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Original poster

Do you think I’ve been uninvited to NYE?

95 replies

Tigandtuk · 31/12/2023 17:52

I moved to a new town in August and I haven’t found it easy to make new friends here. 2 weeks ago I was at a BBQ at a friend’s house (we live in the southern hemisphere. It’s summer here). Our mutual friends didn’t turn up, so it was me, her and some of her friends I hadn’t met before. I made an effort to get to know the other people there so she didn’t feel like she would have to stick with me. That evening she told me she was having a NYE party and she invited me to come. I said yes because I didn’t have plans yet. We didn’t discuss details, but I assume it’s another BBQ at her house.
I’ve messaged her a couple of times since then, wishing her a Merry Christmas and another general chatty text on Friday. She read them but hasn’t replied. Would you assume this means I’m uninvited from NYE? I don’t know and I’m so bad at figuring it out!

OP posts:
2dogsandabudgie · 31/12/2023 17:56

Have your mutual friends been invited?

Original poster
Tigandtuk · 31/12/2023 17:57

Yes but 2 of them are away on holiday so I think only 2 of them are going.
I moved here in August and they’ve all known each other much longer, so I’m not really in the friendship group as much as everyone else.

OP posts:
Sunflower8848 · 31/12/2023 17:58

Just message something casual like “hey, just checking what the plans are this eve? Is the party still on?”

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Events & celebrations
Foodie000 · 31/12/2023 17:59

I think I would assume you’ve been uninvited! Sorry op. Unless she mentions it, I’d drop it, tbh.

coodawoodashooda · 31/12/2023 18:00

Personally, I'd leave it.

Motnight · 31/12/2023 18:01

I would leave it too, Op. Sorry 😔

SirChenjins · 31/12/2023 18:02

I would just leave it - I think she would have sent out a ‘are you still able to make it’ type text by now to so that she knew how many to cater for.

NewyearNewyear2024 · 31/12/2023 18:02

Well they didn’t get back to you so no I wouldn’t go.

Original poster
Tigandtuk · 31/12/2023 18:02

I think I’m going to leave it. I’m kind of annoyed though. I think it’s a mean thing to do. If she had told me she’d changed her mind I could have made other plans, but it’s a bit late now.

OP posts:
GordoStevensMustache · 31/12/2023 18:04

Isn't it after midnight where you are anyway?

Pinkpinkplonk · 31/12/2023 18:04

You could send a message……
I vaguely remember you said something about a New Years Eve party when I saw you last, but I’d had a bit to drink so I can’t quite remember! Dont want to let you down if you are expecting me, I really can’t remember what we said!!

SirChenjins · 31/12/2023 18:04

I agree OP, it’s not a nice thing to do. If you invite someone to an event, especially someone who’s new to the area and probably doesn’t know many people, then you honour the invite and follow up to check they can still come.

moonshinepoursthroughmywindow · 31/12/2023 18:05

I was in that position once (as a teenager) and then on the night I got a puzzled phone call from the party giver saying "aren't you coming?" I'd assumed I would get an actual invitation at some point, but apparently if it had been mentioned to you you were invited. Put it this way, if you turn up she's unlikely to say you can't come in, when she did say you were invited.

MNSlapperTwot · 31/12/2023 18:06

I’d just go with your mutual friends if they are still going. Seems sad to sit home on your own. You’ll still have fun with them, just bring the host a nice present, doubt they will turn you away unless they are a horrible person. They may have had a lot on and lots of messages over Christmas NY and forgot to reply. I’ve never text people to check if they were coming to a party if I had already invited them.

Original poster
Tigandtuk · 31/12/2023 18:07

No. It’s 3pm.

OP posts:
WhyAmINotCleaning · 31/12/2023 18:08

GordoStevensMustache · 31/12/2023 18:04

Isn't it after midnight where you are anyway?

Yep

Original poster
Tigandtuk · 31/12/2023 18:11

I meant the last message to be a reply to @GordoStevensMustache but it went wrong.
It’s just gone 3pm on 31st. There are lots of time zones in the southern hemisphere, just like there are in the northern hemisphere.

OP posts:
Ribenaberry12 · 31/12/2023 18:12

Do you know if the party is going ahead? If some of the friends are away maybe she pulled the party and assumed people wouldn’t come if half the group weren’t around?

Passingthethyme · 31/12/2023 18:13

She may have legitimately forgotten, especially if she had been drinking or it may be because you're mutual friends aren't going she's decided it's better for you not to go, she may have even decided not to have a party. Who knows. If you want to go, you could just ask and leave it open ended. If she's not replied to your texts maybe she's just a bit flakey.

Tonight1 · 31/12/2023 18:13

Umm...if it's around 3pm there I'd call and ask if it was still on and what time. Nothing to lose.

Yozzer87 · 31/12/2023 18:15

I'd leave it and I wouldn't send any more messages either.

NancyJoan · 31/12/2023 18:15

‘Just checking if we’re still on for later? If so, what time shall I come, and what shall I bring?’

LadyMargaretDevereux · 31/12/2023 18:18

I'd leave it if she hasn't responded to your texts recently.

Coconutter24 · 31/12/2023 18:22

I’d be tempted to message one of your mutual friends to ask what her plans are and if she hasn’t any see if she’s up for making some. I wouldn’t bother texting the friend who invited you cos she’s already ignored a couple of your messages and if she was really bothered she would of responded to your messages at some point or remembered she invited you so would text you to let you know party details

Princessfluffy · 31/12/2023 18:23

Stop playing guessing games and call her!

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