving for the last month. This evening, I popped into the relevant shop to get it sorted. In the end, as there were only a few months left on the contract, I got the early upgrade and damage fees waived (smashed screen), the new phone i wanted ordered - all good.

It turns out DP has actually bought me the phone I've upgraded to as a birthday present. He told me after the new contract was agreed (he knew I was going to the shop) and suggested I get a cheap sim only contract elsewhere. I hadn't said I wanted to leave my current provider as I'm quite happy with them.

Is it OK to v gently push back this present? I am grateful given the money involved but feel like phone contracts are very personal and should be discussed first. I feel horrible given how expensive a gift it is, and it was clearly meant well.

I agree with you OP on this one. I too like doing my own thing phone-wise and would find it a bit of an imposition if my DH chose my next phone without my input, especially if it also meant having to change my normal payment arrangements. I can see how it's a really nice thing to get someone such a useful gift, and they aren't cheap. But I would be politely asking him to return it and to perhaps discuss those types of purchases with you in advance in the future. There's no way I'd get my DH something like that without discussing it with him first to find out what he wants to do.

Sorry I meant the op who claimed she got a £1300 brand new iphone for £900 on contract.

How can that be right? No way are those like for like deals

My husband has form for this I needed a new phone badly we happened to shop together before Xmas a rare event because we argue. I went to the phone shop having done lots of research. Asked for xyz phone and y contract. OH wombles over, starts interfering. Honestly it's my phone, my contract so I said keep shopping for food, he huffed and puffed.

My son has been using my car said the clutch is slipping. OH said right you need a new car. I quietly got quotes from our usual garage and others for a new clutch. Told him this morning all sorted. He then had to stick his oar in and find more bloody quotes.

Frankly it really grinds my gears at times. It's my money. I'd never interfere with his phone, car decisions

He needs to return that phone

Sorry to hijack this thread but is this a sim only price? I'm about to update and this sounds super cheap (and I'm with EE)

Nonsense. Contracts, like every other loan, are designed to line the pockets of the companies who offer them. They aren't handouts but instead take advantage of the 'instant gratification' culture in our society. Want a phone you can't actually afford? No worries. We'll give you one and in return you will pay us ££ above it's actual value over X number of months.

You've obviously got your sums wrong. If not, please link this deal. I'm sure we'll all be jumping all over it.

Really odd of him not to tell you
I also get what you mean.
I had a friend who bought her child a coat for Christmas, when you would get a new coat anyway , same thing.
He does sound a bit controlling about the contract, that would piss me off

Maybe it's a car phone warehouse staff only deal or something 🤷‍♀️ because there's no way a company are selling a £1300 iPhone for £900.

I'd challenge her to find any deal that is cheaper in contract than the same phone and a SIM only deal. She claimed to be able to find them all the time.

@lazyalias

I feel the same as you, but probably for different reasons.

I wouldn't want an unmarried/not living with partner having anything to do with my phone or phone contract for privacy reasons. I suppose I'm paranoid but I'd be worried that somehow they'd be able to view my contract/usage/messages or that our contracts were 'tied' in some way, like a 'family plan' or something. And how would one politely say to a DP "You don't have any type of access to my account, do you? They aren't linked together, are they?" without them wondering why you were so concerned.

O2 sim only, google it.

I pay £8.99 a month and I get unlimited data, unlimited calls, unlimited texts.

Thanks all - is v actually helpful to have a mix of views rather than purely LTB or being told I'm crazy.

Not intending to dripfeed -- I omitted initially because outing, but it doesn't really matter on reflection if a friend sees. My very bigged up Xmas present this year was actually a new cage for my small pets. Useful, but isn't something I would have picked for myself as it's much much more work to clean. DP doesn't have a lot to do with them, and doesn't want to, but felt confident to buy that for me/them too! They love it so I can't take it away from them now, but I'm still a tiny bit annoyed (I obviously think my present to him was superior!).

So a mix of thoughtful and inconvenient is his present style.

Yep.

My dh has iphones. I usually biy him a new one for Christmas or birthday every couple of years from apple. Iv found the insurance better than o2 etc

Not sure re the big deal about it being personal etc. It’s a great present that will save you lots of money
Buying a handset outright is always much more cost effective.

most of the contracts these days are 18 months or 2years and tie you down. It’s essentially a loan and you are paying off the handset .
its nonsense that people are saying your partner should return it ! He’s being smart

He's being smart
It's not about him though is it ?
That's the issue.
He's so clever and moneywise ?
Not what it's about, it's about the ops birthday and her enjoying it.

@lazyalias oh pants!

See if you can change your contract. I think there's normally a cooling off period.

Good luck

Martin Lewis always says you never take out a contract. It's always better value to buy the phone and get a SIM separately.......

I have a sim only contract, unlimited calls, texts and 50gb data for £8pm. Was with Virgin and then they transferred over to O2. I think I know what OP means by it being personal. We all have our own preferences for providers, and she wanted to choose her own.

I’m with Sky Mobile - unlimited calls and texts, 3GB data (I never use it all) - £8 a month.

@lazyalias
i prefer two phones one as main and one as backup
then i use pay as you go, or watsapp, not tied in with any contract

If he “suggested “ knowing you were going to the phone shop it means he was actulay thinking he was telling you ?
most people would say oh I best give your your present early then . This would have let you chat about a better option for you .

He just expected you to do what he had said . Like a PP said this one is on him .

Jist keep your phone and ask him to let you go shopping with the pric she paid for the phone

So he got your pets a present and not you that's a bit twattish! I wouldn't be impressed if my partner bought 'me' a deluxe cat tree, even if my cats would love it.

(I have a phone bought outright + SIM only, it has saved me money. But like you, to me it's a financial decision and not a gift.)

You only need one phone. One has contract one hasn't. I would get back his present and buy something different. Does he need a phone?