Had a friendship group for a couple of years. Lovely women all same age, similar jobs and similar incomes, stages of life so it worked well. We are all 29 and have been friends for 5 years- met through a hobby.
I got on brilliantly with all of them and saw them weekly- however I noticed last year one of my friends started to put me down. Always making negative comments about me or my choices. Never really happy for me and seemed irritated when something good happened for me. She seemed to change overnight.
A few examples were when I met someone new after being single for 3 years, I’d become really happy and she would say things like “oh well, he’s bound to cheat on you eventually at some point” and was genuinely negative and eye rolled whenever I brought it up. She is married herself- so not the last standing single. I’d been to her wedding and celebrated her.
and the majority of the comments were aimed about my weight. In the past year, I’ve shamefully put on about a stone and a half. It’s no excuse but I’ve been through a lot this year, bereavement, job change, had to move house twice due to landlords selling so it’s been a lot. It’s something I’m going to be working on in the new year.
She would make comments like “Oh, thank goodness you’ve left some I thought you were going to eat all that” after I left some of my jacket potato in a cafe. I also tried on a coat in a shop and she said to me “I’m glad you’re not buying that- I didn’t think it would fit you”. I then commented back, and said well I have gone up a size this year and she said “yes you’re not big, but you sort of are very large”
So I let it slide, until the comments continued- everything from when I went to a job interview and she replied “wouldn’t get my hopes up if I was you” and then I brought a sandwich to our hobby for lunch and when I finished it she said “that’s gone already, the whole sandwich?”
Three weeks ago, I snapped, and said to her that she shouldn’t be commenting on my eating or weight. It’s horrible and rude. I snapped in front of our friendship group and now I’ve been ghosted pretty much by everyone. I think they all think I’m horrible- I’ve reached out to a couple of them as normal and been ignored. Only one as responded.
im a little bit worried as these are pretty much my only friends. We’ve got tickets to a Christmas show on Saturday and I was going to go still and the one who has responded has said I should but I don’t feel like I’m really wanted there now. We used to talk every day on our WhatsApp group and now it’s radio silence so I think they’ve made one without me in it.
I also don’t feel like I should apologise either! Ah! Don’t know what to do.